Eons have passed since I last logged into SG after all the legal drama. The whole layout is way more complex. Sometimes I miss the simplicity of old school internet pages. Less to keep up with.

I'm sure I'll get booted in no time, but I don't even bother to check in on the site anymore. I've been doing research on SG every since they modified their model contract and I would not sign it, and since I wondered where my favorite photographer from SG disappeared to. I never once thought SG was literally "female empowering porn" if you will. Porn is porn. This is just soft porn. That is that, and no big deal. But to tout oneself as a progressive and likeable business entity when in fact it is anything but is both disappointing and angering. I was fine with selling my "image" to SG for a reasonable modeling fee, but I was not and am not fine with selling "myself" literally in a fashion that prevents freedom of choice with my body thanks to the recent contract clause addition. I had some good times on the site but it makes me sad to see where it is going. I wonder if the new models have the foresight to look into the expansive ramifications of joining the site. As for me, I am frustrated that something with so much potential seems to be a business just like any other: not interested in anything but profits and monopoly, or so it seems. We will see how long this journal may stay up. I left out key words that the SG search engine uses to locate dissenters. But by all means, freedom of expression and opinion also became a rarity on SG.

Well I moved out of the Bay Area and headed back up North to Humboldt. I think it's important to de-root oneself from the safety zone. It's been a bit of a transition. I lived here last summer but I knew I'd be back in Santa Cruz in no time. Now I don't think I'll be moving back at all. I'll eventually land in SF, but my plans have shifted.
I GRADUATED whoop whoop so now I have a phat-ass loan to pay off, but I don't quite feel like facing a real JOB yet even though I porbably should, so instead, I am hiding out among the oceans and the trees for a while, waiting tables mmm hmmm, chilling, and saving up to travel to Thailand.
I don't have much of anything interesting to say. My last entry was just sad and I thought it was time for a change.

d

Benni SG has passed.
It is sad and shocking to hear when someone so beautiful and still young leaves us.
I just wanted to write a small note for her here.
I hope she is in another place where everything is more simple, peaceful, and happier, if those concepts apply to wherever energy goes.

Her passing follows that of my close friend Matt. Pulls at the barely sewn stitches that I threaded a little over, I think, a month now. I have not been counting the days. I miss him very much. When an amazing song moves my spine and my hips from black vinyl disks, that is when I think I miss him the most. I miss him pulling records out of his crate just to make me smile and melt all over the dance floor.

For whatever reason or purpose, two amazing humans have gone, one I knew just a little in SG land, and one I knew and loved very much on tangible earth.

Blessings to them both.

d

Yo peeps it is my bday holla holla.
Sorry there have not been any new sets.
Well actually there are, but there's been changes in the system at SG, so I will most likely just stay as a regular ol' member.
Sorry my dears.
That is the beauty and agony of paperwork.
Things just never stay the same, do they.
Toodles pips,

d

Well alright then. Somehow it is already 2007.
Does someone push the fast-forward button on time as the years go by?
I spent New Year's Eve shakin' my booty to some bad-ass beats by this lass named Miranda.
Not sure if that's her dj name or what, but it was good. Some old school down low feelings mixed with bumping beats and dirty tracks.
Oh my Lord how I love vinyl, except that she ws spinning CD's I'm pretty sure. I get all confused when that happens. I try not to be all faithful only to o9ld school methods because that is pretty narrow minded, and yet, I need to adapt myself more I guess.
But la la la, this is all babble anyways. No lollipops sprung from the ground and no herds of zebras went running across the ceiling because I was sober sober sober. Car's registration is expired so have to be exctra careful of the po-po, dig. It was tolerable because the music fucked me up just fine, just fine indeed.
Maybe one of my chums snapped some pictures. If so, I'll stick them up here later. I left my camera for the eve.
Happy New Years!
Actually, before I go, I must say that I think it kind of sucks, all the stigma that New Year's has to be all epic and shit. It's great when it is, but sometimes it's no worse to be chillin'.
Speakin of, I am back up North until school swings back into full motion so I'm gonna go RELAX yep yep.

D

The time. The time!
Wherever does it go?
It is almost Christmas, and I didn't even get the moment to upload my nifty Hallow's Eve gte up.
It is late.
My eyelids, they hang heavy and solemn, for the hour is late, and sleep has been less than friendly with me as of late. I was on a role there for a while, but alas, ye' ol' insomnia and attention difficulties.
AGH!
I spent FOREVER trying to send/email my set all mother-f*&^%$(& zip file stylee and it was/is a pain in the butt, at least on my faithful, yet old, beater dinosaur PC.
I believe it will be old school method, CD.
I thought, you know, learn something new, etc., but it is a pain in the butt so eff it.
Yeah, so Christmas...hmmm, indeed.
Mixed feelings, yes, mixed feelings....

L8,

D

The world is spiraling into a shitstorm.
I guess it always has been but it seems the entropy is speeding up the course of degradation.
I'm not much of an activist so I choose to not spew opinions and such except that the news, indeed, is utterly depressing in that distant, cold way offered when events are spread far overseas.

On a different note, I am currently seeking employment while I finish getting my double degree in Art and Lit. Anyone looking for a gal with mad skills having run her own small vintage clothing business in the past, with exceptional oral and written communication skills, and photographic experience? Hmmm? Bay Area hit me up!
Either that, or a job waiting tables will do. Something to pay the rent and keep me in touch with the public.

I'm off to sleep now.
Aikido, surfing (or at least getting tumbled by waves while I learn how to ride my new-to-me board) and homework seem to have cured my mad insomnia that has plagued me for, oh I don't know, most of my life.

Love to the peeps...

D

Yo peeps!
I been away from the tek-gnaw-low-gee for quite a while!
I didn't make it to Costa Rica for political CIA reasons I am not at liberty to discuss, BUT I did spend a month up North in the wee little town of Trinidad in Humboldt and it was pretty pretty and I had ever the loveliest company to keep everything warm and toasty in the fog so I did enjoy that indeed.
Well, shite, with an e, I have two sets to send in but lag queen shot them (me I am the lag queen) back in January so I need to get them out in the mail! It's bad ass cuz I shot it myself. There's another one too my friend shot and she did a good job.
So this is all prattle prattle.
I am moving into a new house with a new surf spot and I just got a new-to-me board so I am very excited.
I haven't been in the water in soooooooooooooooo long and it's very much liquid antidepressant under my belly so I cannot wait!
So once I get my internet set back up I'll go ahead and spill ye' ol' noggin' again in case it's of anything of interest, or even not. Sometimes people are easily entertained.

Love to the felines and the alleycats...

D

Word.

Eff the last journal entry.

It's friggin' depressing.

Hey, anyone hunkered down in Costa Rica? I need to learn Spanish, but I prefer to learn it and surf when I'm not. Ideas, anyone?

Till next..

D

Oh oh oh...AND I have actually already been to Costa Rica, but not for a month which is what I want. Not all super gringo style either. Anyway, thanks below for the private tutor idea.