You maybe know that my first crush, arriving here as a member, was Dwam.

That was normal. I felt in love for her lips, her face, her whole body... Really, she's amazing to look at.
I think that she fascinates me. She's like a circus artist, walking on her road, without caring about the rest... A sort of "Tom sawyer". Yeah, really, she's a Tom Sawyer..

I think that, if I have a so strong feeling for her, that's because I'd have loved to live like her. I just think that she found a freedom that I can't find. I like my life, but I know she's closer to my ideal life, than I am.

I suppose you are asking " Why the fuck is she telling this ?"

Click and you'll know why I'm again and again and again ... in love for her face, for her body, for... Her.

WARNING : BIG UPDATE INSIDE

So, first, I'm going to answer or react to questions and tags about my set

1) Tags

- "back dimples" : Nice, I adore it, but I wasn't aware that I had back dimples
- "lipstick" = Yeah, from Dior, thanks to Dwam

... that's strange. When I'm writing this, I realize that some tags was deleted. I saw some ... hurting things...
But I didn't want to delete them. I want to accept every tag, every comment, even worst ones...
So, please, if you see some "hard" comments or tags... Don't care for me
When you will see them, please, add 2 new tags/comments, and make disappear the bad ones

2) Comments & messages

- First, to all that have been concerned by the theme of my set and that told me "thank you" for it,
I'd like to tell : Thanks for having understood me
- LieLock wrote : "fantastic set... very emotional and just the type of sets that SG needs to have..." & boombands wrote : "wow. i think this is what sg is all about. shit that isn't just naked chicks but art, and art makes you think. at least good art does."
>> Thanks to people who said that my set was a really "SG-set" because it's really WHY I'm here...
- Kidego wrote : "Gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous! I don't suppose your single?" > Hahaha. No, I have a boyfriend and I'll marry him
- Warning wrote : "This is absolutely amazing. I love the entire concept....I rarely have any emotions evoked by sets but this was tragedy and beauty mixed wonderfully. Fucking thumbs up to the photographer as well....I am out of words..." >> I'm so so happy that people can feel how much I put in this set. It's huuuudge for me. Thanks to everybody.


- So, about my scare in my neck. I received a lot of messages and comments from people who asked how I had it.
If you want to know it, I copy what I wrote in this blog some months ago...



So, at the end of my secundary school ( nearly 2 years ago ), I had a problem in my neck. It began to swell and to swell again, it hurted a lot ! I couldn't keep my head right.
So, I went to the hospital, where I stayed during one week, with lot of cortisone (I don't know if it's the right english word ) and antibiotics.

After some medical exams, doctors discovered that I have a congenital anomaly.

It's called "fistule branchiale" in french but don't know in english. I'm going to explain..

When you are in the uterus of your mother, at a moment you have a "fish moment" with webbed fingers and the thing in the neck that fishes use to breath. You understand my horrible english ? Right, I continue..
This thing in the neck should close totaly and build your throat, aso.. But I had a really really small problem : a small hole remains deep into my throat. So, nothing that we could see but really deep into it.

If I had continued to live with, I'd have problems again and again, and it would have became really difficult to care it with the time.

So, I decided to accept the operation that was necessary.

So, here, a pic before my operation :



Then : a pic when I stayed 1 week at the hospital ( the first time so )



And now, pics DURING THE OPERATION !

/! WARNING : THESE PICS CAN HURT THE SENSIBILITY !!!!!! /!

First : a pic INTO my throat. You can see the small hole in the left ..

Then : pics of my opened throat. These pics are really horrible .. HAHA

Now, pics taken with my phone, after the operation, at the hospital where I stayed 1 week without eating nor drinking ( haaaaaard !! )







When I saw my scare for the first time, I cried a long long time.. It was so big, so horrible, so ugly.. I was really sad.

Here are a pic some months after the operation. It was the first time I wanted to make pictures of my scare, to accept it as being a part of me.




And finally, I'm alive

My scare now is like on pics of my set




3) What's next ?

- For the moment, I have a self-shot project. But it will be really difficult for me, so.. you'll have to wait but... I'm thinking about !

- I have an idea of set with a great photographer friend... i'd put it in the hopeful section to receive the so beautiful grey t-shirt

- During the SG week-end to Paris, Sweety and I did some kisses and some hugs... and Dwam was there with her camera. What a luck, isn't it ?
We hope you'll see it soon...

- I had a contact with Waikiki and she's usually close to Belgium... So, we could do something in the future ... !!!

- I maybe have my next idea with the great P_Mod if he's ok

- I'd like to do a multi with Dwam but she think that SG won't like my idea Pitty. I would like to try even ...

- I so would like to do a biiiig multi with all the french and belgian SG I know


3) My day in the countryside...

I was at my parent's home this week-end and this afternoon I went walking in forets... ( and I got lost, yeah, but it was nice and I have find my way after 2 hours without any problem )

So, I had the time to do some pics... here are these for you :
















______________________


I just put a video for the Most Honest Video Contest...

Really, I'm a strange girl. I do things that are the worst for me, like showing this video of me completly drunk

Enjoy

Hello !!

I'm the next one to arrive in the frontpage, be ready everybody !!

I'll do some pics tomorrow, just for you, I promise you





PS : I'm so so nervous.. I hope that people who hadn't seen it yet will like it......


EDIT : IT'S ONLINE

I want a pink Archie !

Please, go comment her set, I really love it

Some days ago, I was with my boyfriend and a friend of him, drinking beer, and my boyfriend said : "Hooo ! What if we died your hair tonight ??" .. mmmh.. yeah, why not..

What if I tried to become... BLOND ??






Yeah, it was a baaaad idea

So yesterday I decided to change again ...



I'll show you how it looks today when I'll have do some pics with natural light..

_________


Haha, RED PICS

Sorry but it was really early in the morning, no make up, sunshine in the face, little eyes..









My dreads are a little bit crazy because they are too clean :p Next week, it will be perfect

Hiiiiiii !!

I'm queued !! I don't know if I'll be able to see my face on the frontpage, I don't have my pc with me so.. Can I ask to someone to make a printscreen if you see me in the frontpage ???

It would be SO SO nice


Hiiiiiiiii I'm a suicidegirl !!!!!



EDIT : OKay, I have my computer I'll do the printscreen by myself

EDIT 2 : Hooooo guys and girls, it's THANKS TO YOU if it goes live ! I'm so so happy... Thanks, so so much...

Hey people

I'm TO-TA-LLY exhausted.

Why ? hahaha, I know you wanna know it ! (If you don't, you can leave this blog, because I gonna say it ) ( Yeah, shitty jokes, I'm exhausted ^^ )

Yesterday evening, I helped my boyfriend to find some others informations for his work, we finished at 00:00 and we decided to watch at Basic Instinct, because I had never seen it before. It was great ! ( after the film too, we were inspired by it ) So... when I got asleep, it was 3:00 a.m.
No problem for me, but I had to wake up at 7:30 a.m. because I had to go to Brussels.
It was soooooo sooooo hard to go out from the bed. My god, it's the worst thing ever.

I went to Brussels to meet someone who work at the school I'll go next year. It was stupid, she repeated all that I had read on their website. FUCK ! (I was missing my bed )

Then I went to an art exhibition, it was nice

I'l still looking on internet to find an appartement for Sinnah and me for next year but.. it's hard



But, I'm a little bit sad.. I'd like to feel less alone, but I can't. I need attention, always more, but it's stupid from me. Really stupid, I know it. But I feel... far

I need help

Do you know how I could find how much kilometers there are between Malaysia and Belgium by boat, for transport of exotic woods ?

I need to know it My boyfriend works on life cycle analysis of exotic woods and I want to help him but I don't find this information

Somebody ?


EDIT : I found a program that can help me but now I have to be sure of the boat's route... I suppose it goes by south africa but would like to find some things to be sure. It can concern lots of exported things, not only woods.. So, if you find before me...

______________________________________________________


Ok, it's done I'm a super woman

pffff.... I'd like to have some news of SG

Do you think I'll get pink ? I hope so...

Melting-pot update

- First, I realized that I hadn't show you some pics Dwam did of me during the SG w-e to Paris :





- Then, I'd like to tell you something about yesterday. I went to Brussels with my boyfriend because we wanted to visit some love shops ^^ It was really funny, but I think I was really nervous too. For belgian members, I have to say something : Go to Lady Paname , but don't try to go to Eva Luna : It's far from the station, and when you arrived, exhausted, you realize that there is nothing really nice but some lingerie. The problem is that's really expensive ! Go to Lady Paname, it's cheaper
We bought this : Love Cubes Tarzan & Jane ( Yes, I know, "Tarzan & Jane" seems to be really wild and strange but don't care, it's rather soft and nice, sometimes too soft )

- Today, I've got a lot of things to do... So... "TODOLIST" :

_________________________



Fuck. Some people ( Dwaaaaaaaaaaaam ) think that I look like Avril Lavigne.

I really, REALLY, don't understand why






__________________________



Oh yeah.. I'd just would like to say "Hello" to all my new friends, It's crazy the number of friend requests I had last days... SO, Hello, thanks to be here and for reading me

If you love my set, could you maybe try to share it with your own friends ? I really would like to share it with the biggest number of people possible. ( Heuu.. I think my tense isn't really written in god english but, fuck off, you understood me )

So, please, A little link in your blog, a little "hey, go to see ..." and you'll help me a LOT

I so would like to be in the frontpage, to become a Suicide Girl, and make a looooooot of pics with all these naked french girls..

Hey, Girls, why not a multi.. really really really multi ? I have to write you, I have an idea...

( P_mod ... hahaha, you're going to feel HOT )

_____________________________

Last thing : I'm thinking about a self shot project... Be ready

I just would like to thank you ... I couldn't imagine that people would react so nicely.

I want to write a lot of things, but I just can't. I'm not able to tell you all I have inside me.

Please, know that I thank you for having understood me.

You touched me (or Your comments touched me Thanks to Nikhita )

_____________________________________________________

Something else :

Some weeks ago, I participated in a demonstration with some friends. The organizers wanted to sensitize people in danger of the "extreme right". We were dressed like people who work in offices, with smokings, grey skirts and spectacles ( =sad people ) and we shouted extreme "slogans" against people with dreadlocks, against immigrants, poor people, and to having more policemen, more big shopping centers, ....
We wanted to show to people how dangerous can be thoughts of these politics...
It was really difficult for us, people with dreadlocks, who want more solidarity, to shout these horribles things.
But we did, because it's necessary.

A pic of me at the demonstration :p



(hahaha, amis français, je tenais le portrait de ce cheeeer Sarko, et nous avons hurlé "Sarkozy, bourgmestre ici !!")