SuicideGirl: Morgan
suicidegirl

Morgan will crack open that book and read for fun's sake

I’m private
 
OCTOBER 29, 2002 @ 08:27 AM


This is the song that doesn't end
yes it goes on and on my friend...

Have you seen Not Proud.com? It's a very disturbing and funny website where people confess their sins. My favourite so far is "I looked at boobies on my laptop. I then preceded to put my finger on the screen where the boobies were and rubbed them. It gave me sexual pleasure."

Notproud also makes me feel very sad about how terrible humans can be to each other. It's a very mixed bag website, you can be going through and laughing at how goofy people are and then all of a sudden you hit something that depressing and almost horrifying. I usually walk away from it thinking "how can people be so MEAN to each other?" And then so guiltless. I've done some pretty terrible things in my lifetime, but I looked at them as learning experiences, something i'd never do again because I hate to hurt people, and i've never stopped feeling guilty for them. So how a person can realize that they've really hurt another human being and not feel a teeny bit of guilt is beyond me.

Today is going to be very uneventful but stupidly busy. I want to get my care package from my dad in the mail because I am getting to the point where all I have to eat is peanut butter. And i LOST my can-opener.

I want to spend all day in the shower, warm and soapy, but then my skin would be all dry and wintery when I was done.

Questions:
1. Who do you consider to be your best friend?

2. Do you remember your dreams? What was your best dream ever? worst?

Previous

PAGE: 

1 | 2

Next

Comments
Morgan

Morgan

SUICIDEGIRL

Illinois, USA

OCT 29, 2002 08:31 AM

Oh, also!!! THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT! I need more questions. I'm not out but I don't ever want to run out. So e-mail me questions you think are interesting or would like to see asked! do it do it do it!

smile

Okay, now my answers:

1. Right now, I would say Nick (nick42 on SG, but ya'll know that by now) is my best friend. He's the person I share the most of myself with and who shares the most of himself with me. And he's the person I feel safest and have the most fun with, which is important for best-friendness. I wish I could say I have a best friend here at college, but I don't. I'm workin' on it, though.

2. I only remember my dreams if they are extreme in one way or another. If they are really really good dreams, I make SURE i remember them. If they're really bad, i'll usually remember images from them.

My best dream of course was my Nick Drake dream (where he came back as an angel just to see ME). My worst I can only remember images from...I think the "plot" was that I could see inside the mind of a serial killer, and I kept seeing these images flashing of girls in lakes, with their hair spread out in the water and bleeding. They were very vivid and disturbing images.

So instead of thinking about them I think about Nick Drake.

XbattletoadsX

XBattletoadsX

Syracuse, NY
OLD SKOOL

OCT 29, 2002 08:46 AM

Videogame withdrawl BAD! you might beable to play IWD2 if you can do bauldersgate you probly can. It rocks, but anyways

1. My best friend, i technicly have 3. The first is my friend Mike, i havent seen him in like 5 years, and i miss seeing his scrawny dorky self. You see, he was "mentaly challanged" so he learned slower, but he rocked cause he was as big a gamer as me.

the second is my friend Steve, he is now in the navy, cause of his shitty ex girlfriend. stupid bitch...anyways. He and i have like everything in common

and the last and probly my BEST friend no matter what is Jemola. we met in like 10th grade and we are like Jay and Silent bob. its so freaky.
With all 3 of them i can talk about whatever and they will understand, i can poor my feelings and they keep them confidential. they rock

2. i remember a good portion of my dreams. Some of them are super geeky like me being a DND charicter and all my friends as well while people are bursting into orcs and such. my best though... The one in which i Meet people from SG alot of you, most memerable Morgan. The dream came to me at a time when i gave up, on everything, my life, hope, people. It inspired me to move on, to try harder and not be afraid of rejection.

Worst... the one where im forced to live through my grandparents death day after day, first my grandpa then grandma then other grandpa, then my grandma(the only one still alive) and living through it over and over and over...family is everything to me...and having to remember those times hurt...alot.

jupiter6

jupiter6

Svalbard And Jan Mayen
OLD SKOOL

OCT 29, 2002 09:31 AM

notproud reminds me of one of my favorite comics. ted rall, whose political comics are just ingenius, had a thing where he had people send him stories about the worst thing they'd ever done. he picked out various ones and drew comics about them and released it as a book called "real americans admit: the worst thing i've ever done." some truly disturbing shit.

1. my best friend is a girl named ray. i've only known her for 4 years, but i'd be totally lost without her.

2. i used to remember my dreams alot more than i do now. i don't really know what my best or worst dreams were, but i used to have those dreams where when you wake up, you could swear the dream was actually happening... it was usually quite sad to then realize it was only a dream. damnit.

eddie quote of the day: "cats are much cooler than dogs... cats have a scam going. you buy them food, they eat the food, they go away. that's the deal. you have no control over your cat!"

TheOriginalSin

TheOriginalSin

I'm lost
September 2002

OCT 29, 2002 09:45 AM

1. My best friend is nazimova. We've known each other for ten year and she's a real sweet heart. She total excepts people for who they are.

2. My best dreams are flying dreams. My worst, I dreamt I was being obducted by aliens and I couldn't move. It a very helpless and powerless feeling.

navin

navin

Seattle, WA
September 2002

OCT 29, 2002 09:46 AM

1. this is cheating, but there are at least three... my buddy chris, seriously my male version of a soul mate, my dad, and my wife smile

2. i don't tend to remember most of my dreams... but the best i can remember had to do with like the most ridiculously bad ass day... snowboarding in 2' of new, then all of a sudden skating through the streets of seattle (i was real good) and lastly ending up at a show with all my friends... it was a sweet dream...
worst dream? i once dreamt that i cheated on my wife (she was my girlfriend at the time) and that she found out, and wouldn't forgive me...

rawr_ima_monster

rawr_ima_monster

Los Angeles, CA
July 2002

OCT 29, 2002 10:12 AM

EVERYone had a crush on thirtyseven that day. the testosterone-based pushing and shoving for attention was shameless.
I myself tend to take long showers also, it is fun and relaxing, but it makes for high utility bils so I'm trying not to do it now that it's not all free. You don't need a can opener for peanut butter, but they can be easilly replaced at 99 cent stores....sometimes for 99 cents.
answers:
1. This question used to make me go "eep" when I wasyounger and had to pick between all my friends I loved so much, but growing up has thinned out the crowd and made me have importnat realizations. The answer is undoubtedly my older brother. He is the best, and no friend can beat family.
2. I almost never remember my dreams and it's sad. I tend to dream very realistic uninteresting situations, like being out at a restaurant with my family or friends and something awkward happens, or having a conversation ina car with friends. I am convinced tht often these events eventually happen and specific pieced of unimportnat dialogue are repeated in Exact sequence, and I get WIERD gichy deja vu. it happens alot actually.
The most recent dream I can remember was sleeping all cuddly curled up with a big heavy breathing brown bear, that didn't seem to have much feelings for or against me, it was sleeping. I had a dream a bout sleeping. lame. It was nice though. bears are fuzzy and warm.
The worst dream I ever remember remembering was when I was in the hospital on drugs and I had one of these dreams where you wake up in teh dream but it's still a dream, and it involved a bunch of different things, but I only remmeber the last one, where I was in some osrt of nonexistant fast food place with my parents in a mall, and these guys ran up to us and stried to mug or hurt us and everyone ran away, aand they were cahsing us, and I fended tehm off as my parents got the car. I wasn't good at hurting them, but I mamaged to get away, my dad had the passenger door of 2 door open and was trying to figure out if he should get in the back or if he should WAIT for me to get in (CRAZY mugges behind us!) and I shoved him in the back, slammed the seat back and got in, and this guy grabbed me and I reached out to punch him (felt odd to me), and I felt this pain and heard this clang, and I woke up fo real and had pucnhed the phone next to me. my mother was asupposed ot be coming to visit me any minute, and I was REALLY legitimately worried that I had punched my mom in the face, but she wasnt' there yet.
-it's funnier than it seemed then.
Dave

sockmonkey

sockmonkey

Portland, OR
July 2002

OCT 29, 2002 10:34 AM

Hey, thanks for the B-day wishes. Now to answer those questions.

1. My wife for sure, she is the best.
2. I can usually remember parts of my dreams. The best dreams are flying dreams, they seem so real. I can't think of the worst dream I've ever had.

fatelvis5

fatelvis5

Philadelphia, PA
OLD SKOOL

OCT 29, 2002 10:42 AM

1 — My best friend is Devalina. Deval and Neal. Yeah, Neal too. They are the bestest.

2 — Best dream: When I was 10, I had a dream that me and the Dukes of Hazzard battled a T-Rex. We totally fucking kicked his ass.

Worst Dream: When I was 6 or 7, I had a dream that my mean next-door neighbor kidnapped me. He kept me in a kitchen cabinet, and would make me watch through the window whenever my mom was out front. I wasn't allowed to talk to her, and she couldn't see or hear me, I just had to watch her.

crazydasaint

crazydasaint

Washington, DC
OLD SKOOL

OCT 29, 2002 11:59 AM

1) Hrm... part of the reason I moved here was that one of my best friends from college is in the area. He's been dating another friend of mine for about 5 years. They're both dear friends, but they're so close to each other... I feel a bit outside when they discuss what they'll name their kids.

I have some close friends, but I don't know if any of them could really count as best... I guess I'm just a loner (Dottie, a rebel...)

2) I never remember my dreams. If I wake up remembering a deam I try to write it down immediately, because I know otherwise I'll forget it.

My best dreams are total wish fulfilment-- the kind that make you upset when you realize they didn't really happen. They often involve one of my exes coming back and declaring undying love for me: "That guy I dumped you for was a big mistake!"

G_FELIX

G_FELIX

I'm lost
September 2002

OCT 29, 2002 02:10 PM

Hey Morgan,

People have always been the same. We are just in the information age and just happen to learn more nowadays.

1. I'd have to say my wife. Awwww...... :-)

2. Sometimes. They usually fade with the mornings light.
BEST: Feeling warm and loved and surrounded by friends. Could not tell you where I was and I did not care!
WORST: Do you remember the armagadden scene in Terminator 2 where she is at the fence and the atomic blast turns her into ash. I had one similar to that. Scared the crap out of me! Only dream I remember waking up sweating.

*regarding your post on my journal*
I know what Freud would say about tornados. I'm not sure what to think myself....
Maybe your ceiling fan was on a too high of setting! :-)

jupiter6

jupiter6

Svalbard And Jan Mayen
OLD SKOOL

OCT 29, 2002 02:59 PM

if you like rall's columns, check out www.rall.com. it's fantabulous. biggrin

nick42

nick42

Charlottesville, VA
July 2002

OCT 29, 2002 03:14 PM

1. morgan

2.not really

CatBoner

CatBoner

Ventura, CA
August 2002

OCT 29, 2002 03:35 PM

1. this one guy that i've known since we were little kids.

2. sometimes i remember them, somtimes i dont. sometimes they'll just be me doing normal everyday things, but when they're weird. theyre REALLY weird. the strangest and probably my favorite dream ever was this: i was walking through a building with lots of halls with a group of people that i don't know. i knew i was walking through for a reason, but i have no idea what that reason was. we leave the building and start walking across a path in a middle of a field of grass. on the other end of the field is a rocket ship. at this point, i notice that i'm holding my cat, and the reason we are walking together is so that i can put my cat in the rocket ship and shoot him into space. about halway across the field, the cat jumps out of my arms and starts running about in the grass. eventually he comes upon an armadillo. but this armadillo is all black and evil looking. the cat and the armadillo start to fight, but not visciously, more like when two cats play or something. thats the last i remember of the dream.

emanonXXX

emanonXXX

Winnipeg, MB
August 2002

OCT 29, 2002 03:42 PM

1. Who do you consider to be your best friend?

She unfortunately died yesterday along with my heart

2. Do you remember your dreams? What was your best dream ever? worst?

Yeah. All of them. The ones that predict a happy future are the best, the worst are the nightmares that come true.

tryptamine

tryptamine

Svalbard And Jan Mayen
August 2002

OCT 29, 2002 06:05 PM

1. ooh, that's a hard one, but i'd probably have to say my friend Munir. our friendship goes through cycles of fighting and not fighting, but even when we "hate" each other, we still love each other. we've both forced each other to grow in amazing ways, psychologically and spiritually, and we both think we know each other better than anyone else. we even figured out that we were sisters in a past life. biggrin

2. not always, but when i do, they are never dull. my best dream ever started badly: i was wandering, lost, in a dark and scary house where demons were chasing me trying to eat my soul. but suddenly i realized i was dreaming, so i took my own hand (!) and said, "lets go somewhere a little nicer." suddenly, the front door appeared and opened onto this beautiful sunlit meadow that stretched as far as i could see.

i don't have bad dreams very often, but when i do, they are really bad. i don't want to describe them in detail but the worst so far were two that involved atomic bombs and a disturbingly calm attitude towards them.

PreviousNext
Past
JANUARY 2003

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

15

16

17

18

19

20

21

22

23

24

25

26

27

28

29

30

31

DECEMBER 2002

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

15

16

17

18

19

20

21

22

23

24

25

26

27

28

29

30

31

NOVEMBER 2002