Maxi's July 20, 2009 blog

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JULY 20, 2009 @ 07:37 AM

Getting to know my vagina

You would think after over 38 years we would already be well acquainted.
I know my way around it blindfolded, but that is the point.
I know this body part better as if i were blind than i know it if i saw it on the street, in pictures, hell in a police line up! lol.

I'm not use to seeing it on a regular basis, not all of it. just mostly the front of what one would view from the mirror if standing directly in front of it, Not the under sides and from behind.

I have a good feeling I'm not alone here. My GYN and my boyfriend and other lovers and GYN's before have a better knowledge of it visually than I do.

I have a little bit of an insecurity about it. Do all Vagins have to live up to a physical and visual standard? I mean the landscaping trends are enough. isn't there enough pressure put on women as it is.
I don't know if i had an issue showing pink in photographs because i was shy and embarrassed about how my flower looked or how i would be perceived showing it. It's labia is very puffy, and my little lady in the boat is rather large. I don't have a clitoris that is hard to find, it's kinda in your face. I wonder if that says a lot about the amount of testosterone levels in my system.

Lately it's been showing up in more photographs, I hope me letting down my guard and pushing my own set boundaries is a path to inner growth, a sign of embracing all of me. I don't want my relationships and peers effecting how i feel about my body, but sometimes it does... Sometimes my hangups about sex and sexuality get in the way as well. I don't want to be swayed, but still want to be respected for my choices. I intend on showing more and keeping it as graceful as possible.
I won't lie, as i first started seeing it in well lit photographs i was horrified! taken back by all it's pink puffy flesh. Maybe i thought i looked too exposed and vulgar. but even if i was just sitting there bottomless and thinking serene thoughts it still shook me as pornographic or what i perceive as dirty. I'm working on changing my view of my vag so to speak......

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Bushka

SUICIDEGIRL

Australia

JUL 20, 2009 07:52 AM

also at 38, i hold many of the same views as you. and i'm still not convinced mine's 'photogenic' enough...(though, by who's definition of photogenic i'm going by is anyones guess...)

Trauma

Downey, CA

April 2005

JUL 20, 2009 07:56 AM

whatever you decide, I support you all the way

ChiTownGuy32

Colfax, IA

October 2005

JUL 20, 2009 08:05 AM

All vaginas are not created equal, but that is why they are all so lovely and interesting. I would hate to see a wave of vaginaplasty take over at SG (not that you were implying this was what you were thinking about) because of what the dominant media says they should (or should not) look like. Lord knows we have enough angst over how a woman's breasts should look like. I say celebrate the differences!

ED1E1US

I'm lost

August 2006

JUL 20, 2009 08:58 AM

With much respect to women and their feelings about their vagina, this is a very deep topic and all of your views/feelings must be respected. I just hope one day, you will emerge knowing that as you described it 'flower' in itself the beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I for one love the diversity of the vagina, and the 'fleshier' the better.

Let's not create a 'norm' for pussie, it is a beautiful and unique part of the female form that is to be appreciated in every way

Northron

I'm lost

November 2004

JUL 20, 2009 09:14 AM

Whew, sounds like this Summer is for taking some large steps. Congratulations.

Texaspsych

San Antonio, TX

July 2005

JUL 20, 2009 09:41 AM

Wow that was an amazing insight to what I assume is a point of concern many women have. The fact that you see and address this hang shows you are willing to work on it.
I was about to write something about not worrying but if it was that easy not to worry about it then you wouldn't. I just want to say that I hope you get to the level of comfort with yourself that you are happy with. Take care honey.

Kay

SUICIDEGIRL

Antarctica

JUL 20, 2009 10:01 AM

I love reading your journals, because you express things so well, and things that I think about from time to time. I'm with you, I'm not really visually aware of my vagina. I mean, I know it is there, but like the bottom of my foot, I really do not look at it, unless there is a malfunction. I'm okay with that. I had been worried at a time in my life what it appeared like to other people, but then I have come to realize the body is a whole, and it is simply a component of that whole. It is no more or no less vulgar than my earlobes, both of which can be sensual spots, like any part of the body can be. It warrants to me, no more attention than another part, external, or internal. That being said though, when I view other humans, male or female, I do not obsess over genitals, and I'm not a butt girl, or a leg girl, or an eye girl. It is the whole person that I find interesting to the eye. I know some people dial in on specific body parts, but I find that I do not. There is more in the negative that I would ever find in the personality, than I ever would anothers body. If that all makes sense?

actonjacton

Phoenix, AZ

October 2003

JUL 20, 2009 10:01 AM

99.8% of vag's look really nice to me, but I can understand the thoughts.
I wouldn't want photos of my cock seen unless it was fully erect and and the lighting was right... But that's probably a different issue!

pavlovsdog

Asheville, NC

May 2004

JUL 20, 2009 10:18 AM

The Vagina Workshop from Eve Ensler's Vagina Monologues.

rlvlk

I'm lost

November 2007

JUL 20, 2009 10:28 AM

Simply put, your vagina is beautiful because it is a part of you. But, you ladies see flaws where none exist. Puffy labia, large clitoris makes your vagina, well, unique to you. Those don't make it ugly, non-photogenic, nasty...

What ever physical flaws you ladies THINK you have, MOST people will never notice.

But, hey, if you feel the need to post more pics and allow us to tell you how beautiful you and your vagina are, please, by all means, do so

SaltLord

USA

September 2006

JUL 20, 2009 11:17 AM

I'm glad that every one that I have had the pleasure of enjoying has been different from first to present. For the amount of intense intimacy that drives my lust into embracing taste, smell and feel that causes my eyes to roll into the back of my head. Looks have never really played a huge part in my obsession in sex with women that interest me. It’s important that she wants me to give her oral attention. I want to feel her respond to my breath and touch. To hear her noises and have her tug on my hair.

It's hard (pun?) to reasure when all I know about you is through a computer. I do know that you are very beautiful.

Think of the billions of women, right now, that have them as well as you do. That we are all born, naturally, without clothes as we have for thousands of years. Dirty and pornographic…. It’s too important to who you are or we are as the human race to be pushed down like that. Seeing a baby in an ultrasound is not pornographic but, it’s part of the same system. Sex and birth is an amazing and wonderful part of all life. It is your right to enjoy without shame and we love nothing better then helping you enjoy it! At least I know I do.

38 years ago you were born with the same body and knowledge that a human 9 thousand years was born with. The only difference is what you have learned in your days since birth. 9 thousand years from now, nothing will change but our perspective shaped by our culture.

The best mirror for you, would be the eyes of those that love (or lust for) you.
It's got my vote!

hardticket

Kingston, ON

December 2005

JUL 20, 2009 12:27 PM

Wow. First i am impressed at your honesty.

For a guy's perspective, i don't say this glibly or sarcastically, but i have never seen a pussy i didn't like. they have all been different and i have found them all beautiful. I can see your concerns but in the end it is what you are most comfortable with and what makes you the happiest that truly matters.