Hey everybody what's going on!! Getting ready for thanksgiving I imagine.. mmm good shit... so whats up I want to hear your Haloween stories.. mine was awesome I put on a really bloody performance. I used two of the other topless dancers as props as I tied them to either side of the stage poles with caution tape.. now mind you they look all cute and sexy and here I am wearing black rubber boots, a pair of camo shorts, long black rubber gloves, a pair of goggles and not shirt. After tying them to the poles I reach over and bust out this ice box, I opened it and pulled out two heart shaped sponges that were covered in blood. needless to say after that it was a blood batch on stage to the tune of Skinny Puppy it was awesome i scared the shit out of so many customers lol priceless..

so whats new?? I went to Mudvayne last friday it was THE SHIT it was my first time ever seeing them I would defenitley go see them again FOR REALS!!!

Anyway this Saturday Texas Tech against the BOOOOMER SOOONERS what you know about that!!??

Ok here is the new link to the video watch!!

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=36626606

Hello everybody! my latest music video was just released please go check it out and tell me what you think!! Special thanks goes to Chaotic Productions, C.E.U. Entertainment, Cody Bailey, and Texas Hippie Coalition!!

http://myspacetv.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=2117468325

Well hello everybody!! I know I know what you are thinking.. what Damien doesn't love us anymore?? yes it is true it has been quite awhile since i have been on here but I have been a busy little bee!! I posted some new pics of some shoots I have recently done so check em out!! More to come! So yeah what has everyone else been doing, its been waaaaaaaaaaay too long! we have alot of catching up to do yo!! and to all of my people in Oklafuckinghoma, what are you doing this Friday!!?? come see me!! Hot chicks and love metal bands, cant beat that shit with a metal stick!! C'MOAN!!

Happy New Year everyone!

Howdy folks!! just wanted to give you a heads up, I did a new photoshoot so I threw up some of the pics that I thought were the coolest out of the whole shoot, I mean, there were like 600 pics so I narrowed it down quite a bit, hope you guys like them, so now what is everybody planning on doing for Haloween?? woo hoo!! that is my favorite holiday!! but then again for me it's Halloween everyday HAHAHA!!

Ok dudes I totaly posted a bulletin about this on myspace and have been discussing this with people on there for like two hours, not it's your turn.. I just watched the movie Donnie Darko for the frist time and it confused the fuck out of me.. what in your opinion is that movie all about? oh yeah and hope you all had a good weekned <3

got some work done last night woo hoo!! its not finished but it looks pretty damn good already, I cant wait to fill in the color..

hey guys what's new?? me, not much, been spending a lot ot time at home lately, just been kind of getting to knpw myself better I guess, so far so good anyway I am really excited because the I am about to go down to my work to meet the bands that I booked for our show next weekend, we have to run the P.A. power lines today just incase we run into any problems we can deal with it now versus finding that shit out at sound check day of the show, anyway as you guys knpw when I lived in San Diego I booked shows all the time but this is different because not only is it my first show in Oklahoma but it is at a topless bar! how crazy is that right? live metal bands and topless dancers, plus the place that I work at has never done this before so I am honnored that they allowed me to do this, because I know they are taking a chance on me, just hope that place is filled with heads come Saturday..

anyway I did a new photoshoot a few weeks ago, I added them to my "Jager Damien" album, hope you guys like them.. enjoy the rest of your weekend! <3

so I posted this blod on myspace a few days ago and I wanted to share it with all of my firneds here hope you al had a good weekend.

So for about the past month I can honestly tell you I was in the most despair I have ever felt in my entire life, and because of it I did things to mask the pain because I wanted to forget, I wanted to forget that I even exsisted to be honest with you, it got to the point where I couldnt spend one night being sober, it was really beginning to take its toll on me though mentally, physically, and spiritually, when I looked in the mirror I didnt see myself anymore, hell I dont know who it was but she kind of reminded me of a ghost that couldnt move on because of something bad that happend that she couldnt let go of, I was honestly hauntng my own house, not living, not flourinshing, just dwelling in the dark, I really have shut most people out, but in all honestly I needed to do that to evaluate who my real friends are and who was "just along for the ride". I can tell you now there wont be too many of you that I will ever be in contact with again because I have come to learn who my real friends are and who just wanted something from me, or thought I could benefit them in some way or another, call me a bitch, whatever, I expected that, I dont have time in my life anymore to try to make you guys happy, my intentions will always be good, and I would never want to bring pain or discomfort on anybody on purpose, and if I do, I apologize, but I am not getting any younger and I want to actually enjoy the rest of my life, I never ever want to experience agony like that anymore, some of you may already understand what I am talking about, some of you, just wait and see, once you experience pain on that level, you will never look at life the same again. Then you will understand where I am coming from.



So moving foward, I finally forced myself to quit drinking, it was hard at first but I knew it had to be done, so far so good actually, I feel much more in control of my own actions and thoughts, much more calm, much more thankful to be alive, although this experience sucked the spirit out of me, I still have other things to live for, its getting easier each day, not to say that the pain dosent still come back on a daily basis, I have just been able to finally cope and not let it consume me.



So oddly enough, ever since I quit drinking, and actually I am tyring to quit somking too so its been a little while since I had a cigarette as well, I have been having some really weird dreams, no matter what the situation or scenario in the dream are always these people that have really hurt me bad in the past, my dad, my step mom, Scott, Tom, others, I am thinking to myself, why all of a sudden are these people who I have had no contact with for a long time suddenly bombarded my dreams?? then I have come to think that maybe, as all this shit and poison lets itself out of my body, they are going with it, and for the first time in a long time, I was happy and hopeful to wake up, and alothough its raining, its beautiful outside and I intend to enjoy it.