SuicideGirl: Jeckyl
suicidegirl

Jeckyl The drug in me is you...

I’m private
 
NOVEMBER 15, 2012 @ 06:45 AM


Hello hello everybunny!!

I suppose it is now time for that long overdue update I promised.

Where to begin…

Well recently my sister had her traditional wedding.
This is a bit confusing because they're not technically married yet. In western culture, we'd say they’re engaged.
So let me try explain the process of African marriages to you.
Generally, the process of trying to get married can take up to a year. But, because my sister married a German and it costs a lot to fly his family down here, they condensed the procedure into 3 days, omitting a few of the normal traditions.

In African culture, when a man wants to marry a woman, he pays what we call "lobola", or "the bride price".
This is basically his way of thanking her parents for raising her.
It’s generally set at 12 cows. The value of each cow is determined by the quality of the woman he intends to marry.
So, some examples of things that would make a girl more expensive would be how well educated she is, if she comes from a good family, if she's well-brought up, and if she’s a virgin.
The virginity part is a big deal.
If she lost her virginity to the man she's marrying, he's made to pay "damages" for having sex out of wedlock.
Things that would make a girl cheaper would be if she has children, if she's uneducated or if she has a questionable reputation.
My parents didn't really charge my brother-in-law for my sister's worth because it'd be too expensive.
Another reason for paying lobola is to see how ready the man is financially for marriage. The reasoning behind this is that if he can't afford to pay lobola, he won't be able to afford supporting his new family.

So that's lobola, the first step.
The man's uncle’s come over to the woman's house, to meet her uncles and they start the negotiations.
Taking all the above mentioned factors into account, the agree on a price. Once this has been paid to the family, the couple is considered to be married.

The second step is that we call "ukhuhlabisa wabakhonyana".
Please, don’t try to pronounce that.shocked
It's basically a celebration welcoming the new groom into the bride's family.
Traditionally, a sheep is slaughtered and you invite the bride's entire extended family over to meet the new groom.
The groom's family guys blankets for all the elders of the bride's family and these are presented to them in a traditional ceremony.
Both families are supposed to wear their traditional gear.
Once the blankets have been given to the elders, the bride's father is presented with a coat and a hat (I've no idea why) and the bride's mother with something of their tradition.
Then the groom's family calls out the bride (who is supposed to remain unseen the entire day up until this point) and present her with their traditional wear as a way of showing their acceptance of her into their family.
After that there's yet another celebration welcoming the bride into the groom’s family where this entire process is repeated for the groom’s side, we skipped that.

And then FINALLY there’s the official marriage celebration.
Now we somehow managed to condense this entire process into 3 days, I've no idea how.confused
My favourite day by far was the "engagement party".
My sister wanted the best photographer so, naturally, we got the ever lovely Talamia.
The pictures came out so great!

This is our new family

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My new siblingsbiggrin

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And the happy couplelove

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Aren't they just adorabubble?blush


After the wedding, my sister and brother-in-law went to Cape Town for a week and our families went on a little holiday up north.
It was unbelievably hot!!!!

But I had a great time with my new siblings, whom I happen to love very dearly.

My new sister and I got these matching bracelets.

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We did a lot of hiking and saw so many beaituful places, it was mindblowing.
The natural world is such a beautiful places, it almost makes me want to cry.

This is Mapungubwe

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And, my favourite, Blyde River Canyon..

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I was so sad to see my new family go but I know I’ll be seeing a lot of them in the very many years to come.

While we're still on the love vibes, I'd like to give you this weeks serial killer feature:

Killer Couples!!


SPOILERS! (Click to view)

I hate cliché's so I’m not going to bore you with Bonnie and Clyde. That's such a yawnfest.

Here's my top 5 killer couples of all time.

1. Paul and Karla Bernardo
Because nothing says "I love you" like a fresh corpse.

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Story snipet:
Paul was very annoyed that Karla was not a virgin when he met her. It was, therefore, from his point of view, her responsibility to make it possible for Paul to take the virginity of Karla's pretty younger sister Tammy without her knowledge or consent. Once Karla accepted that logic, the rest was easy, even the idea of videotaping the whole thing seemed to make sense to her. After all, videotaping was a way to remember important events.

2. Fred and Rose West


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Frederick Walter Stephen West (29 September 1941[1] – 1 January 1995), was a British serial killer. Between 1967 and 1987, he alone, and later, he and his wife Rosemary, tortured, raped and murdered at least 11 young women and girls, many at the couple's homes. Rosemary West also murdered Fred's stepdaughter (his first wife's biological daughter) Charmaine, while he was serving a prison sentence for theft. The majority of the murders occurred between May 1973 and August 1979 at their home in 25 Cromwell Street, Gloucester.

The pair were finally apprehended and charged in 1994. Rose West was jailed for life, in November 1995, after having been found guilty on 10 counts of murder. Fred West was never convicted of any murders, however, as he had committed suicide while on remand 10 months earlier. Their house at Cromwell Street was demolished in 1996 and the space converted into a landscaped footpath, connecting the street to St. Michaels Square.


3. Michael and Suzan Bear

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This guy was hoooooooootttttlove
But mostly I admore the love between these two. Awfrown

James Clifford Carson (aka Michael Bear Carson) (born 1950) and Suzan Barnes Carson (born 1942) were serial killers reported to have been active in several countries and regions in the late 1970s and early 1980s - particularly, in the San Francisco Bay Area.

They were involved in the counter culture movement. Their crimes emerged from a shared missionary philosophy to exterminate individuals they believed to be "witches". The pair reportedly kept a list of targeted individuals including celebrities and political figures such as Johnny Carson and then-president Ronald Reagan.

4. Charles Srarkweather and Caril-Anne Fugate

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Granted Caril was young when this happened but her abandonment of Charlie makes me hate hermad

Story snipet:
In 1958, nineteen-year-old Charles Starkweather was desperate. Desperate to marry his jailbait girlfriend. Desperate to make some money for himself so he wouldn't be broke every day of his life. Desperate to get out of the Nebraska town where everyone had figured him for a loser.

He and Caril Fugate embarked on a murder spree that horrified the country. This was the country that had elected Eisenhower and Nixon for a second term in 1956 and where the FBI's J. Edgar Hoover was firmly entrenched as the national policeman. This was also a country that was undergoing unsettling cultural changes. Frightening and offensive symbols of rebellion emerged and thrived: Elvis Presley, James Dean and the whole rock 'n roll culture focused on a new generation that challenged the status quo of the sterile 1950's.

5. Mira Hinley and Ian Brady



I'm not really a fan of their MO but that tape of the screaming girl?
Legendary.In a bone-chilling kinda way.

The Moors murders were carried out by Ian Brady and Myra Hindley between July 1963 and October 1965, in and around what is now Greater Manchester, England. The victims were five children aged between 10 and 17—Pauline Reade, John Kilbride, Keith Bennett, Lesley Ann Downey and Edward Evans—at least four of whom were sexually assaulted. The murders are so named because two of the victims were discovered in graves dug on Saddleworth Moor, with a third grave also being discovered there in 1987, over 20 years after Brady and Hindley's trial in 1966. The body of a fourth victim, Keith Bennett, is also suspected to be buried there, but despite repeated searches it remains undiscovered.



At the beginning of my last blog, I left you all a piece of a puzzle.
I realize that some people thought I was telling you all that I’m crazy but I wasn't. O.o
Anyway, here's another piece...

Personality theories: The study of personality is based on the essential insight that all people are similar in some ways, yet different in others.For example, all people learn, yet people learn different things, in different ways, and to different extents. There have been many different definitions of personality proposed. Most contemporary psychologists though would agree on the following definition:
Personality is that pattern of characteristic thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that distinguishes one person from another and that persists over time and situations.



That's it for mow.
I love you all!!kiss

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Comments
Caia

Caia

SUICIDEGIRL

Portugal

NOV 15, 2012 06:57 AM

Love your blogs, and this one specifically starting with the loving marriage ceremony to the "loving" murderers smile

Nafahamu

Nafahamu

United Kingdom
August 2012

NOV 15, 2012 07:38 AM

Great blog and the happy couple look great together!

Only one comment and please don't take it the wrong way. Not all African countries have the same formalities and can take a day or two or maybe a week, it all depends on the tribe I suppose.

Just thought I'd add that because I know when people reading about Africa always look at it as if it's one big country and don't realise the cultures change from country to country and then tribe to tribe.

Happy blogging and loving the articles.

Zebrah

Zebrah

HOPEFUL

Columbus, OH

NOV 15, 2012 08:04 AM

your so insiprational and i love learning more about your culture it looks like it was a beautiful ceremony you looked great! and speaking of lover sieral killers you have to watch nuturl born killers you would ADORE IT

Fische

Fische

HOPEFUL

United Kingdom

NOV 15, 2012 08:21 AM

^^ what Zebrah said is basically what I was going to say. And if you have not seen Natural Born Killers, with the Interest you have with serial killers, you must watch it! It's one of my favourite films.

Ryker

Ryker

SUICIDEGIRL

Maryland, USA

NOV 15, 2012 08:21 AM

Haha I love that this started with an amazing recap of your sisters wedding and ended with murderous couples! You're adorable kiss

Sif

Sif

HOPEFUL

Canada

NOV 15, 2012 08:49 AM

wicked pics kiss

urietorbi

urietorbi

Germany
February 2009

NOV 15, 2012 09:59 AM

Always a joy to read your blogs.
Your family should have insisted on lobola - flying in 12 cows from Germany wink

666Hostile666

666Hostile666

USA
September 2012

NOV 15, 2012 11:13 AM

Cool!

Juno106

Juno106

Brooklyn, NY
January 2003

NOV 15, 2012 01:00 PM

<3

Onyksi

Onyksi

HOPEFUL

South Africa

NOV 15, 2012 04:56 PM

Aaah those wedding photos are lovely! You look so pretty, and your sister and brother-in-law look so happy! biggrin

btflday777

btflday777

Bethesda, MD
July 2008

NOV 15, 2012 05:12 PM

Congratulations to your sister and brother in law! Thank you for sharing the very informative wedding procedures, great details.
Beautiful pictures of your family!

PaulNikon

PaulNikon

Palm Bay, FL
February 2003

NOV 16, 2012 04:32 PM

Most fascinating thing I have read all week.

Traditional African Weddings and Serial Killers rarely appear together.

Vixiee

Vixiee

HOPEFUL

Phoenix, AZ

NOV 16, 2012 07:03 PM

This was the most interesting and intriguing blog I've ever read! LOVE IT! biggrin

rwdiscord

rwdiscord

I'm lost
December 2011

NOV 17, 2012 11:04 AM

That looks like amazing fun

Yaridovich

Yaridovich

Brazil
June 2012

NOV 17, 2012 05:16 PM

Interesting to see how marriage happens in different cultures... I knew this (that marriage is different for different cultures), but I had no idea about these details about marriage in the african culture... Really interesting indeed. smile

All the best for your sister and her husband!

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