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So I have been through a lot in the past two weeks... I just feel like it is one thing after another... and I am trying to get through it and make the best out of everything... I try to stay positive and put my happy face on....
Where to start where to start??? Well my heath sucks and that alone allows me to feel like I am exhausted 24-7, have no energy and usual have stomach pain.....I have learned to deal with the pain... I am good at dealing... but the no energy and shakes and constantly being cold really isnt fun. I am still getting tests run.... still trying to figure out what it is.... like I said no worries... I have lasted 2 years with it... I will be fine... I just want to be back to my usual self and hope that can happen soon! I miss running around like a complete idiot and being crazy.

Relationships suck.... that is all I am saying on this topic. I put too much of my emotions into everything... I cant help it... that is just how I am. I care sooo much for others even if they dont care back....and because of this I end up getting stomped on and hurt..... or taken advantage of... and it isnt fair... but guess what... I do it to myself. (AS A GREAT AMAZING FRIEND TOLD ME... I JUST NEED TO GROW SOME BALLS AND LEARN HOW TO WORRY ABOUT MYSELF FIRST!!)

So Tuesday night... I was on my way to a photoshoot.... and was on the highway only to have to pull off when my car started making loud noises.... YUP FLAT TIRE.... and how pathetic is it that I didnt even know the first thing to do?? I had no idea what number to call... I certainly have never been taught how to change a tire....and at that moment I realized how dependent on others I truely am....and it was sad.... I need to learn how to be independent ASAP! So about an hour later a cop finally came to my rescue and changed it for me...and attempted to teach me what to do for a next time... which I hope there never is.

(Only good thing that came out of the night was shooting my set!!!! It turned out absolutely fantastic and was so much fun!)

So I drove 40 all the way to work yesterday and all the way home on my spare had to fork out 700.00 to get all 4 tires fixed and my alignment fixed because it was absolutly horrible..... WOW HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME... YOU GET 4 NEW TIRES.... AWSOME!

So then after getting that situated I come home to my dog bleeding everywhere.... not to be gross but it was coming out of her butt. Every time she got up from sitting there was a huge puddle of blood. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh can I just tell you how annxious and in panic mode I was. That doesnt just happen. It was serious. So off to the emergency vet I went haveing a panic attack the whole time... talking to her.... telling her...she had to promise me she would be ok.... Yes I talk to my doggies.. they are my babies.... So the vet just sent her home with a few meds to take in the next few days.... gave her a shot to harden her stools and told me to watch her all night and make sure it didnt get worse... or I would have to bring her in this morning to be hospitalized. Well thank god....whatever they gave her helped... her bleeding stopped and she seemed to be doing much better this morning. They sent her home saying it might just be bloody diareaha.... ummmm first off it wasnt shit...and second off I dont think that much blood comes out when you have diahreaha... who knows.. All I care is she is doing better and I hope she continues to say better! (JUST FOUND OUT SHE HAS PANCREATITIS....SO I WILL KEEP AN EYE ON HER... BUT IT SEEMS TO BE GETTING BETTER!)

Ok so that is my rant of holy shit anxiety----stressed---mentally and physically exhausted past two weeks I have had.

But I do have to say thanks to Shyla for always being here when I need something and for always worrying about me. She truely is a best friend and one that I am thankful for having. We can not hang out and not laugh uncontrolably for hours! So thanks sexy bitch!!! I <3 You! Thanks for cheering me up!

And also to JennaStrange girl u know I <3 you and thanks for always checking in on me! Ba ha ha ha mountain dew and all these bitches and hoes.... you know! Thanks for being awsome!

OK I THINK I AM DONE RANTING NOW! I JUST HOPE SOMETHING GOOD HAPPENS SOON... CAUSE I NEED IT....

OH AND IN OTHER SAD SAD END OF THE WORLD NEWS!!!! ~~~
CLICK HERE TO VIEW!!
THIS BAD BOY OF A SET IS STILL SITTING IN MEMBER REVIEW FOR OVER A MONTH!

Ok now for normal Kraven happy funtimes blog... hahahahh!!!!

I was talking with someone yesterday about numbers and always looking at the clock randomly without thinking and always seeing 11:11 and 1:11. I know a lot of us do this... but we got into a conversation about those numbers meanings and I became very interested. So todays blog is about just that....

Crazy thing is.... I tell you all that the past two weeks have been hard... and I am constantly noticing 1:11 and 11:11 on the clock nonstop.... like way more then I ever have....so read one.... maybe this is a good thing?? hahah!

NUMBERS AND THEIR MEANINGS!!!!

Every number has a certain power which is expressed both by its symbol to denote its representation and by its connection to universal principles. Numbers have relationships with all things in nature, thus making them supremely powerful symbolic expressions.

NUMBER 1 ~ THE SUN
One: One primarily deasl with strong will, positivity, pure energy. The number One reflects new beginnings, and purity. The symbolic meaning of number One is further clarified when we understand One represents both kinds of action: physical and mental. This combined with Ones urgency for new beginnings, we begin to see Ones recurring in our lives indicates a time to exert our natural forces, take action, and start a new venture. One encourages us our action will be rewarded in kind.

NUMBER 2 ~ THE MOON
Two: The symbolic meaning of number Two is kindness, balance, tact, equalization, and duality. The number Two reflects a quiet power of judgment, and the need for planning. Two beckons us to choose. The spiritual meaning of number Two also deals with exchanges made with others, partnerships (both in harmony and rivalry), and communication. Two urges us out of our indecision, calls us to unite with like-minds, and like-ideals. Two asks us to exert our natural flow of judgment to do what is best for our souls.

NUMBER 3 ~ MARS
Three: The spiritual meaning of number Three deals with magic, intuition, fecundity, and advantage. The number Three invokes expression, versatility, and pure joy of creativity. Three is also a time identifier as it represents Past, Present and Future. Consecutive Threes in your life may symbolize the need to express yourself creatively, or consider your present directional path in relation to past events and future goals. Three may also represent promising new adventures, and assurance of cooperation from others whom you may require help. Three typically symbolizes reward and success in most undertakings.

NUMBER 4 ~ MERCURY
Four: The symbolic meaning of number Four deals with stability and invokes the grounded nature of all things. Consider the four seasons, four directions, four elements all these amazingly powerful essences wrapped up in the nice square package of Four. Fours represent solidity, calmness, and home. A recurrence of Four in your life may signify the need to get back to your roots, center yourself, or even "plant" yourself. Fours also indicate a need for persistence and endurance.

NUMBER 5 ~ JUPITER
Five: The spiritual meaning of number Five deals with travel, adventure, and motion. With the highs that come with these attributes, Fives also carry instability and unpredictability, and radical changes. The spiritual meaning of Five draws our attention to the wonder of life, and beckons us to appreciate the perception of chaos all around us. Five has wild vibrations: primitive and erratic. When Five continues to pop up in your life be prepared for some action, like a trip. Remember, trips aren't all necessarily taken physically. Some of the best journey's are taken in the mind and spirit.

NUMBER 6 ~ VENUS
Six: The symbolism behind number Six is legend. With Venus as its ruler, Six represents harmony, balance, sincerity, love, and truth. Six naturally reveals solutions for us in a calm, unfolding manner. We invoke the Six when we need delicate diplomacy when dealing with sensitive matters. The spiritual meaning of number Six also deals with enlightenment; specifically "lighting" our path in areas we require spiritual and mental balance. Sixes beckon us to administer compassion and consciously choose forgiveness in a situation.

NUMBER 7 ~ SATURN
Seven:Sevens, like Threes, deal with magical forces. Sevens deal with esoteric, scholarly aspects of magic. Representative of scholarly activities, mystery, and the focused search for esoteric meanings. Seven deals with the activation of imagination and manifesting results in our lives through the use of conscious thought and awareness. Ruled by Saturn, Seven can represent impractical dreaming, but with a deeper understanding of the aspects of Seven, you can quite deftly utilize its magical vibration to your own benefit.

NUMBER 8 ~ URANUS
Eight: The symbolism backing number Eight deals largely with business, success, and wealth. This is due to the fact that Eight represents continuation, repetition, and cycles. Such elements are seen in arenas where success is obtained simply because of dogged determination and repetition. Also, matters of business and wealth largely depend on cycles to fulfill their manifestation. It's like the snowball analogy: As it continues to roll, in gets bigger and bigger with each revolution. Eight represents that kind of momentum.

NUMBER 9 ~ NEPTUNE
Nine: The spiritual meaning of number Nine bring us to the very height of vibrational frequencies in this number sequence. Nine represents attainment, satisfaction, accomplishment, and our success to achieve an influence in our circumstances. The spiritual meaning of number Nine deals with intellectual power, inventiveness, influence over situations and things. Nine beseeches us to recognize our own internal attributes, and extend these abilities out into the world to make a positive, influential difference.

NUMBER 1: AGRESSION, ACTION AND AMBITION
NUMBER 2: BALANCE, CONTRAST AND OPPOSITE
NUMBER 3: TALENT, VERSATILITY, JOVIALITY
NUMBER 4: STABILITY, SOLIDITY, ENDURANCE
NUMBER 5: EXPANSION, ADVENTURE, TRAVEL
NUMBER 6: TOLERANT, DEPENDABLE, SINCERE
NUMBER 7: MYSTERY, STUDY, KNOWLEDGE
NUMBER 8: SUCCESS, OPPURTUNITY, STRENGTH
NUMBER 9: UNIVERSAL INFLUENCE

(ALL THIS INFORMATION WAS TAKEN FROM: http://www.whats-your-sign.com/spiritual-meaning-of-numbers.html)