What's up everyone? Things are getting better at work, life is going back to normal and I will update you with a real blog soon, I promise! Hugs and kisses!

Okay ready? It's been a bit of time since the initial reason for my last blog, and things are starting to get better. So, what happened, you ask? Well, my boss got fired, partially because of me, but really because of his own actions. What complicates matters is that he was my friend as well as my boss. Ok, he wasn't really my friend, or else he would never behave the way he did towards me or put me in the position to get him fired. My now ex-boss was a hard worker, but a terrible manager. He ignored all of the important issues critical to making our workplace run effectively, lied to me about several issues in order to cover his ass, and allowed people to do whatever they wanted because he was afraid of confrontation. He would just do thier jobs for them rather than deal with the issue. Oddly, he did yell and scream at all of those who he was close to that actually did their job--so basically, if he got close to you, he became comfortable enough to be an asshole to you, but if he had to actually do his job and delegate responsibility or set consequences for someone's actions, it never got done. He had crazy mood swings and bursts of odd behavior which led me to believe he was bi-polar. To top things off, before he got hired, I was up for promotion to his position and was overlooked for reasons that have nothing to do with my job performance. So, it was brought to my attention that in addition to all of this, he was illegally changing our timekeeping in order to save money. Nothing huge, but 5 or 10 minutes here or there. I warned him several times, but he ignored me.
One morning, my friend and co-worker was pissed because all week long our boss had been particularly crazy and moody. (She was also friends with our boss until he and his partner broke up...who is my co-worker's best friend... I know I know..I sound like a teenage asshole..just follow me here people.) She started telling me about something he had done the day before, when he comes running out of his office screaming at us, which errupts into her yelling back at him about his illegal timekeeping practices. Gasp! Silence.
At this point, I had been anxious and nervous all week. I was strongly considering quitting. I went downstairs in an almost trance-like state, near ready to quit, found the VP of our company, asked to speak to her and immediately started crying. I was just exhausted. My co-worker was called down after I left, questioned, and then my boss. He was sent home, ans subsequentially fired.
You would think I was happy with the results, but this was just the start of my problems. I felt incredibly guilty and did not want this to turn out this way. Despite everything, I had been friends with this person for four years. It was not my plan to get him fired. It felt like he had died...we were just never going to see him again! So de ja vu-my boss is gone, I am once again assuming sole responsibility for my department, being overworked, exhausted and given no assistance. I don't complain, I go above and beyond to prove myself. I make mention of the fact that I am interested in moving up after hearing that interviews are starting, but feel like an opportunistic cunt for doing it. I had to mention it fast though, because of what had happened the last time. I am positive that I will not be overlooked-in fact, my entire department backs me up and tells our bosses that I am the right person for this job. Well...it turns out that they have already filled the position and didn't even think to interview me--10 years with a company, nothing but success and not a single issue with anyone in our building. Once again, I am demoralized and basically told that no matter what I do, I will never go anywhere with this company. I tell our boss my feelings, honestly but without bitterness or topo much emotion, and she assures me she understands and that the decision has nothing to do with my work performance, blah blah bullshit don't quit or we're fucked blah blah....and promises me a raise if I stick it out 'till review time. She even tells me that corporate loves me and that I do a great job. So, is it personal? WTF? Who cares?
My new boss starts. She is definitely qualified to be a good manager, but is not the kind of person who gets her hands as dirty as I do. I have to train her to do everyhing I am doing, while doing my job. I am trying to deal, but I sent my resume out to several spots, and am being patient. School will be done soon enough and I will move forward. She isn't that bad, but I know that I deserve better than this. My workplace has left me feeling like I am a lower life form because I don't come from the background of our clienetele. It seems that surface bullshit is everything to them...I dress extremely professionally and always act as such, but they know I'm not part of thier little club of waspy cunts... well good luck without me, because if I don't get more money or get a better job offer, that place is going to sink without me.

It's been emotionally trying and I felt like a loser and a failure this last few weeks. Clearly this place has been detrimemtal to my self -esteem. So since I need to work, what to do? I am picking myself up, dusting myself off and moving forward now. Fuck these people. I am one of the hardest working people that they have. To show no value for that is a reflection on them, not me. Let them learn the hard way--I am stepping back and letting my "new boss" take the reins. She has no idea what she's in for.

Thanks for letting me rant.. this concludes this week's edition of digruntled worker blog!

I have had an incredibly difficult two weeks. Work has been stressful, heartbreaking and exhausting. I am balancing all of this with school and trying to live a normal life. I am on the brink of breaking down from nervous exhaustion....so much in fact that I don't have the energy to go into details. I've been working 6 day work weeks and need a break. I'll go into specifics over the weekend, but for now, I ask for your support, strength and positive vibes.

Thank you so much to everyone who commented on my set, and to staff for putting me on the front page today! It's been a long time....I am really pleased with this set and am thrilled at the reception it has had. It means a lot to me to be a part of SG, and I am so happy that Brooklyn and I are being recognized.
I kept it a secret that my set was going up so that all of you woud be surprised ...but I did a happy dance across my livingroom when I found out the other day!
Thank you everyone, really. It is a big deal to me, and I feel lucky that SG members are so awesome and supportive.

Note to self--do not sleep in eye makeup!!! I usually take stellar care of my skin before bed, but last night I fell out on the couch with smokey black eyeshadow, liner, etc. on my eyes...woke up today with red, itchy and irritated "eyes". (They no longer qualify as actual eyes, lol.) Where is Ben Stein with my eye drops?
So how was your weekend everyone?
I had a delicious burger, went to a friend's party at a place in town that also hosts local punk/hardcore bands and hung out with friends I have not seen since high school...some of them did not recognize me. I used to look like Daria crossed with Jeanine Garoffolo--short bobbed hair, glasses, dark lipstick, etc...and if you don't know who either of them are, than you are probably way younger than me. The only thing that has not changed is that I am super short (5'1"), and have a very nasal voice. Think Kathy Griffin. I think for my next blog, I am going to post some old pictures! I need to scan them onto the computer first.
My tattoo is still itchy after almost two weeks. WTF? It looks great and healed really nicely, but the itching is annoying. My next piece, which I am already planning, will hopefully be a cover up of the large sleeve-y thing on my left arm. There are several things about it that I don't like. When I had the background colors added, I showed the artist a picture of one of Rigel's tattoos, and said I wanted a pattern-type background similar to that. I also expressed that I wanted the small flame on one of the leaves covered. Needless to say I did not get what I asked for. I'm not sure how much can even be covered or fixed. I don't hate it, so if it isn't possible, I will live.
Thank you to everyone for your continued love here on the site. I am thrilled with the response to my latest set...it's been a long time since I've hit the FP and I am seriously excited and crossing my fingers with this set because it is doing so good! You are all so sweet and I want you to know I read all of your messages and comments--sometimes I can't respond to all of them, but know I am happy to receive them! I love being a part of SG and think that it is amazing how the community has thrived here for so long, and evolved into something so huge. It's an honor to be a part of that. You all make it what it is!

Check out my latest creation with Brooklyn...I hope you enjoy it! All By Myself. I was not technically all by myself here, but we were pretty alone upstairs in the room that Perry slept in that weekend...which I dubbed the creepy quaker farm room. I love it!
One of my favorite pictures in the set:

What's yours?

Yay!!! My set is up, and I am so excited to see all of your comments--they really do make me super happy! I had a very long work day, followed by a strenuous workout at the gym, which left me pretty exhausted. I came home, fed my pet iguana, cooked up something for dinner and plopped down to see how the set was doing--and I just smiled from ear to ear! You guys are so sweet...know that I thank each of you sincerely.
Hopeful Liya's set also went up today, which was cool because we shot our sets at the same location, over a really fun weekend upstate with lots of pretty SG ladies, food, wine and fun. Give a huge round of applause to Brooklyn for shooting my set, organizing that awesome trip and doing all of it while recovering from walking pneumonia!

If you haven't checked it out yet, here is the link.

click here for boooobies


Thanks darlings!

xoxoxo,
Fabrizia

I just realized that my set moved up in the queue and will be in member review on January 26th! Brooklyn shot this set while we were at our super fun filled upstate NY getaway weekend a few months ago. You can go back and read about it a few blogs ago if you like... We had a blast and I really think it shows in all of the sets that came out of that weekend. I'm really excited about this one because I think it's the best thing I've shot, and I'm happy that Brooklyn did such a great job producing this. I love the girls here and am so lucky to be a part of SG..... Here's a little sample of the set coming up. I tried to post a different pic but it only showed up halfway because of the size. I'm really stoked about it!

You'll be able to check out the whole thing in just five days!

xoxo

My new tattoo! I am so happy! I got it done today in just under four hours. It is so satisfying to have it done in one sitting. Red Rocket, NYC. Kyle Sajban:






My next blog will also feature pictures...from my upcoming set scheduled to go into MR on 2/2/12! Stay tuned for some sexy preview pics!
xoxoxo

Happy new year to everyone! I hope all of your holidays have been relaxing and fun. I had a really hectic December but Christmas was, for the first time, drama free, fun and personally fulfilling. I made Christmas dinner for my family as a gift and we decided that this year was a no gift year. Everyone was so thankful and raved about my cooking! I made a prime rib crusted with garlic and breadcrumbs (helps keep the moisture in!), homemade mac and cheese, a brownie cheesecake and some delicious veggies. I really do love cooking for people. I spent my NYE at home, under a blanket watching t.v. (I know..lame!) but I did get to go out and dress up the night before at a really cute 30's themed party in the city, with Brooklyn. There were so many fabulously retro people there! Lady--if you're reading this send me pics!

I'm taking a short break from school right now, and taking stock of my life. I'm at a stalemate at work. I'm actually very sad and depressed about this. I asked for a raise today, after being there for 10 years and making less than I should-and got told that there was no possibility because my company cannot afford to spend any money on increases. I was so sure that they would at least try. I said all of the right things, did not come off as aggressive, desparate or threatening, and the person I asked has a great relationship with me....so...yeah. I am looking elsewhere, which is scary after 10 years. I planned on leaving once school was done but I'm strongly considering leaving much earlier now. I need change. I need to move up in life. I feel like I've wasted so much time there....for it to come to this really saddens me. What's worse is that my bosses really like me but still can't come up with a few bucks to keep me there. I've given so much and now I feel like I'm being treated like I am just... expendable. I deserve more than this. I will come out stronger. always do. I feel a bit lost and frightened by all of this, but things happen for a reason. I really do belive that.

On another note...it's my birthday on Monday! Even though work made me cry today I will be enjoying some fun, some Mexican food tonight and definitely a few cocktails after today's events at work. I really need to celebrate life and focus on the good right now. I am also going to start my new tattoo and "fix" my sleeve. I am so excited!
New set coming......soon! Stay tuned for updates!

I love SG. I recently spent a much needed fun filled weekend with some really amazing people, in an absolutely beautiful house, having an absolutely fabulous time. Brooklyn shot a whole bunch of amazing sets, (stay tuned!) along with her sweet and talented sister, Suzanne. Also on hand were Machete, Chrysis, Perry and Lux. A Hopeful named Liya came up one day to shoot... and I think she will make a great SG! I am telling you, each of these ladies is so funny, witty, intelligent and lovely! I can't believe how awesome everyone was. We had such a great time--cooking, drinking wine, lounging on the heated bathroom floor (I want one!) while watching each other shoot sets, relaxing by the fireplace...(I want that too) but most of all, really enjoying each others company. The house was filled with laughter the entire weekend... good vibes and positivity all around. I shared a room with Chrysis, who kept me laughing all weekend. (In bed, giggling like assholes at porn titles on cable, etc..) We cooked so much yummy food and all ate together at dinner which was really nice for me. How often can you get a group of girls together, some who don't know one another, who all get along so well? It really amazes me! This is what I love the most about SG--being afforded the opportunity to meet and hang out with people like these girls. The sense of community and support among these girls was really an affirmation of everything that I love about being here. It also refutes the commonly held misbelief that girls are catty, jealous and bitchy to one another--none of that at all. Not a stitch. So to sum it up, that weekened reaffirmed and solidfied the reason why I love it here and one of the main reasons why I think this site is still going strong.. well, that and the epic boobies and butts, lol.
P.S. I am stealing everyone elses pics. Stay tuned!