New videos!

I recorded two MIssy Higgins songs yesterday. But I only put one of them on SG so the other is on my Youtube page Hope you like them!





I'm totally going bowling tonight.



Hopefully I will shoot a new set soon.


don't forget to check out my store: happy sushi

Check out my new Etsy store!

Happy Sushi

Go take a look at my latest creations





EDIT:
at 12:25am, July 12th

I'M DRUNK.
And kind of sad.
And happy.
And horny.
And stupid.
And waiting.
And lonely.
And scared.
And pathetic.

I promised a certain someone that I would write a descriptive, lengthy blog, truly explaining how I am feeling right now. I have decided that I am not doing this for this person as much as I am doing it for myself.

For the past several weeks my life has been a whirlwind of extreme changes, realizations and new beginnings. Without the assistance of marijuana, I have been forced, at least for the last week, to face reality. I have been told that to a certain extent, it helps to bury your feelings, in order to get through an extremely emotional and stressful time. Last night, while driving back to my father's from Andy and Shawn's, I wanted to cry, but could not. I don't know if this is because of the pills--I know I'm capable of crying--I did it a good amount while I was with Nick. Maybe that's it though--maybe I'm all out of tears--I have no idea. It's not that I did not feel sad, because I did. I just couldn't cry. It can get frustrating sometimes.

I am a pro when it comes to burying feelings. I learned to do it exceptionally well at a young age, so it's no wonder that I still do it. Yesterday, Nick showed up at my dad's before I left for work. He wanted me to help him move some of his stuff up to Akron--he needed me to drive my SUV there and back because he had ran out of room in the U-Haul and his car. I said no and consequently was berated for being irresponsible. This was my responsibility, my fault, he couldn't believe I wouldn't do this one thing for him. I told him to leave, and so he left angry. I don't know how I managed to stay calm throughout the whole thing. I know he's trying to get to my head and I just knew it wouldn't be a good idea AT ALL to drive up there. Part of me felt like an awful person though.

What I currently have with Shawn is something completely natural. I feel comfortable and happy with him. But spending practically every waking moment with someone for a year and a half, well, you begin to feel as though they are a part of you. I can't help but feel empty at times because Nick is no longer here. I suppose the important thing is that I know this is the right decision.

I think that's enough spilling my guts for now.
If you haven't already, watch Zombie Strippers. It is hilarious.
"Convince me you're human. And make it ontological."

New band name.
New band myspace.

Add it: http://www.myspace.com/theschillingsmusic

I have a hangover.
I'm officially out of weed.
This bums me out...a lot.
I'm supposed to check out an apartment I'm interested in today.

It really makes you feel like you are going crazy when you are extremely happy and remorseful at the same time.

I had coffee with Keely a couple days ago. I love that girl.

My new "single" status has got one of my ex-boyfriends emailing me and telling me how great I am and how he still wants to be with me.

What the motherfuck is going on with the world?


Also this:

Greetings.

I've been in another world for the past several weeks. Two days ago I officially told him it was over. He is leaving town in less than a week.

It is incredibly terrifying having to make a decision that impacts your life tremendously. I know this is what I have to do though.




Well it's been a long time, long time now
Since I've seen you smile
And I'll gamble away my fright
And I'll gamble away my time
And in a year, a year or so
This will slip into the sea
Well it's been a long time, long time now
Since I've seen you smile

Nobody raise your voices
Just another night to mourn to
Nobody raise your voices
Just another night to mourn to

Things that Happened:

- Got a new haircut. People say I'm "scene"




- I'm not going to LA anymore this summer...I'm doing it next year
- Nick and I are "taking a break"
- I'm bored, and because of this, I am getting drunk/high every night
- I hear about FYAD every single second of my life. GAY AS HECK.
- Andy wouldn't stop yelling last night.

"I hate you fuckers. Go fuck yourself. Go die!"
5 minutes later...
"Haha, that was funny. I just totally was FYAD posting."
5 minutes later.
"No but seriously FUCK YOU."




I want ice cream. I love my new profile pic. Yayz.

Here's a clip from my band's first show last Thursday:



Check out our myspace too!

The Pending



Tonight we're playing some house party...so I gotta go!

I'm definitely bummed that I won't be going to Havana next week. But it's for good reason--my band has our first show! Yes!

I'm getting anxious. I leave for LA in 2 weeks. Holy shit...2 weeks?! I'm excited to be helping out SG Radio and can't wait to meet some awesome ladies.

Ok gotta go
Later dudes

Holy crap. So yesterday we had our first ever full band practice. It was sweet. Everything just sounds so much better with a drummer--and an awesome one at that. We've got four songs down and our next practice is Monday. I plan on bringing my camera and recording one of the songs so ya'll can hear us jammin.
I'm so glad you guys liked my new song too. I don't really think it's that great, but hopefully I'll keep getting better as I write more.

Last Saturday I had my first non-nude photo shoot. Crazy. It was fun, in a really bizarre kind of way. The photographer lives in Columbus but was coming down to Athens for some Alumni meeting and we decided to set up a shoot. He said he had a friend named Billy who wanted to come along and that Billy was a little...off the wall. Billy is a transgender, which of course, I have no problem with. He was just super weird. He kept putting really weird objects in all of the shots, like a ceramic frog. And then, when we were shooting outdoors he wanted me to pretend like I was hitting this volleyball that he had brought. Apparently he's working on the OU Volleyball team's website. I swear to god if my pictures are on that website I will be mortified. In no way do I know how to hit a volleyball.

Here, let me show you:



Yeah.

At least it was fun...



Once I get the photoshopped images I'll post them

And now, I must get ready for Hell City! YES!