Well now.... I've not been so good at this updating malarkey, have i?

My exams were piss bad. Well, one of them. I really didn't do very well in it i think, but it's not the end of the world, there's always re-sits.

I really have very little to say for myself at the moment. I'm trying to muster the enthusiasm for all this that i once had. I'm not managing very well.

So, i'll post up some awful photos instead. As you should know by now, i LOVE the eurovision, and even though we didn't make it to the final, i still went and got silly drunk and watched it. I even wore my eurovision dress. Tycal and RedRabbits came to Cork, and i demanded we go for cocktails. In the middle of the afternoon. And i was drunk as all hell. Wanna see?






I think this was the point all the cocktails caught up with me, it's all downhill from here, sorry.



I wouldn't be me if i didn't have a good rant.


And a goofy moment. God knows i'm goofy. And isn't it cute when i drag others down with me


This is when the voting started in the eurovision. I believe i'm screaming what the fuck. I do that..


I stole some girls phone, and started taking photos of her. Apparently i was too drunk to speak at this stage too.


Isn't Johns shirt lovely? I don't think he was impressed that i bought him a specific eurovision shirt.


This would be me hurling abuse at the telly then. Eurovision brings out the worst in me.


We do not look impressed.


I had super fun with these two:



I'm going on an adventure this weekend, and i'm being told that this adventure MAY involve seeing some of these

which excites me greatly. I do love things like that, and if we really are going to an aquarium, i'll be like a kid in a sweet shop.

Oh, and i said i'd show you lot my Terence, so here he is


Well, that's it. Like i said, i'm finding it very hard to be interested in this anymore. Maybe it'll come back, i don't know. But all i know is, i've met some wonderful people on here. And seen some hot women naked, like the BEAUTIFUL Sinope. I hope you've checked out her set with Neyrissa? OMG, it's hot.
Click here to see it, in all it's hot glory

I have a girlie crush on Sinope, it's HUGE.

Right, i think that's me did. I have a chesty cough, and a snotty nose.

Night.....

I'm not dead, i am still here, despite my quietness....

I'm hella swamped with study and all that jazz, my exams are in THREE DAYS TIME, and it's fair to say i'm moderatly freaking out. Ish.... But i wanted to post a quicky to say that a). I've not vanished off the face of the earth and b). Normal service will resume shortly.

So, in the meantime, i took a notion to do some scanning, to show you lot some things. Like show and tell. Which we don't have in Ireland.

Anyway.....

About a year ago, i took a notion to learn to drive. All my friends take the piss out of my driving something fierce. Last week i had my driving test. For the first time. I should really say, the only time, cuz i passed. None of my friends passed first time, so i officially am the shit, and my friends are so sour right now. And THIS is gonna be my photo on my driving licence:


And, like i mentioned, i'm all sorts of exam stressed. But i got a LOVELY handmade card in the post, from the ever lovely Lofty, wishing me good luck. It proper made me smile. He also sent me a hello kitty pencil case, to facilitate my carrying of pens to my exam. How cool is that? I love the card, here's the inside:


So, i'm up to my eyeballs in study, but in a few days, it'll be less



and more:


And Lofty's coming to visit this weekend, so it'll be awesome, once my exams are over. Phew.

Oh, and i found this pic, of me and Sparrow, and i wanted to share it, i do miss her.


Right, i'm gonna get back to study. Miss you lovely lot.....

WISH ME LUCK.

Well, a proper update is WAY overdue. It's gonna be a big'un, so i'll need some tea to fuel this blog. Hang on...

Oh that IS better. Now...where do we start.

Last saturday, i ventured off to Dublin, for the annual sg Ireland meet. And it was lovely. We met for civilised drinks. And then went for a lovely, civilised meal, then to the pub for more quiet drinks. This was the plan. It ended up being a little more rowdy than that however. It all started fine, but then the wine started flowing over dinner, and we were mostly tanked by the time we got to the pub. But we had a great night.



I think this is the point where we got a bit rowdy.



But we held it together pretty well.....THEN went to the pub.

And THIS pretty much sums up how it went from there....




And then Sparrow showed up, and that's really as much as i remember..


Let me tell you about the sick head i had sunday morning. And i decided it'd be a GREAT idea to fly to Dublin, flying with a hangover is NOT a great idea.

On tuesday i got a new tattoo. I LOVE it. It's a seahorse. On my right leg. Pretty much the lenght of my right leg. I've named him Terence, and oh he is pretty. I've no photos of Terence, but he's not fully done yet, but when he is, you'll be the first to see him. Maybe...

Wednesday, off i went to the airport again, and i went on my holidays. I went to Glasgow. I LOVE Glasgow. Alright, it didn't all go to plan, but i did have so much fun. Lofty met me in the airport, and that was the beginning of our Glasgow adventure. Wednesday night was some drunken disgrace. We went out, on the piss proper. I DO have to represent, what with me being Irish. At one point i went to the bar, and came back with 2 drinks, 2 shots, and 2 cocktails. And the barman was my new best firend.So, we were pretty drunk. We went to some shitty club, but they played Rancid, BrandNew, and Alkaline Trio, and i danced like a lunatic, while the cool emo boys looked on in disdain. Lofty was too drunk to dance at that point. Thursady, we spent the day DYING of hangover. And i hung out with Lofty's cat, Shameela, who high fives for the fucking win. I LOVE her. Friday, we went to Loch Lomond to the aquarium. Oh how much fun was had???
We saw seahorses. Real life ones...


Baby seahorses

Lobsters

Manta rays

One of whom took a shine to me...

catfishes

Lofty liked this fish..

Jellyfish

There was one of those tunnels you walk through with all teh fish too....




and otters...


It was a GREAT day out.
We even got a certificate at the end, go us...

Then friday night, we went out again. Cuz, y'know, we'd had a day to rest....
So, me, Lofty, Kintoun, Itachi and __foreverlost__ all went out, and more fun was had, and later on we bumped into Dixy BONUS. I LOVE those guys. They're so lovely.
I'm going to steal some of the photos __foreverlost__ took, sssshhh.
This is Lofty, he made my trip. He's not just a bloke off the internet, he's a brilliant friend.


This is Itachi

This is Kintoun harassing Itachi

This is my new haircut.....


This is what happens to an over excited, tired, drunk Irish girl.......

This is me and Dixy. Excuse the drunk photo... She's all sorts of beautiful, awesomeness.


So, that's my trip, in photos. I'm home now. Tired, but happy. I had a lovely time. Did me the world of good. My exams are all, ALL on May 3rd, so from here on in, it'll be study, study, study. Which is cool too. So, i'm going to get my head down, and study hard. I'm all brimming with happy writing this blog, which is ironic really. But i've had such a great time, and in the last while, i've REALLY worked out who my friends are, and who loves me, and i know i'm a very lucky girl underneath it all. And grateful isnt' even the word.

Phew, told you it was going to be a big 'un.

I have had long hair all my life. All of it......




Until today. It's all GONE. I have super short hair.There will be photos soon.

I'm off to Dublin for the sg meet. Catch you soon shipmates.

I never know quite where to start. Which is usually why my blogs are so rambling.

Perhaps we should add a little bit of chronologicality to my ramblings?

The boy from my last blog turned out to be a donkey. Don't they always? I've not heard from him much since our date. Which was the best date i've had in the last 2 years, so i think that says more about how low my standards are then anything else. Oh well.

I passed my exams. Spectacularly. I am VERY happy, as i really put in an awful lot of work. And my results really showed that. Now i only have 2 exams left, i cannot describe the relief i feel saying that.

So, after my results, i went out to celebrate. Me and my best friend, John, went to the pub. We were having a lovely evening. John got slightly carried away at one point, and as he was dancing about, he fell over a barstool. He said his back hurt,and me being the typical best friend, told him to shut up moaning, and sit down. And we kept drinking. The next morning he rung me from the emergency room..... He hurt his back really badly. Which officially makes me the worst best friend in the world, ever. He was off work for the last week,. i broke my best friend,eeeep.

It's that time of the year again. The build up to the eurovision. I do love it, i have no shame whatsoever about this fact. Ireland has won the eurovision more than any other country. We own that contest. But last year, well, last year was not our finest moment. We came last. So, we can really do no worse than that, so this is what the great Irish public voted as our eurovision song:


So, like i mentioned in my last blog, my love life is a disaster. And it's gotten me ever so slightly down. But i was talking to someone recently, and they sort of made me think about things in a whole new way. This guy is a great, lovely guy, who was left by someone i thought knew better. Anyway, that's not for here. But he said to me, that people always say the reason people like me get dicked over os cuz i'm too nice, too honest, too loyal, too genuine, and that's not true. He told me not to be ashamed of those traits, and to not ever change them. And while my love life IS a disaster, i can be proud, that despite being let down, and crushed time and time again, i still manage to remain those things. That's something to be proud of.

My blogs are always really serious, and then when people meet me, they expect this serious, emo head. And i'm goofy and loud, and giddy.

I've taken a whole night off, no study, no gym. Just sitting on my ass. I'm going to go do it in style. I shall drink tea, and eat cake to beat the band.

Night so. Fill me in on what you lovely lot have been up to...

My lovelife has been a disaster in the last 2 years. Wrong 'un, after wrong'un have come and gone. And i've gotten real down about this fact, like it was my fault. I genuinely thought that no "real life" boy would ever be attracted to me again.

This may well actually be the case, but i'm not stressed about it anymore.

There is a hot boy that comes into where i work occassionaly. I have had a bit of a crush on him for a while now. He came in thursday, and as usual, i got all goofy. And then, y'know what i did. I wrote my phone number on a piece of paper, and chased after him. And he texted. And we went on a date. Even if i never hear from him again, i think the fact that i managed to do that, AND get a date out of it is pretty fucking cool.

I'm feeling really good. College is going well, work isn't awful. And my friends are cool.

And finally someone had the decency to set me straight, i am straight now. And happy.

That is all for now.

Well then......

Ya, you can ignore that last blog, and it's emoness. I've been having a bit of a bad run for the last few weeks, it happens to everyone, and it's not the end of the world. I was just focusing on only the bad things, there are good things aswell, so that's what this blog is going to be. I'm not a whiny, emo, miserable git. And i forget that all too often lately.

SO.......GOOD THINGS.

I was a bit upset during the week, and i talked to my friend John. Upset is the wrong word. I can't think of a word that describes it better, perhaps disappointed. Who cares? Anyway, i talked to John, and was having the "ugh i'm so repulsive, i've been single for 2 years, i must be the ugliest girl in the world, ever" moment. And john just asked me straight how many real life boys have asked me out in the last week, and i said 2, and he asked why i'd said no, and it just slipped out. Cuz i'm not ready for a real life relationship. And it's the first time that's hit me. And i'm not ready. And now that i know that, i'm less.....again with the not knowing words. I'm less worried. That's not 100%, but we'll go with it. I'm not ready for anything in real life, so why'm i getting myself all bent out of shape over internets. That's not a dig at anyone in particular, it's just an observation.

I got my books for my next semester exams. I'm not freaking out. They look do-able. I started working tonight too. There was LOADS going on tonight, and i turned down lots of offers, and stayed home, and studied. How dedicated am i?

I stretched my ear up to 20mm. I always said i'd stop at 10mm, then 15mm, and i said definatly 20mm. Now that i'm there, i'm thinking maybe bigger?????? It's so cute though.

I got the insurance on my car sorted. So i can drive again. Which is good. In cork there are a grand total of 2 people who're into pop punk, me and a boy called Conor. Me and Conor used to go out a million years ago, but that was a disaster, but we still sit in the pub, and talk shit about all these bands that no-one else in the pub has ever heard of. Ya, ok, we like cheesy pop, but we REALLY do. I'm not ashamed of my pop punk love, and neither is he, so we get on. Anyway, we were talking last week and he mentioned fenix tx, and i'd forgotton how much i LOVE that band, so i grabbed a fenix tx cd, and went for a drive, and sang my little heart out along as i drove around. I look like a lunatic driving, but it always cheers me right up.

I can do anything i put my mind to. That's not sheer arrogance. I can. I just find i can't put my mind to a lot. I have a VERY short attention span. My friends joke that i get distracted by shiny things. It's not far off the truth.

Me and John joined a new gym. It's very nice. We joined as a couple. He still managed to pick up a boy in the bathroom. I wish i was gay sometimes, he makes it look piss easy.

On my drive last night i ended up at a shopping centre. I bought some life essentials.Glittery pink scarf. Glittery grey gloves. Slipper socks, that are the COOLEST things ever. And underwear. I'm not one to bring with you anywhere in case of emergency.

I used to live with a boy called Damien. He was a spanner. And he used to only drink earl grey tea, and we all thought he was the biggest gimp ever for this fact. Now i love earl grey tea, and everytime i drink of it, i think of him, and laugh to myself. He was a muppet.

I cut my fringe every saturday. It's part of my routine. Also part of my routine is realising i've cut too much, and it's not straight, and the subsequent panic. Every saturday my friends get texts from me freaking out over my fringe. My friends hate my fringe, for this reason. Right now i have sexy hair. This entails my fringe pinned back off my face, so i look like some middle aged lady. The first person who points out i am a middle aged lady will be in so mcuh fucking trouble.

I SEEM to always have an internet crush. This isn't true. I have had a grand total of 5 internet crushes. My original, and best internet crush was a boy called Neil. He's lovely. He was lovely 5 years ago when we met, and he's still lovely. We lost contact for a while, but we found each other again last year. And we started to lose contact again, so we're making a huge effort not to. I'd be sad not having Neil in my life again. I love my texts from him every night asking how my day was.

I'm not emo. Honest. I'm a goofy, honest girl. Sometimes too goofy, sometimes too honest, but y'know what, i like me. And that's really all anyone can hope for, so i'm doing pretty good in the grand scheme of things.

Maybe some fenix tx will cheer you lot up too. Alright dodgy videos aside, you HAVE to love them...



This may be the longest blog ever, but no emo to be seen. No way. I'm SO over the emo scene.......

I'm a fucking idiot.

This isn't really all that earth shattering, but i feel it needs re-iterating. I get panic attacks. I have done for as long as i can remember. They're not that bad on the scale of things, but they're still not pleasant. And the more worked up i get, something just clicks, and all i want to do is vom. So i've been hanging out by my sink for the last 30 mins or so. Lovely, eh?

I fucking hate being positive polly. Things don't ever work out. Not for me at any rate, and this positivity bullshit just means i'm all the more disappointed when things eventually get all cocked up.

I was talking to someone today, a lovely girl i know, or am getting to know i should say maybe. Anyway, someone's dicking her about, and i said that maybe that person has had enough second chances, cuz let's call a spade a spade, why give someone that has treated you like dirt the chance to go and do it all again. And she said, and i'll quote her here, "You're not one for second chances, but in saying that, you don't really give people first chances either". Perhaps she's right. It's got me thinking, and i have to admit, i don't like this thinking malarkey.

I decided a while back that i was going to get rid of all the negative factors in my life. I knew straight off there was one needed getting rid of, but i figured i had to identify what to change, before i could really do much. Sitting down and coming to terms with the things and people, mainly people, that have a negaitve effect on your life, and don't bring any good to the table, it's a really daunting task. And it's not as easy as i thought. And seeing your life laid out like that, and seeing what's pulling you the wrong way, puts so much in perspective. I'll keep ploughing on though. Now that i know, and can see clearly, i'd be a fool to go back.

This isn't meant to be miseryfest 08, but i just needed to get these things off my chest. There's not that many people i feel i can really talk to. So the obvious solution is to pour your heart out to strangers on the internet.... Ara, you'll get distracted by the next naked pretty girl that comes along anyway.

And i've an sgireland meet to tyranically structure. It'll keep me occupied at any rate. Do you know, me, Melissa and Sparrow have never all been in the same room at the smae time. This may be changed soon. I hope. If so, don't worry, there'll be pictures. I'm really looking forward to it.

That weird feeling that everything is on the way up is still there, even though everything has been proper pants since i wrote those words. Weird, innit?

My exams are done till May. It's a huge relief, i was getting all bent out of shape. In school and college i was so laid back, but these exams, i don't actually know why i'm pushing myself so hard... But whatever, i've got 4 of my 6 exams done now. I don't think i did so well in the one yesterday, it was really tough. But, look, it's done, going over and over it in my head isnt' going to help anyone.

I'd like a new job. I don't really know what i want to do though. Perhaps an astronaut? I'd seriously leave my job and train as a mechanic. I told me dad that, and he said the first time i got oil in my hair i'd cry and not ever go back. I love how much faith my family have in me....

But i still have a stupid smile on my face, sorta look insane.
Bigger than this:


My crush may have gotten even bigger. That's all i'm saying.....

All in all, not a great few days, but i'm still on top of the world.

It's only 10 days into the year, and i already know this year is gonna be all sorts of awesome. I can feel it in my waters.

Even though i guess, technically so far it hasn't been so good, i just know good things are only around the corner, i can even taste it. This isn't just wishfulness and fake positivity. This is a feeling in my stomach. It's not something i can even describe all that well, but i know that finally things are gonna go my way. And i don't even know how, but it's really fucking exciting all the same.

Work isn't going so good. Well, that's not strictly speaking true. My boss and me aren't going so good. She's not a very pleasant woman at the best of times, has no social skills, and dislikes me. Both of us are usually ok with that, but lately she just pushes me. And everyone sees it, and everyone has an opinion on it. And if nobody else noticed it, perhaps i'd just assume i was imagining things. But it's the fact that every day people offer me their advice and tell me how unfair the whole thing is. Thing is, i didn't realise it was as bad as people are making it out to be. It's like, i'm very good at my job, real capable, and she's testing my capabilities. That 's all well and good, if there's an end point. Or recognition for passing her little tests. There isn't. It's just getting worse. And my positivity pisses her off even more.

I took today off work to study. My exams start Saturday. I was proper panicing. I didn't think i had nearly enough work done, until i sat down and did last Septembers exam paper. If i sat that exam this morning, i'd have got 77%, which is actually quite good considering that was before my cramming. So i'm facing into this exam all positive. Which is a nice feeling.

And i have a crush. It just sort of happened.

I'm loving this year so far.

EDIT:My set was rejected, i LOVE this set, so check it out here
I had fun shooting it, and i think it's a goofy set, so if you like it, make sure you say so. I'll know....