PICS
I think i'm gonna loose it on somebody, so I decided to run to the "sanctuary" of my blog.
I'm really getting disgusted with some of the sheer, bullshit cattiness of some of the girls on the site. I'm sick of everyone getting pissy and trying to start shit wherever they land. It's ridiculous. They criticize the staff, they bitch at other SG's, they can't be made happy. I'm not going to elaborate as to what they say or who it is, because I feel that it would just fuel their little cunt rage. They have their pink panties in a wad. I realize, I'm young, I'm new, I'm probably not what they would consider SG material, but i could give a fuck less what people like that have to say. It's just offensive and depressing to see women, no girls, catty little high school girls, that I once aspired to be like turn to such tactics and such low standards of self-expression. I may be seriously dellusional. On the other hand, some women on the site still greatly hold my respect. You know who you are. You are the women that have stood your ground, without being overtly malicious and vain. Thank you. Thank you all for helping me hold it together.
Now, thank you for reading my rant. I have to ask though, if I ever start acting like a bitch, smack me back into line.
PS Shannyn Sossamon is gorgeous! I've always been amazed by her!
I'm really getting disgusted with some of the sheer, bullshit cattiness of some of the girls on the site. I'm sick of everyone getting pissy and trying to start shit wherever they land. It's ridiculous. They criticize the staff, they bitch at other SG's, they can't be made happy. I'm not going to elaborate as to what they say or who it is, because I feel that it would just fuel their little cunt rage. They have their pink panties in a wad. I realize, I'm young, I'm new, I'm probably not what they would consider SG material, but i could give a fuck less what people like that have to say. It's just offensive and depressing to see women, no girls, catty little high school girls, that I once aspired to be like turn to such tactics and such low standards of self-expression. I may be seriously dellusional. On the other hand, some women on the site still greatly hold my respect. You know who you are. You are the women that have stood your ground, without being overtly malicious and vain. Thank you. Thank you all for helping me hold it together.
Now, thank you for reading my rant. I have to ask though, if I ever start acting like a bitch, smack me back into line.
PS Shannyn Sossamon is gorgeous! I've always been amazed by her!
Ok, I have to share my story of the backpacking trip my dad and I had this weekend!
We decided that we wanted to go camping for the one night that he was off and I was in town, so we came to the conclusion that would hike up the mountain at Frozen Head State Park in Wartburg, TN. I've packed it before, but this was the first time we had packed it together. We both packed our bags full of clothes, since we assumed that it would be freezing on the mountain during the night, and full of things we would need like fire starters, sterno, food, water, pots, sleeping bags, etc.
So Saturday, we drive up there at about 4pm. I calculated that we would only need about 2 hours to make the entire hike since we are both pretty decent hikers. Sadly, my dad was running on 45 mins of sleep and what sleep I had gotten the night before was horrible due to my episode with being drunk and angry. Basically, neither of us were fit to do the actual hike. Around 2.5 miles up the mountain, I realized that I had lost my awesome little pink sweater. "FUCK!" I shouted as I wiggled out of my very heavy pack. "I fuckin lost my sweater. What the fuck? When do I remember seeing it last?" Well, from there, my incredibly awesome daddy decided to walk back down the trail to try and find it. With flashlight and walking stick in tow, he took off down the trail.
I'm sitting alone on a trail, an hours RUN from anybody, from anything. I'm pretty calm. I sit and wonder how far back i dropped it and if one of the people we passed may have picked it up. It's about 6:30pm. Sundown is in about an hour or less. I finally gathered myself enough to walk up off the trail a little bit and clear a spot for a campsite. We were not going to make it to the actual campsite a mile further up the trail before it got way to dark. I pitched the tent, I dug a hole with my bare hands and a stick to put a small fire in (which was a no-no because it's a dry season and backwoods fires are banned, even at designated sites), I opened a can of sterno with a tent stake so we would have some sort of fire, and I marked the trail for my dad with a glow stick i just happened to put in my pack. I didn't have any string to tie the stick up, so I used part of a poncho to tie it in a branch.
I had just enough of signal to use my cellphone to call my dad to make sure he was ok. I asked him where he was, and he said that he had made it all the way back to the car and asked a couple we had passed if they had seen it. I was so surprised that he would go to such lengths to find a damn sweater. At least i knew he was ok, but it was about 7:40pm and it was sundown. I was so worried about him coming back up the mountain.
At about 8:40pm, i hear something other than the crazy sounds I had been hearing all afternoon. My dad was panting, dragging himself up the hill. I ran down to the trail and held him up. He was drenched in sweat. "You marked the trail? You amaze me," he said as he caught his breath. We got him and his pack up to the little campsite I had set up. Together, we collected stones so we could cook the stew beef we had brought up. All night, my dad kept telling me how amazing it was that I had thought of all of the things that I had done. I had even come up with plan to go looking for him, which shocked him because it was so sensible. I'm not saying that I'm Rambo or anything, but when it comes to roughing it, i'm pretty damn good at it.
We ate really well and got some rest. We set our cell alarms for about 5:30am so we could leave before rangers came out. It was too dark out then, so we napped for about an hour more. We hiked back down an hour. We only stopped to grab a water out of the cooler and for me to pull up my pants because the strap on my pack kept pushing them down. We got back to the car, and drove down the rangers station to see if anyone had turned in my sweater. As we approached the stairs, my dad said, "There it is!!!" Someone had laid it on a shelf next to the registration center. I was amazed!
So that's the story of Maslow the Survivor, Maz's dad the Saint, and the little pink sweater!
We decided that we wanted to go camping for the one night that he was off and I was in town, so we came to the conclusion that would hike up the mountain at Frozen Head State Park in Wartburg, TN. I've packed it before, but this was the first time we had packed it together. We both packed our bags full of clothes, since we assumed that it would be freezing on the mountain during the night, and full of things we would need like fire starters, sterno, food, water, pots, sleeping bags, etc.
So Saturday, we drive up there at about 4pm. I calculated that we would only need about 2 hours to make the entire hike since we are both pretty decent hikers. Sadly, my dad was running on 45 mins of sleep and what sleep I had gotten the night before was horrible due to my episode with being drunk and angry. Basically, neither of us were fit to do the actual hike. Around 2.5 miles up the mountain, I realized that I had lost my awesome little pink sweater. "FUCK!" I shouted as I wiggled out of my very heavy pack. "I fuckin lost my sweater. What the fuck? When do I remember seeing it last?" Well, from there, my incredibly awesome daddy decided to walk back down the trail to try and find it. With flashlight and walking stick in tow, he took off down the trail.
I'm sitting alone on a trail, an hours RUN from anybody, from anything. I'm pretty calm. I sit and wonder how far back i dropped it and if one of the people we passed may have picked it up. It's about 6:30pm. Sundown is in about an hour or less. I finally gathered myself enough to walk up off the trail a little bit and clear a spot for a campsite. We were not going to make it to the actual campsite a mile further up the trail before it got way to dark. I pitched the tent, I dug a hole with my bare hands and a stick to put a small fire in (which was a no-no because it's a dry season and backwoods fires are banned, even at designated sites), I opened a can of sterno with a tent stake so we would have some sort of fire, and I marked the trail for my dad with a glow stick i just happened to put in my pack. I didn't have any string to tie the stick up, so I used part of a poncho to tie it in a branch.
I had just enough of signal to use my cellphone to call my dad to make sure he was ok. I asked him where he was, and he said that he had made it all the way back to the car and asked a couple we had passed if they had seen it. I was so surprised that he would go to such lengths to find a damn sweater. At least i knew he was ok, but it was about 7:40pm and it was sundown. I was so worried about him coming back up the mountain.
At about 8:40pm, i hear something other than the crazy sounds I had been hearing all afternoon. My dad was panting, dragging himself up the hill. I ran down to the trail and held him up. He was drenched in sweat. "You marked the trail? You amaze me," he said as he caught his breath. We got him and his pack up to the little campsite I had set up. Together, we collected stones so we could cook the stew beef we had brought up. All night, my dad kept telling me how amazing it was that I had thought of all of the things that I had done. I had even come up with plan to go looking for him, which shocked him because it was so sensible. I'm not saying that I'm Rambo or anything, but when it comes to roughing it, i'm pretty damn good at it.
We ate really well and got some rest. We set our cell alarms for about 5:30am so we could leave before rangers came out. It was too dark out then, so we napped for about an hour more. We hiked back down an hour. We only stopped to grab a water out of the cooler and for me to pull up my pants because the strap on my pack kept pushing them down. We got back to the car, and drove down the rangers station to see if anyone had turned in my sweater. As we approached the stairs, my dad said, "There it is!!!" Someone had laid it on a shelf next to the registration center. I was amazed!
So that's the story of Maslow the Survivor, Maz's dad the Saint, and the little pink sweater!
I saw it coming. I never should have allowed myself to be so weak. I refuse to be a victim for him. Why would anyone use me like that? Someday, someone will appreciate me. Someday. I will have that someone that will be grateful for what I am willing to do and they will return my effort. Until then, it's me and the pug. Pity me. I need it. Pity him. He needs it more than I do. Poor soul. Misery loves company, and some people don't know what to do if they aren't miserable. He will always be, that is, until he realizes that people can have genuine like for him and not everyone is a crooked as he is. I'm not too torn up though. I'm actually kind of relieved. I still want my money and I want his shit out of my truck. I want to be able to put the seats down again so I can put an air mattress in it and be a crazy ass pimp. Yeah, cold hearted bitch that I am. Well, good night guys. I think i'm gonna sit around and listen to music while I still have some computer juice.
Yeah, cold hearted bitch that I am. Well, good night guys. I think i'm gonna sit around and listen to music while I still have some computer juice.Update:
- Love my new class. The professor is awesome. I have so much work though.
- Miss my beau. I'm just in a lonely mood.
- I have a GREAT idea for a set. I'm dying to do it.
- I wish my current would go up. Getting antsy, but oh well.
- Colbert would totally get my vote!
- I'm addicted to pixie stixs. I've eaten 4 in the past 3 minutes. Sugar headache a'comin.
- After eating dinner with my friends today, I realized that I like guys way more than girls as buddies. They are so much more fun.
- I heart boobies.
- Man things can get really crazy around here.
- Fuckin love you guys. Cookies for everybody!
- Love my new class. The professor is awesome. I have so much work though.
- Miss my beau. I'm just in a lonely mood.
- I have a GREAT idea for a set. I'm dying to do it.
- I wish my current would go up. Getting antsy, but oh well.
- Colbert would totally get my vote!
- I'm addicted to pixie stixs. I've eaten 4 in the past 3 minutes. Sugar headache a'comin.
- After eating dinner with my friends today, I realized that I like guys way more than girls as buddies. They are so much more fun.
- I heart boobies.
- Man things can get really crazy around here.
- Fuckin love you guys. Cookies for everybody!
Hit Replay
i'm listening in a loop
floating on a cloud
only concerned with getting wet
can't say it matters
it all matters more
i'm a hypocrit
but i never contradict myself
wondering where she went
cleaning the mirror to try and find her
loved and alive
can't ask for more
carry on soldier
hard as a rock
you're making me cry
but that's what happiness is
all i ask is are you that one
or do you lie
keep it under wraps
no one will know
regression from aggression
obsession from depression
leave a scent leave a stain
just don't leave
afraid of what may come
hope it never will
bad to the bone
rotten to the core
black and white never looked so gray
gray never looked so good
beat me once shame on you
beat me twice i ask for more
just in it for a giggle or two
come out with a tear or two
never believe what I say
because it's all sincere
recoiled and reserved
couldn't want to touch you more
you want to know what I'm thinking
my thoughts get cold out in space
stirring up storms
wishing for a calm
you could be perfect
if you were just like me
fill that void
plug that hole
take it on
leave it off
dress me like a doll
strip me down
smokin in the woods
16 again it seems
shaking change in my pocket
although i wanted it stirred
let's never be apart
i need time for me
don't listen to what I say
read my lips
alone in the crowd
standing in the spotlight
sigh and moan
grunt and groan
you're the one that adore
i couldn't hate you more
dirty boys and girls
hide and go seek in the closet
rub your eyes
squint at these words
they are all for you
i'm listening in a loop
floating on a cloud
only concerned with getting wet
can't say it matters
it all matters more
i'm a hypocrit
but i never contradict myself
wondering where she went
cleaning the mirror to try and find her
loved and alive
can't ask for more
carry on soldier
hard as a rock
you're making me cry
but that's what happiness is
all i ask is are you that one
or do you lie
keep it under wraps
no one will know
regression from aggression
obsession from depression
leave a scent leave a stain
just don't leave
afraid of what may come
hope it never will
bad to the bone
rotten to the core
black and white never looked so gray
gray never looked so good
beat me once shame on you
beat me twice i ask for more
just in it for a giggle or two
come out with a tear or two
never believe what I say
because it's all sincere
recoiled and reserved
couldn't want to touch you more
you want to know what I'm thinking
my thoughts get cold out in space
stirring up storms
wishing for a calm
you could be perfect
if you were just like me
fill that void
plug that hole
take it on
leave it off
dress me like a doll
strip me down
smokin in the woods
16 again it seems
shaking change in my pocket
although i wanted it stirred
let's never be apart
i need time for me
don't listen to what I say
read my lips
alone in the crowd
standing in the spotlight
sigh and moan
grunt and groan
you're the one that adore
i couldn't hate you more
dirty boys and girls
hide and go seek in the closet
rub your eyes
squint at these words
they are all for you
I'm thinking about taking up a new hobby. I don't know, something physical, like burlsque or bellydancing or something. I'm bored with my physical activities and I kinda want to take up something sexy. I'm the anti-sexy. I'm pretty and I'm cute, but erotic or sexy? Nope. Maybe I could get in touch with that side of me...
I have tried multiple times to directly download my video that I made about me and it totally wont. Le blah.
Like has gotten interesting and I'm excited to see what's just around the bend.
I have tried multiple times to directly download my video that I made about me and it totally wont. Le blah.
Like has gotten interesting and I'm excited to see what's just around the bend.
Do you ever just have those days where everything feels so good? I had to go buy a new battery for my car, but NO biggie really. That's what it's like when you own a vehicle. All day, even during my painful final, I felt like I knew I was doing the right thing with my life. I feel like I chose the right academic path, I feel like I am using my life to the fullest. I am being productive. I am expanding my being beyond that of my yesterday, or even my right now. I am feeling so good. I have a horrible headache, but I just want to cuddle up with my blanket on this couch out on the carport and enjoy the nice cool breeze on this southern autumn night. I may not be in love and I may not be financially stable and I may not be the most popular girl on the block and I may not be the prettiest, or the smartest, or the most fantastic athelete or anything special, but damn, I am a good human being. I am a good person. I'm the sort of person you meet and you feel the impact. I'm sure this all seems so vain, but I think everyone should come to a point where they are just so happy with themselves. Look at what great stuff you have done and what great stuff you want to do. Breathe. Just once. It feels so sweet to breathe.
Smell that woody smell from a near by fire, be it a fireplace or a campfire, no matter. It's that smell you love to have linger on your jacket when you go inside after a nite around the fire. Hear the rushed sound of the wind and the distant sound of the interstate traffic echoing between the ridges. Feel that pleasureable chill roll over what little skin you have exposed. Pull the soft blanket over you face. Bring your cold little fingers up to your warm, mildly chapped lips. Now, just close your eyes. And breathe.
Good night sweets.
Smell that woody smell from a near by fire, be it a fireplace or a campfire, no matter. It's that smell you love to have linger on your jacket when you go inside after a nite around the fire. Hear the rushed sound of the wind and the distant sound of the interstate traffic echoing between the ridges. Feel that pleasureable chill roll over what little skin you have exposed. Pull the soft blanket over you face. Bring your cold little fingers up to your warm, mildly chapped lips. Now, just close your eyes. And breathe.
Good night sweets.
God bless! I hate papers! I have 2 due at 9am and I have to present both papers in class. F-in dumb!
I want to go back to Knoxville, get a little lovings, then just chill with my Smayla Smonster and Pug while eating some kick ass spider rolls! MMMMMMMMMM!
Somebody hold me! I just want to be touched by a human right now. I wish I were home. I wish my mind would function!
I wish people would shut the fuck up! Basketball practice just let out and the players have come back to the dorms to make a ruckus. SHUT UP! DANG!
Thank god this class is almost over. I have Tuesday and Wednesday, then I'm off until next Wednesday. I have to come back to on Tuesday morning for my museum volunteer orientation. Yehe! I'm excited about working with little kids and gingerbread!
Give a little, take a little, just share it all.
If we sleep together, will I like you better? Odds are not, but that's just becaue I'm a bitch. Shut up and do me, and we'll see.
Achoo! Bless you!
Fuck the police!
Buy Stephen Colbert's new book tomorrow!
Finish your damn papers!
I want to go back to Knoxville, get a little lovings, then just chill with my Smayla Smonster and Pug while eating some kick ass spider rolls! MMMMMMMMMM!
Somebody hold me! I just want to be touched by a human right now. I wish I were home. I wish my mind would function!
I wish people would shut the fuck up! Basketball practice just let out and the players have come back to the dorms to make a ruckus. SHUT UP! DANG!
Thank god this class is almost over. I have Tuesday and Wednesday, then I'm off until next Wednesday. I have to come back to on Tuesday morning for my museum volunteer orientation. Yehe! I'm excited about working with little kids and gingerbread!
Give a little, take a little, just share it all.
If we sleep together, will I like you better? Odds are not, but that's just becaue I'm a bitch. Shut up and do me, and we'll see.
Achoo! Bless you!
Fuck the police!
Buy Stephen Colbert's new book tomorrow!
Finish your damn papers!
You don't have to go home, you just can't stay here.......
I'm shocked by the number of girls who are leaving the site.....Dewees.......Tea...... and I noticed that Kovu is gone. WTF?
I think that I have greatly confused lust and love yet again. As I like to tell myself, I love little and lust hard. That pretty much somes it up.
I'm kinda of interested in a girl that I have had a crush on since I was in the 10th grade. Ahhh.... here we go again.
I figured out how to work my camera! Any questions or ideas?
I'm shocked by the number of girls who are leaving the site.....Dewees.......Tea...... and I noticed that Kovu is gone. WTF?
I think that I have greatly confused lust and love yet again. As I like to tell myself, I love little and lust hard. That pretty much somes it up.
I'm kinda of interested in a girl that I have had a crush on since I was in the 10th grade. Ahhh.... here we go again.
I figured out how to work my camera! Any questions or ideas?
