Looking For a Photographer...

BORED AT WORK want to do a new set!

this coming Tuesday my lovely tattoo artist will be finishing my chest piece. its really good because i have another SG photo shoot coming up. man im trying to think of a theme for my next set, but my mind is all over the place! if you guys have any suggestions throw them at me, im open mined!

So its official I started to cover up and extend my chest piece. It is not all the way done its about ¾ there, but after 5 hours just on the out line I pussied out......colour is to come!!!!!

Now......


The colour can go one of two ways

a) the traditional colours stance of red heart and creamy white greeny yellow magnolias.

Or

b) the electric colour stance of a fucking electric blue heart with purple shading. Then the magnolias a bright magenta pink fading into white.

Ill soon decide but I am in the ruts on what to do???? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Man I need a new job plus new apartment..... So much drama going on everywhere!!!!!


Queen West here i come!

So today a pair of scissors came in contact with my hair. They got into this very large quarrel, and in the end the scissors won.

Bye Bye long hair!

Where has all this time gone, thoughts flash by on a reel as if it were a movie. Was it ever real, or was his love just a figment of my imagination. What is love anyways, the oxford dictionary describes love as "an intense feeling of tender affection and compassion" towards another person or object. We fall in love to feel needed, yet once in love we lose all aspect of why we're really there. That need is fulfilled and we find our selves off course, that once happiness slowly vanishing into a sea of tears. Hate devourers every moment that lays a head, for the love that was once shared has aimlessly been forgotten.

How sad it is that love has just become a word said to someone at the end of the conversation or letter. Something said to make the other person not question what you feel. "love straight up baby", that's what it is a word that has lost all it's meaning over the years. It has slowly fallen apart corrupting and destroying the hopeless romantics heart. Love is now ended in devoice, a simple word consuming people into its destructive path of misconception and lies. There it is, an end, a brake up, a verb used to often for one to count. So easy it is to end a relationship without thinking of the damage you are creating. to just forget about that one person to whom you so truly loved. Let them go, and you wont have to deal with their problems, forget like I said for it's the cowards way out.

Random thoughts. Not knowing where they are going. Scrabbled across my mind in with only a single dot, a period to end them. Boys. Money. Life. Death. Eating. Not Eating. Vodka. Drugs. Addictions in general. Sex. Its all there right now, winding around a little pillar at the tip of my mind. Each thought screaming out at the same time, "think of me, think of me!" Tears fall down my face, it's too much to handle!. Though tears are overrated, so I dry my eyes, take a deep breath. Inhale. the emotion is gone.


Ha "dynamite flowers bloom but once a year" I find my self thinking. Words that haven't crossed my mind in quite sometime. You won't understand what they mean, even if I wanted to tell you. Just a simple phrase that brings a peaceful serenity to my mind.

Feeling too much or too little right now I cant seem to pin point them problem. Screaming. Crying. Grabbing a bat to beat someone's face in I cant really say. Uncertainties of all my thoughts is what I can say for sure. But there you have it, a wonderful contradiction within one sentence. Im all over the place right now So I scream with the trembling sounds of silence. Inhale, think. Exhale, thought.

……….Cant sleep…….. Cant eat…... The noise in the back ground is blaring and causing my head to ach. Oh how I loan for the comfort of a boy right now. For him to hold me, to touch me, but most of all to talk to me. To have one of those endless conversations about life. One of those ones that last all night and you find your self looking out your bedroom window and the sun is beginning to rise. oh the pleasures and endorphins that are released when having a conversations like that. Morning sex is what its like I find, well minus the talking part. The emotions that are produced are along the same level. Calm. Smooth. Peaceful. Sensual. Amazing. Well just simply amazing.

Ahhhhh Fuck boys…wait on the other hand fuck men they're just to much to comprehend. What they do, how they act, so hard it is to decipher whether you are just a good fuck, or the girl of his dreams. Though Ill find what im looking for one day again, I know I will, but for now ill continue to live with what I got and hope for just a little more.