SuicideGirl: Jordan
suicidegirl

Jordan likes pete doherty.

I’m private
 
OCTOBER 13, 2005 @ 11:39 AM




Mmmmmm, I’m smoking a honey cigarette, I’m in pink thongs, watching the rain fall, sipping my cappuccino, listening to tegan and sara, cozier than a fluffy pussy in the lap of a fuzzy pussy………it’s a beautiful day.
For Halloween I’m going as Matilda from The Professional. I will either carry a huge plant or a glass bottle of milk. TBD. Who wants to be my Mr. Leon??
Purrrrrrrrr, I feel like such a pussy cat today.
Here’s more post jerk off reading material as you folk smoke and catch your breath…

Here’s more Demonic.
***DEVON***

Proper etiquette is not playing with your food. I wanted to tell Betsy that. How could she order The Wild Dorade and just sit and pick at it with her fork.
“Sweetie,” I said, with just a touch of coldness, “Are you not used to this type of food?”
“What?” she looked up at me, sounding and looking like an amnesia patient waking up for the first time to discover their memory completely vanished. I felt like mocking her she sounded like such an idiot.
“But it’s just a salad,” she said sadly. “They made it sound like something more on the menu.”
“That’s because it isn’t just a salad.” I felt like slapping her so hard. “You can order something else, its fine.”
“But I don’t want to send anything back.”
“You don’t have to send it back. I’ll pay for it, its fine.” I picked up her menu as if it were different than mine. I looked at the meats, figuring that bit she could understand, no problem. “How about the Rabbit of the Muscovy?”
“The what?” she looked up at me again, sad eyes that couldn’t comprehend anything outside her single-parenting bubble.
“I think you should try the rabbit. I love rabbit.” I held up a hand to grab Sarah’s attention.
“Is something wrong?” Sarah asked, looking down at the untouched plate in front of Becky.
“Oh, no, we would just also prefer the rabbit,” I said. The more we ate, the more she’d drink. I ordered Sherry next.
“My goodness, you’re a drinker,” she said. I just grinned. She was too young to be saying things like ‘my goodness,’ didn’t she know that? Sarah trotted off. She seemed bubbly, at least from the way she walked. I kept imagining her straddling me, bobbing up and down on my cock. I bet that’s how she liked to fuck. I’m not sure how Becky liked to fuck, I’m pretty sure she did it a lot, though. Just then she tilted her head and took on a rather complex expression.
“What are you thinking about right now?” she asked.
“Oh, just about earlier, how I was acting.” I shifted in my seat some, sliding down a bit and folding my arms across my chest. This way, even though what I was saying may be sweet, my body language didn’t put off any vulnerable vibes. “I was a jerk, you were right.”
“Oh, please, I’m sensitive, especially right now. It’s okay, really.” I nodded, she was repeating herself now, and I wanted her to shut up already. I was just trying to ease my way back into getting laid. “I hope it’s okay if…I just go home after this. Next time we can go for a swim.”
“Oh, sure, that’s fine. I just want you to relax.” I patted her hand. I felt like cutting it off, but I had a better idea; much better. I picked up the menu. “We should get desert, too. You really haven’t lived until you’ve had Café Wrought chocolate moose pie.”
“Yeah, I was thinking about trying a glass of the Steel Magnolia 12 , too.” I made a face, but quickly recovered. 12 was actually the price of the drink. How stupid she was. Sarah came back with our rabbit after a long trying silence hung over our table. I entertained myself wondering how Nicole was coming along, kept up in her bedroom. I kept wondering what was going to come of her pregnancy. I couldn’t wait to see the fight go down between her and my dad. But most of all, of course, I looked forward to tomorrow, to finally getting my hands on Marhollow. He was such a punk. He always had that look on his face, stubborn, like he’d always get his way. We altered that a little when we made him watch us torture Jesse. Maybe, hopefully, he didn’t know about Jesse’s death yet, and I could tell him that tomorrow when we torture him. I looked down at the grilled rabbit and smiled.
“Can I please have a Steel Magnolia 12?” Becky asked Sarah. I tried not to laugh, when a laugh did pop up, I tried to cover it up as a cough.
“Sure, hon,” was all Sarah said before she quickly left again. Becky gave me an unkind eye.
“Did you just laugh at me?”
“No,” I said. “I just got choked up. Okay,” I said, starting over, seeing how she wasn’t going to believe me. I wanted her to believe me, more than that; I wanted her to like me before my big blow. This was beginning to feel like a full time job. It was a fucking date, why was I trying so hard? It had become a game, I guess, it had become addictive to hurt her, make her feel better, hurt her again. It was so easy to do. “Honestly, I was thinking of something funny that happened to me the other day, your drink just reminded me of that.”
“What?”
“I said your drink reminded me of it.” I understood what she meant by what, I was just buying time so I could figure out what the funny thing was that happened to me was going to be.
“No, I mean what happened?”
“Oh, my sister was watching that movie, Steel Magnolias, I thought it was funny, that’s it.”
“You thought it was funny?” Her face lit up. She looked like an entirely different person now.
“Well, yeah.”
“So, there is a soft side to you.”
“Yup. Try your rabbit,” I suggested. She smiled and the entire mood of the restaurant seemed to change.
“Mmm, this isn’t bad, actually.” This isn’t bad…she had no idea. She didn’t know anything about fine dining.
“I’ll be right back. I’m going to visit the restroom.”
“Oh, okay.” She picked up her wine and gulped. I left never intending to return. As I headed toward the bar I thought about how funny it would be to chop off her head and Marhollow’s and switch them like I used to do with my sister’s Barbie dolls. I wanted to do that, I bet we could. I could already see Clyde’s face when I mentioned it. He’d be silent and still at first, his eyes widening and his lips parting. He’d be on the brink of saying, “Man, have you lost your mind, dude?” Then his winner grin would pop up, he’d slap me on the arm and tell me how much I ruled. He could even get the surgical tools we needed from his old man, I bet. My mind went back to Becky. This whole thing had gone on long enough. What would she do when she was stuck with the bill? She’d have to clone ten of her and have all ten of her work her job for ten years and not be able to cover the bill.


EL SUICIDO LOCO

Previous

PAGE: 

1 | 2

Next

Comments
charlemagne

charlemagne

Battle Creek, MI
May 2005

OCT 13, 2005 12:32 PM

I kinda miss my pipe. On the other hand, it didn't do much for my health. Twain said something like, "It doesn't matter how long you live, but how well you live." Well, I got to the point where living well interfered with living well. Darn! Even coffee got in the way of living well. Enjoy it while you can!

Little pussies, on the other hand, never interfered with my health. Only their husbands.

[Edited on Oct 13, 2005 9:27PM]

Mercie

Mercie

SUICIDEGIRL

Connecticut, USA

OCT 13, 2005 01:00 PM

I love the halloween costume idea. I think the plant is my vote for your accessory.

jimmieknuckles

jimmieknuckles

Morrisville, PA
August 2004

OCT 13, 2005 01:09 PM

hhhmmm tegan and sara huh, yeah that killed the mood for me

jimmieknuckles

jimmieknuckles

Morrisville, PA
August 2004

OCT 13, 2005 02:00 PM

i was thinking more of a nina simone day, but i guess thats close enough

tmronin

tmronin

Brooklyn, NY
February 2004

OCT 13, 2005 04:34 PM

hi rockstar!

how are you?

smile

oh oh oh! go with the plant.

[Edited on Oct 13, 2005 7:38PM]

hellblazer

hellblazer

I'm lost
February 2005

OCT 14, 2005 12:03 PM

Damn you and your talent! wink

Do you ever get tired of my telling you how much I love your writing...?

Wendy

Wendy

SUICIDEGIRL

Israel

OCT 14, 2005 01:35 PM

oh jesus. honey cigarettes, pink thongs and tegan and sara? will you marry me?

i saw them last weekend and tegan was working the merch table. i wanted to buy a shirt and we couldn't figure out what size and she looked down and said "well we have a bit of a boob factor." i was like "um.. did tegan just look at my boobs? holy shit mother."

onemorepanic

onemorepanic

Long Beach, NY
August 2004

OCT 14, 2005 10:02 PM

I believe I'm disqualified for the Leon role knowing that I've never actually caught the flick. Heavily recommended for what seem like centuries. Verbose details of pedophile love for Natalie. Me like OK I'll peep it.

Dig the tale, and pardon the association but it gave me feelings of Bret Easton Ellis, in the characters own outward descriptions. At most.
Good or bad thing?
Well depends on who we speak to.

Jena

Jena

New York, NY
June 2003

OCT 15, 2005 12:24 AM

Turbo mama,
Ughh...yeah, been a lil rough here. I gave him his walking papers. I guess it's almost harder on me when I have the choice to call the shots. It's good and it's bad. Makes me almost appreciate the original psycho roommate (and she was NUTS) b/c she didn't get unbearable for a while and even she knew when to back down. But maybe I can't cope NOW b/c of how much I put up with her.
I gave him his walking papers.

Meh. What's the good word?

I'm totally sick, too. blackeyed

Love,
Weary-Peas

Hyde

Hyde

HOPEFUL

Brooklyn, NY

OCT 15, 2005 02:56 PM

Yea, that rockstar's a tool. I see you've got some correspondence, maybe he saw our correspondence. Doesn't want to fuck with his "in" with the already SG. Pfffft, his shit is sub-par anyhoo.

What are you doing for Halloween (hence the costume)?

I don't know, what I want to be yet.

Sounds like you had a comfy day to yourself, I'm still sickypoo. Me no likey be sickypoo.

Good reading helps though

>; }

Jena

Jena

New York, NY
June 2003

OCT 15, 2005 08:27 PM

What!? That wolfie is smiling so proud and happy!!! biggrin
I guess I should do a Secretary over the desk for you, I'm afraid b/c I am still terribly ill and blah. Of course all the smoking I'm sure does not help. confused

Apple_Addict

Apple_Addict

Bronx, NY
March 2005

OCT 16, 2005 07:53 AM

any word on getting your tattoo? blush biggrin

Hyde

Hyde

HOPEFUL

Brooklyn, NY

OCT 16, 2005 09:05 PM

HAHAHAHA!!!!

Actually I used to work for Ricky's . . . For a short while I had the title of "Ricky's personal assistant" . . . Yes, there really is a Ricky and no he's not gay or a drag queen. Do to legal reasons I'm not really supposed to talk about it but, I feel for that company what I'd feel for the opportunity to exfoliate my poon tang with sea salt and repeatedly go down a waterside filled with lemon juice doing a split whilst naked. (I liked Ricky though).

Fabio was doing a promotion for a hair removal wax thing and I was recruited to be one of his "body guards" while all the old ladies groped him posing for photos with their newly waxed red angry eyebrows. He is indeed a creepy man. I was wearing my bitch boots (the ones in my "just goofing" set thing) which make me 6'5" . . . so needless to say I stood out. The guy was staring me down like he wanted to eat me for lunch as I walked around the store. He asked ME to pose for the picture. That's when I realized he wanted a feel of my sweet sweet dirty pillows. He was straining to get his arm around that far and was actually caressing the side swell of my breast with his fingers. When the picture was done I ran off screaming FABIO COPPED A FEEL OF MY BOOB!!!! I actually found that kinda flattering even-though it still makes him a creep.

Jena

Jena

New York, NY
June 2003

OCT 17, 2005 01:37 AM

Ever clean things like lightswitch plate covers, or the edge of the door right by the knob and turns out those things actually are not charcoal grey or black? Amazing. Just spit on the thumb, it's like Mr. Clean.

I swear off of fecal detail. Only my own and Gitsie/Lourdes'--that's it! puke

Ahhhhh....thank you. kiss I fought a long time for it on Ebay, you would think they would be easier to find with Jerry spreading his asshole for every mall, etc. I have a lovely Jackass one too. Like to wear them together and feel romantic. biggrin I mean, brutal.



Feeling better. How about you?
<3,
P
kiss kiss kiss



[Edited on Oct 17, 2005 4:39AM]

Wendy

Wendy

SUICIDEGIRL

Israel

OCT 17, 2005 09:17 PM

well you may be kind of jealous of me then, because cain had her fingers all up in my mouth earlier this afternoon..... shes one of my women. i luff her. we should have a 3 person wedding. that would be hot.

PreviousNext
Past
OCTOBER 2005

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

15

16

17

18

19

20

21

22

23

24

25

26

27

28

29

30

31

SEPTEMBER 2005

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

15

16

17

18

19

20

21

22

23

24

25

26

27

28

29

30

AUGUST 2005

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

15

16

17

18

19

20

21

22

23

24

25

26

27

28

29

30

31

JULY 2005

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

15

16

17

18

19

20

21

22

23

24

25

26

27

28

29

30

31