PICS
good question!
wouldya look at me ruining someone's boner with incessant use of "blur"!
also, i read somewhere else today that i'm apparently overrated. i would probably even agree with that on some days.
thanks for keeping me in check, world. i'm being quite sincere even if this does sound sarcastic. really!
edit: aw, you guys!
i like this one:
i keep trying to say something (profound or otherwise). but, like a lot of things lately... i forget what i was even trying to do before i started. that's been kind of tough.
so, where was i? busy... that's where. also, i kind of stopped the 365 because i got sick of every photo being of ME. i just don't think i'm cut out for that level of constant self-introspection. i'll turn it into a 52 weeks instead.
so, what was i saying again? oh nothing, really.
P.S this is mine and Archie's ode to cinema. without my love for cinema and my obsession with achieving a cinematic presence my photos wouldn't be what they are today...
not to mention i am so lucky being able to work with beautiful women with their own input and intensity.
so, where was i? busy... that's where. also, i kind of stopped the 365 because i got sick of every photo being of ME. i just don't think i'm cut out for that level of constant self-introspection. i'll turn it into a 52 weeks instead.
so, what was i saying again? oh nothing, really.
P.S this is mine and Archie's ode to cinema. without my love for cinema and my obsession with achieving a cinematic presence my photos wouldn't be what they are today...
not to mention i am so lucky being able to work with beautiful women with their own input and intensity.
Please take a moment to help out with a charitable cause, and maybe even get an awesome print that I photographed of a group of half naked, sweaty suicidegirls?
Help with the fight for cancer and those that care for people near their end. See more of how you can help on Fractal's page
I also recently helped Wendy by "designing" * the 2009-2010 Calendar for the awesome Pinups for Soldiers project (photographed by Alissa!) that helps support those currently stationed in Iraq. So, look out for that coming soon, I will of course let you know all details.
*I'm no real designer, but I wish I could be. I don't quite have the eye for it like CourtneyRiot, though.
Help with the fight for cancer and those that care for people near their end. See more of how you can help on Fractal's page
I also recently helped Wendy by "designing" * the 2009-2010 Calendar for the awesome Pinups for Soldiers project (photographed by Alissa!) that helps support those currently stationed in Iraq. So, look out for that coming soon, I will of course let you know all details.
*I'm no real designer, but I wish I could be. I don't quite have the eye for it like CourtneyRiot, though.
sometimes when you love something enough you have to take a gamble...
yes, it was a bit of a gamble going with blue toned black and white. black and white has almost always been dismissed on SuicideGirls, and generally for good reason.
but, i loved this too much to not go for it. india, thank you for trusting in my vision. i heart you so much.
i thought i had a lot more to say... but for now... don't be afraid to gamble, sometimes.
i am back to filling the holes in my heart left behind by the most amazing friends that live far too far away, with drowning myself in work and escaping into films that make my imagination run wild.
i need to pick that 365 back up.
yes, it was a bit of a gamble going with blue toned black and white. black and white has almost always been dismissed on SuicideGirls, and generally for good reason.
but, i loved this too much to not go for it. india, thank you for trusting in my vision. i heart you so much.
i thought i had a lot more to say... but for now... don't be afraid to gamble, sometimes.
i am back to filling the holes in my heart left behind by the most amazing friends that live far too far away, with drowning myself in work and escaping into films that make my imagination run wild.
i need to pick that 365 back up.
i want to learn to draw. again.
i mean, i used to be able to i know it. i was one of the top in my class for "art" in highschool and my illustrations and paintings were convincing. i need to know where to begin and how to reteach myself. any ideas, tips, links? especially from those of you out there who can do this well... help me?
i am facing one of the biggest challenges of my life right now. i realised today that what i saw before as challenges weren't really so; they were merely one crisis after another. now i am at a time where i am not on the verge of another crisis and it is time...
i know, i'm vague. hasn't that always been the case? if i could offer more insight into the situation i might actually know the answer to all my troubles. and then where would i be? i mean, who doesn't have troubles? we are what we are.
funny how, when i feel like i came to the edge of breakdown, only to pick myself back up and trundle on i want to relearn something old. you'd think with everything else i need to be doing i don't need yet another project...
and that's when i realise oh but i do, for where would i be without all of the things i long to be good at??
i look down and nothing seems real anymore
this is stronger and bigger than us - the world always looks this way to me. so big.
please don't melt away
life is one big dream and everything overwhelms me so much.
i mean, i used to be able to i know it. i was one of the top in my class for "art" in highschool and my illustrations and paintings were convincing. i need to know where to begin and how to reteach myself. any ideas, tips, links? especially from those of you out there who can do this well... help me?
i am facing one of the biggest challenges of my life right now. i realised today that what i saw before as challenges weren't really so; they were merely one crisis after another. now i am at a time where i am not on the verge of another crisis and it is time...
i know, i'm vague. hasn't that always been the case? if i could offer more insight into the situation i might actually know the answer to all my troubles. and then where would i be? i mean, who doesn't have troubles? we are what we are.
funny how, when i feel like i came to the edge of breakdown, only to pick myself back up and trundle on i want to relearn something old. you'd think with everything else i need to be doing i don't need yet another project...
and that's when i realise oh but i do, for where would i be without all of the things i long to be good at??
i look down and nothing seems real anymore
this is stronger and bigger than us - the world always looks this way to me. so big.
please don't melt away
life is one big dream and everything overwhelms me so much.
first: catch me on twitter, now: http://twitter.com/cherryrae (yep, i caved)
i have pneumonia, it turns out. i am so exhausted. it's not so bad, i guess. hopefully i am getting better at this point.
i'm really sorry i couldn't get back to everyone, i really wanted to because so many of you left thoughtful messages on my last entry. most days this week looking at the screen too long has left me dizzy so i've been lying around "resting" as per the doctor's orders, but holy shit is resting boring. well, i guess it wouldn't be if i was able to read or do something else productive that doesn't take too much effort.
i wish i had all of the films that i've always wanted to see to hand, i think that would be the only cure for the boredom of resting. if only there was netflix in canada.
these photos are from some months ago... i do very much love living in vancouver.
it's still a shock to me when i look at my residency card and realise that i am here to stay.
there are so many films coming out this month that i want to go and see. i never really get to go to the pictures very much... maybe just a handful times a year, or less. i want to change that. my favourite theatre in vancouver is the fifth avenue theatre. it's so old and beautiful... it looks like it's straight out of one of my favourite films. it only has three screens, but that's the way they always were until i was probably about 13 and the big cineplexes started popping up in England. i should take some photos of the fifth avenue place sometime...
the films i can't wait to see this month are:
milk
the boy in the striped pajamas
quantum of solace (james bond, duh)
the day the earth stood still (yes, well, you should all know i am a science fiction junkie)
doubt (LOVE PSH)
seven pounds
yes man (i know, i know - but i love jim carey)
the spirit
gran torino
waltz with bashir
i am certain i've forgotten one or two in there, but i have no idea how i will have time to see them all... i think some will have to be pushed back for their DVD release. i've never been so excited about a month of cinema as i am right now.
----
i have pneumonia, it turns out. i am so exhausted. it's not so bad, i guess. hopefully i am getting better at this point.
i'm really sorry i couldn't get back to everyone, i really wanted to because so many of you left thoughtful messages on my last entry. most days this week looking at the screen too long has left me dizzy so i've been lying around "resting" as per the doctor's orders, but holy shit is resting boring. well, i guess it wouldn't be if i was able to read or do something else productive that doesn't take too much effort.
i wish i had all of the films that i've always wanted to see to hand, i think that would be the only cure for the boredom of resting. if only there was netflix in canada.
these photos are from some months ago... i do very much love living in vancouver.
it's still a shock to me when i look at my residency card and realise that i am here to stay.
there are so many films coming out this month that i want to go and see. i never really get to go to the pictures very much... maybe just a handful times a year, or less. i want to change that. my favourite theatre in vancouver is the fifth avenue theatre. it's so old and beautiful... it looks like it's straight out of one of my favourite films. it only has three screens, but that's the way they always were until i was probably about 13 and the big cineplexes started popping up in England. i should take some photos of the fifth avenue place sometime...
the films i can't wait to see this month are:
milk
the boy in the striped pajamas
quantum of solace (james bond, duh)
the day the earth stood still (yes, well, you should all know i am a science fiction junkie)
doubt (LOVE PSH)
seven pounds
yes man (i know, i know - but i love jim carey)
the spirit
gran torino
waltz with bashir
i am certain i've forgotten one or two in there, but i have no idea how i will have time to see them all... i think some will have to be pushed back for their DVD release. i've never been so excited about a month of cinema as i am right now.
----
december 3rd 2002 i took my clothes off in a park and was photographed doing so. 10 sets of my own, several thousand comments, 203 testimonials, 300+ sets that i've photographed and 6 years later here i am still updating my journal.
do me a favour and don't read those old journals. it's almost embarrassing and i'm not even sure i'm the same person i was back then. i lived in south wales, i was in a band that seemed to be going places, i was running my own clothing business and racking up obscene amounts of debt. i was possibly the unhappiest i've ever been. and along came suicidegirls. i was a member for a few months until a certain person told me i'd make a great SG and that was that.
i've moved house at least 8 times since then (4 moves in just one year) and now i am thousands and thousands of miles away from where i grew up. i've travelled more than i could ever dream and i've met some of the most important people in my life as a result of both this website and consequences that begun with events related to the website.
suicidegirls has pretty much been the centre of my life for all of these years (not to mention my main job for over 4 of them). and it is pretty incredible.
------------
back to the current, i'm horribly sick again. i feel like i haven't been healthy in over a year now and as it gets better something brings me back to being ill. today it's the cold sweats, sore throat, aching limbs and stomach cramps. but you don't really need to know all this... i just want to be better.
and everything looks better at sunset
thanks for all of the birthday wishes, it really made my day!
----
do me a favour and don't read those old journals. it's almost embarrassing and i'm not even sure i'm the same person i was back then. i lived in south wales, i was in a band that seemed to be going places, i was running my own clothing business and racking up obscene amounts of debt. i was possibly the unhappiest i've ever been. and along came suicidegirls. i was a member for a few months until a certain person told me i'd make a great SG and that was that.
i've moved house at least 8 times since then (4 moves in just one year) and now i am thousands and thousands of miles away from where i grew up. i've travelled more than i could ever dream and i've met some of the most important people in my life as a result of both this website and consequences that begun with events related to the website.
suicidegirls has pretty much been the centre of my life for all of these years (not to mention my main job for over 4 of them). and it is pretty incredible.
------------
back to the current, i'm horribly sick again. i feel like i haven't been healthy in over a year now and as it gets better something brings me back to being ill. today it's the cold sweats, sore throat, aching limbs and stomach cramps. but you don't really need to know all this... i just want to be better.
and everything looks better at sunset
thanks for all of the birthday wishes, it really made my day!
----
have you ever had so much to say that you just sit back and say nothing at all? yeah, that happens to me a lot. more than even i realised until now.
and still i'll sit here in silence. it's infinitely preferable to the alternative of blabbering on until everyone is just sick of my voice.
the only way i've seen new york yet.
these photos remind me of just a few of the people i miss so badly.
traditionally my birthdays have been a bit of a wash. i say traditionally because the bum ones outnumber the good ones, but that's not to say i don't have some wonderful memories. every day i have new memories to lock away and treasure and after all a birthday is just another day to collect them. my last few birthdays have been the best. i just wish this particular one i could be closer to my friends, but they are scattered around the world.
edit: it's not my birthday until tomorrow! (27th)
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and still i'll sit here in silence. it's infinitely preferable to the alternative of blabbering on until everyone is just sick of my voice.
the only way i've seen new york yet.
these photos remind me of just a few of the people i miss so badly.
traditionally my birthdays have been a bit of a wash. i say traditionally because the bum ones outnumber the good ones, but that's not to say i don't have some wonderful memories. every day i have new memories to lock away and treasure and after all a birthday is just another day to collect them. my last few birthdays have been the best. i just wish this particular one i could be closer to my friends, but they are scattered around the world.
edit: it's not my birthday until tomorrow! (27th)
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