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I live in a man's world.fact.I love my job more than anything.Sometimes I feel bad(for others ?!) earning my living with my hobbies.I'm a technic and music freak. usually my day starts in following way: Hey, I'm responsible for your sound tonight. sometimes I also fix chairs,cords...or what ever I gotta do...I have no problem with that...yes I know how to use a Di box...thanks.I've been doing music since I am a lil gal.I have seen and I was standing on more stages than most of you will ever be in life. I know how sound rely on different rooms.I love working with people...and most of them are really respectful...so are the organizers...If it's not us doing the booking.But sometimes, on days like yesterday, its a fine line between staying respectful and to "man" up. So at which point may I stand my opinion even if it means to get into a fight. Hard to say.All I learned is that, as a woman in that biz, you gotta be twice as harsh.I realized: the more porfessional the bands the more they appreciate your work and the less they judge you. If you don't even know how to use your fckng amp don't tell me how to do my job. And if you have never seen me working before and if your a misogynistic sick fuck: don't bring another engineer, telling me you'll pay him for also doing sound while I'm actually scheduled for the night.I will pack my stuff an go and fuck you very much for a free evening.The past weeks I was trying to care about everything and everybody.I was kind and very open for the first time, but for gods sake it makes me vulnurable. Yesterday tought me to become more distanced and impersonal again. It's sad, but I think nowadays people are not used to open, kind and honest people anymore.They always look for issues in their behavior even if there is none. I believe people forgot to talk. I mean the honest way. I'm not afraid of what someone thinks of me. neither at work nor in my private life. Just say it. Don't play weird games.Don't judge me behind my back.And if you don't really know me...got to know me first..got to know my work...and then judge me.And if there is any problem...be man enough and say it in my face. In a business full of men..be man enough. That's all I can say. I love my Job and what I am doing. I like being me. I am a good person. I never pretented to be so "oh goddamn evil" ...and it's the best feeling ever when a bunch of musicians come to me after a show giving thanks to me for a good sound and a plain evening. It's the best feeling ever screaming in a fucking metal band.It's the best feeling ever to have an ice gold beer in my hand, it's the best feeling ever being an engineer ."I don't mind living in a man's world as long as I can be a woman in it. "
Keep the good and let go of the bad.Stand your ground.And wherever you go take your heart with you, but don't let others smash it into pieces.
x.C.B.
DEC 09, 2012 06:46 AM
I respect that.No one gets to me so harsh unless I allow them to and I am honest,if things do not work in the conversation than I say so.
Having read this blog it reminded me of all the concerts I've been too but more so the local shows 
.
Stay strong,if people act that way to you it is because they are jealous and weak and in time they will fail but you will still take care of business.
DEC 09, 2012 11:16 AM
I know it sucks having to constantly prove your worth, because of your gender/looks/height/babyfaceness(this one is especially the case with me)/whatever, but don't you (at least on some level) also enjoy proving the naysayers wrong (because you're actually ten times better than they are)? I know I do
Let haters be haters (because that won't change, unfortunately, any time soon) and concentrate on being your best self. And keep up the good work! I don't know if it means anything, coming from a man (since I'm part of the problem, maybe), but I think it is great that there are female engineers (and not just because most male engineers are so butt-ugly 
). So, hang on in there. Music, in all its forms, is the best thing that human has come up with. And that is a fact!
DEC 09, 2012 11:39 AM
DEC 09, 2012 11:44 AM
Chauvinists, sexists and racists. Some things I just don't think will ever go away. All you can do is keep proving em' wrong, and giving em' hell.
DEC 09, 2012 04:09 PM
It's a man's world...but YOU've got strength.
YOU believe in yourself-I like that!
DEC 10, 2012 04:50 PM
DEC 10, 2012 06:10 PM
<3
DEC 10, 2012 08:34 PM
hot red lips 
DEC 11, 2012 05:42 AM
DEC 11, 2012 06:54 AM
wow, you are amazing. love your spirit and your love of what you do. you really are lucky. I wish you the very best
DEC 11, 2012 04:15 PM
DEC 11, 2012 05:59 PM
In any job, there's always someone to be a jackass... Unfortunately. And even more unfortunately, sometimes we're forced to deal with them.
Don't let it get to you. If someone wants to be a jackass, fuck them and their immature behaviour. Being a woman doesn't make you any less of a professional than you are and no one can tell you otherwise.
I'm guessing it was some jerkwad from a band who thinks he's some big shit because of being in a band or possibly a whole band on that description. Screw him or screw them, whatever fits best. Keep your spirits up.
Cheers!
