PICS
I'm seling prints of my illustrations, I'm on a bit of a creative rampage, so watch this space. I'm selling them in the SG sales group:
also, i shot a set with Lee Gillies, but it's a bed set, and we know how much everyone hates those, so after much deliberation, we've decided not to submit the images, as it's just getting harder to have a set bought these days. it's a shame, because it's my favourite set so far.
i also took dolls house down, to be honest, I had forgotten it was even there. I wish I'd left 'up the garden path' up, as I wish that had gone live so so badly.
I had a really good day with disco and bow yesterday. we almost got killed by crazy bargain shoppers in primark in bond street, and then we came back to the flat and laughed at things on the interwebs.
i'll leave you with more images from lee gillies from a few weeks ago, i love this man:
and i love this girl:
don't forget about my blogs:
http://lyviamodel.blogspot.com/
http://lyviaillustrates.blogspot.com/
this week's been weird.
i learnt:
to make a macchiato, espresso, double espresso, capuccino, mocha, latte, americano, how to make a baby laugh, that i have some awesome friends, that i really can't flirt, that things aren't what i thought they were, i am running out of money, halloumi cheese is addictive, i need people around me, i miss my mum so so much, my dad really can't do emotion, i am not getting better, but i'm not getting worse, lee is my soulmate, i am actually a semi decent driver, and friday nights out with 'the girls' are the most fun i've ever had.
i also set up two blogspots, so go check them out:
http://lyviamodel.blogspot.com/
http://lyviaillustrates.blogspot.com/
life is damn good when you're young and in love.
I've had an incredible year and a bit on SG, and i realise I never celebrated my SG anniversary, but it doesn't mean I forgot. I met some amazing people, photographers, members, hopefuls and SGs and I believe that SG is one of the best things I have ever done.
some of the highlights from my time here:
the pictures i submitted to SG in my application form
i barely recognise myself underneath the backcombed hair and bad foundation, but i remember being so happy, and so determined:
i barely recognise myself underneath the backcombed hair and bad foundation, but i remember being so happy, and so determined.
my first set, and the first time I was ever naked in front of the camera. I got to meet akemi that day, and I was in awe. She was the most beautiful person I'd ever seen up close, and that just made me even more nervous, but incredibly determined.
the night i met bow was pretty unforgettable too. keiko posted that she was having a party, so in an effort to make some new awesome friends, i posted that i'd be driving down if anyone wanted to hop in with me. bow responded and a wonderful friendship blossomed. it all started with a gift of a large princess cake, some strongbow, a few near accidents, a conversation about sex tapes and some maryland cookies and now she's one of my closest friends, and the bravest girl i know.
bow and shiro
It was time for a new set, so I shot again with akemi
but, with no luck in MR this time.
in the meantime, i met kit and the lovely hopeful Sharyn, who got naked all over my couch. I gotta say that was one of my highlights
there was a Brighton meet, and a few lakeside/ bluewater shopping trips
and then there was the charity breast cancer photoshoot, which was amazing
and before I knew it, it was time for another set, this time aided by the very talented ihsanphotography
and again with akemi
and then there was the music video:
and the nativity shoot:
and Brighton Tattoo convention was one of the best weekends of my life, because all of these girls were just incredible. we ate party rings and sold the site with all our hearts.
and i shot my super sexy multi with abbiss
who i fell in love with the moment i met her.
and since then, I'm left with some incredible memories, some of the best friendships i've ever had, and a real community to turn to for support. I am so proud to be a suicidegirl, and this site is the best thing to ever happen to me. so thank you, all of you wonderful wonderful people x
first time, i got so lost, i was 2 hours late, i forgot my heels, got a congestion charge fine, a bus lane fine and smacked someone's wing mirror off.
becuase i was late, i paid half the money for 2 more hours in the studio as we'd used up all our time, and then it took me 3 hours to get home, and i almost ran out of petrol.
second time, i fell over right before the shoot, busted open my hand and my leg, then we decided to use fairy lights, badddd idea. i burnt my skin on the lights, then trod on them, so the whole set was ruined.
then i used pure undiluted food colouring and burnt half my skin off
third time, my sat nav took me through the blackwall tunnel and then back through the rotherhithe, so it took me an hour to drive 6.2 miles, and then i got a 40 pound parking ticket. also, the light broke, so the second lot of photos are unuseable
garr
but a new set is in the pipeline, and i think a couple previews for you beautiful people are in order.
and a couple randoms for good measure:
on another good note,i have a new book in progress:
i have had lots of orders for my last book, i got a distinction in my fmp, i'm exhibiting this month and i have some amazing friends
you're all incredible
i thought i'd spoiler for all the people who are having a good day today
i shot with the very talented lee gillies on monday, i hardly shoot anything anymore, but we shot 2 sets for SG to submit sometime in the future, i'm still basking in the awesomeness of my last set with abbiss going up, thank you so so so much staff, and thank you to all the fabulous members who commented on it, i love that set, and i'm so glad it's going to be there forever.
we alos bought 2 bengal and burmese kittens, they are beautiful, but my cat bimbo isn't too impressed. we've named them dexter and lola
and now some pictures of my bum in the new flat
ciao!
x
they all fall down the following day and shatter. causing you to look like the village idiot, and then forcing you to pin and glue every single on of them back onto said wall, which i just should have done in the first place.
i also spent 107 dollars having my book printed and delivered, because i'd read the website wrong and i thought it only took 1-2 days to get here from when i placed my order, but it turned out it took 3-5 days to print, then 1-2 to be delievered, again, idiot.
this is part of the book:
we put a deposit down on a place in the millenium village this week, it's beautiful and there will be some kind of housewarming in the next few weeks, i'll post details of that when we are settled in
oh, and pictures of my lovely new A3. The only photos i have are the ones i took after we'd paid for it, so it doesn't have my numberplates on here, and it's a hell of a lot cleaner than it is now
bedtime pictures:
i love bow more than anything, i'm so sad she's leaving for SG prom on tuesday, i don't know what i'll do without her 
also...... keep your eyes peeled on the front page on monday 
kisses!!
just to get this out of the way, i have a new multi set in member review with the gorgeous abbiss
you can leave your opinions on that here
i applied to camberwell school of art, i had my interview today. we had to go into a room at 10.30 and leave our portfolios until 2:00, and then they would post a list of people they wanted to interview, and out of 20 people, only 7 of us got interviews, i was so so relieved. i find out in 2 weeks whether i got in or not, fingers crossed!
oh, and i bought an audi a3, it's beautiful!
some new photos:
proper update soon, but for those of you that ask after me, i'm healthier
also, i'm going to hot damn with bow tonight, who else is going?
EDIT: I did a quiz that i stole from viking but i couldn't be bothered to post a new blog
i haven't been doing so well, i've been in and out, in and out, i barely know where i am right now. for those of you who don't know the deal, my last blog covers pretty much everything. it seems redundant to go over it all again, i feel like that's all i've been doing this last month, rehashing the details over and over. i'm pretty sick of the sound of my own voice. i've lost most of my friends, almost lost the love of my life, and i'm pretty sure my family would walk away at this point if they could. i hate how much pain i'm causing them for entirely selfish fucking reasons.
i am too interested in myself, in my own body, and that's never ever been the case. i have a lump in my throat writing that, it's pretty hard to face the truth sometimes, but i need a reality check. i almost lost my boy last night, i almost chose this horrible obsession over him. he asked me to stop, to gain some weight, to be normal again, or he was walking away. i told him to leave.
for the first time in this horrible year, he told me how he really saw me, as a shadow of myself, not as the same girl he fell in love with. i hardly ever laugh anymore. he said that it makes him want to cry, touching me and feeling nothing but bones. he said e misses my boobs, my curves, my smile. he's the one person i needed to hear all of that from, in order to stop, and now he's finally said it, i'm afraid it's too late, i'm afraid i'm too far gone. my body's already failing and if i don't turn it around now, they said i won't be able to walk by the summer. for a 19 year old girl who was probably the healthiest of her peers: never drank, smoked, ate junk food, did drugs and i exercised every day, that's a pretty horrific thought.
but even so, i'm still not stopping. sometimes, i want to smack my self round the head to wake myself up. most days, i don't even feel like i have a problem.
you don't know how much i appreciate all the little messages and comments, words of advice and love and support. it feels incredible to know how many of you care, i just don't feel strong enough to heed those words of advice, it needs to come from inside me, and that's the one place the motivation is lacking. i need to sort myself out. i'm a mess.
bow has been incredible. even thought i don't speak to her as much as i'd like, she's always there for me. she's an incredible friend,a dn i love her very much. i need to prove it to her more.
and to all the rest of you, there are too many to name, you are all so so wonderful
in other news, i took some pictures on le photobooth, and i have some artwork for sale too.
pm me for prices etc(the first 3 are for sale as A1 prints:
couple updates on the book:
and some pictures of me being vain:
happier times will come soon, i will make it happen.xxx
