I won't wear a collar.

ROFLMAO
Only if you cover the commuting expense.

yes please pick me

I require food (I cook very well) and six hours a day to write. For that...my flesh is yours to command.

im in ... but only if you help me too?

"Pick Me, Pick Me,! (Jumping up and down) Pick Me!"

I don't think I play the slave role very well, but this sounds like it could be fun. But I imagine that stuff doesn't taste very good. Wait, what...

Sounds like a nice position!

You wouldn't do well in the American southwest, hell I was born here and I can't take this heat.
Excellent ass!

You already know I'm in!

how about if I put an ice cube i'm my mouth for tongue baths lol

in my dreams!

ya! i could spray that i'm exhausted just thinking about this "job"

I would love to!

*waves hand frantically* You live close enough to where they shoot Dexter and have met M.C.H. twice now, right? that would be good enough payment for me!