So I'm sitting here at my salon waiting on my client who swears she is almost here via text but is currently 43 fucking minutes late! I'm torn between saying fuck it and going home or giving her a serious lecture on proper etiquette then going home. Fuck!!!!!

Well that was just awful! It really sucks hurting peoples feelings… I mean nice people that really don’t deserve it. Unfortunately, at times it is necessary. I had to break things off tonight with my boyish friend. It was all getting too much for me. He’s the sweetest thing but so needy. He’s one of those “You complete me” types. I figure I’m whole and complete all on my own. I want a man that can stand next to me not one that stands behind me. He came over and watched a movie with me tonight and now he’s on his way home, all alone and blue as can be. I didn’t even sugar coat it. I simply blurted it out, “I can’t be your girl!” Ugh! I can be such an asshole. At least it wasn’t some long drawn out drama. I’ll have a cup of hot cocoa and feel better in the morning. I have some drag queens coming into the salon tomorrow to get their make-up done. Painting their faces always gives me the giggles. It will be a good day for sure.
Goodnight S.G.! Sweet dreams!

It bums me out when people take advantage of my kindness but it will not discourage me. I'm going to be just as pleasant as always. The meanies won't win!

Adding food coloring to vodka and calling it "punch" might not have been one of my best ideas.

AHHHHHHH!!!!!! The infected are here and they want to eat vagina's!!!!!!!!

I never thought it was possible to be harassed by the police for drunk driving when you are drunk walking. No joke! Becca and I were just minding our own business, hoofing it down the street, when along come the cops in all their red white and blue glory. They pull over, get out of the car, and that's where the game begins.
"Good evening ladies."
"Hey dude!"
"Officer please, my name isn't dude."
"Sure thing man."
The officer shakes his head.
"Where is your designated driver tonight?"
"We don't have one."
"Well I'm pretty sure neither one of you are sober enough to drive."
"Oh I guarantee it! That's why we're not driving."
"Where's your car
"I don't know. Have you seen it?
"This is serious miss. Drunk driving can get you into big trouble."
"Dude, I'm not really following you. Have you been drinking?"
"That's not funny! "
"Becca's laughing so she thought it was funny."
This continued for a good 10 minutes or so before he finally buggered off and hopefully found some real crime. It's moments like these that make me pissed at myself for actually paying my taxes. Is the state of Michigan that hard up for money that they are now trying to arrest drunk walkers?

My new tattoo... Mustachio!

I wish I could clone myself become a lesbian, and date me. If nothing else we would have a fabulous woredrobe.

Why can't you stab stupid people? Especially when they are so hideously deformed by botox that it looks as if they are reentering the earths atmosphere. Stupid AND ugly... i just really lack tolerance for that shit.

No shit, I am fucking trashed! It's 6 in the fucking morning and I've been playing Frisbee since 4am. on Front Street. And I did it in my cherry festival dress. Oh my goodness do I ever feel like a big shinny ball of fabulousity! Hunny fucking bunny's, you just missed the bestest game of 4am. Front Street Frisbee EVER! Too much fun! Too much booze! I traded a man my dress to his tee shirt. Shit! I got naked on Front Street again. Whatever. It was fun and my heart aches for those of you that missed the good time.
I also saw every loser that I ever let put their dick in me. That was way fun too. It's kind of like a growth marker. You were once at that level but you got to move ahead 5 spaces. They hit shoots and I hit ladders. Ha Ha fuckers!
I'm fucking drunk and I must find my bed before I get myself in any more trouble.