I'm sitting here in my new apartment in Columbus watching The Soup and finally updating. I'm not sure where to start. Perhaps the apartment thing...

It's a duplex in a nice neighborhood. Fully equipped with front porch, backyard, basement, faux fireplace, claw-foot tub, and three other friends. There's two guys, early twentiesish, who live on the other side of the house. They're very nice. They feed us, gave us the password to their internet, and gave us the 411 on the neighborhood.
I'll be all moved in by the end of this month.

I bought the Tibetan Book of the Dead. And cowboy sheets for my new bed.

About an hour ago I put together a photo album. Divided into sections by friends followed by pictures of me and my family in chronological order from baby to present.

Why are you interested in reading this? Photo album.... really?

I almost hit a deer the other day. It was scary as hell. I remember thinking, "Shit. I've never hit a deer before." Thankfully, that statement is still true.

My new favorite gum is Orbit Citrusmint.

My sister bought me an onyx bracelet a month or so ago. She's getting into the hippie yoga stuff in college thanks to her hippie yoga teacher who told her this bracelet would help with grief, adapting, and self-control. These are the reasons she told me why she bought it for me. I looked up more information and this is what I found:
Onyx jewelry when worn is believed to enhance self-confidence, enhance a sense of responsiblity and increase one's self-esteem. Onyx is also believed to enhance one's consistency, focus and bring about a feeling of detachment. It also helpss one on the path of spirituality. People usually wear onyx jewelry to ward away negativity. In India, gemologists recommend onyx as a protective measure for harmonious relationships, thus keeping away any probability of disturbances or differences in one's.

Neato.

Oh. My BFF is having a baby. It's a girl, Lady Faye, and she's due September 9. Now I'll have a mini-BFF.
If my name was Lady Faye, I'd get it tattooed across my knuckles.

I watched the Star Wars Robot Chicken last night. It was hilarious.
"And that was the best day of my life..."
"What about the day I was born?"
"No. Not even close."

Okay. I'm done updating although it's not fully updated but at least you get the jist.

I've been sitting here at the computer, indian-style, for so long my right foot is completely numb. Completely numb is the best. Not the pin needle, prickly numb that shoots an intense sensation up into your calf when your foot is touched. I'm talking about when my foot feels ten sizes too big without feeling anything at all. Someone could shank my foot right now for all I care.

I have certainly been gone for a considerable amount of time. It was near Valentine's Day when I last updated. Crazy. I would like to say it is because I am busy with all kinds of neat things, but I'm not really. I've simply been trying to entertain myself with things other than television and internet. I signed up to go on a ride along with the local police department to have something different to do. They told me they would call me when I was able to go but that has not happened. I plan on checking up on it on one of my days off. Little girls like me must use persistance or else we never get taken seriously.

I took pictures of downtown last night hoping to capture some sort of inspiration from this town. I am going to do a painting for all the pictures I took.









Not very good quality, I know, but I'm also not a photographer. Plus, I'm only using them as a reference.


Yesterday I had my family watch Borat for Easter. I love the fact that my family can sit and watch that movie together... and laugh at all the right times. Although, they seemed to not like the naked fighting too much.

Here's a picture of my jellyfish tattoo...



... it's a bit blurry. Sorry about that.

Alright. I'm starving. I'm off to the fridge to find some easter dinner leftovers. mmm.

I'm not in school but when your county is under a level 3 snow warning, it's a snow day for everyone. No driving with the excpetion for emergencies... and I don't believe the authorites will consider my dwindling supply of Hostess HoHo's (individually wrapped) an emergency. Although it's a very big deal to me.

Maybe it's for the best; I've needed an entire day to myself to work on writing and finish a drawing I started last week. So far in the day I have completed these tasks: did dishes, made food for my mom and I, read, and took a nice long bath. That's it. I am the queen of procrastination. I had two things to do and have yet to do them. I'm sure it'll get done after I update. Hopefully.

Butt and I were talking about how weird and awkward it would be to give out pictures of yourself out of the high school setting... with writing on the back, "Butt, You are a great friend. Don't ever change. Love, Me." Therefore, we think it would be a good idea to do this... and we will.

Since the last time I updated I got two new tattoos. "Writing chooses you; you don't choose it" below the creases of my reverse elbows. And the blackwork of a jellyfish on the right side of my ribs. I'm getting the color done next week and I'll have pictures then. I'll warn you though, it is badass.

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day. How exciting [please hit sarcasism button now]. I'm not a big fan of this holiday. Makes me think about bad memories and how I have a knack for fucking things up. Not that I wish things would have turned out differently... I just wish I wouldn't have hurt him the way I did. It's been two years and I still feel like shit about it. And for anyone keeping track, two years ago tomorrow I archived myself from the site.

I do have a valentine though, which is nice, but probably won't see him because of said snow warning. Damn snow. Thanks for reminding me why I despise you so much.

Let me gush over my valentine for a moment, will you? -> Ah. He's so wonderful. I was unaware they made boys like this one. I am mad crazy about him.

I'll stop there although I could go on. I just find it hard to describe these things I'm feeling without sounding too girly.

My mind is starting to wander. Time to get off of here and write and draw.

Please. Don't make anymore comments on my first set. The comment count is eleven eleven; that is the wish number. And I wish everything I am working towards pans out. And I am hopeful.

Butt and I are getting tattoos soon. I want to get a black and grey work of my typewriter on my side with a Bukowski quote underneath, in type font. "Writing chooses you; you don't choose it." It should be expensively beautiful. Butt is getting that quote as well but first I believe he is getting a Gonzo tattoo.

I ordered three books last week: In Watermelon Sugar by Richard Brautigan, Another Roadside Attraction by Tom Robbins, and The Dharma Bums by Jack Kerouac. All for $25.49. I got Watermelon Sugar Friday and just finished it last night just in time to receive Roadside Attraction today. In Watermelon Sugar is a very strange read. I haven't fully taken it in yet and am unsure of what to say about it. I don't know if I'm in the right mindset to read Tom robbins right now. I may have to find something else to read until it feels right. I think I'm going to read somemore short stories by Bukowski until Dharma Bums gets here.

I never realized how much Paul Simon makes me want to dance until the other night. It was a wonderful night. You Can Call Me Al came on VH1. Old school pop-up video. The song took me over and I couldn't help but dance around.

Why is it that one can sit in silence for a good 20 minutes then as soon as a book is opened to read everyone has something to say? If you want to say something to me, find a worm hole and go back to that 20 minutes.

My car, Jack Salmon, has the soul of an old man in it. When it gets cold his arthritis acts up and he doesn't want to move. Let's all pray this second mechanic can finish the job and all will finally be well. That way I can vanish from this God awful town whenever the mood strikes.

I have memorized your face. There is no escaping my thoughts now.

that time i mentioned i was moving
and you said you'd help me move
i almost went out and bought some shit
so i'd need your help to move
cause i got a crush on you

remember that Halloween when i went as Jimmy Dean
you were a princess, or a gypsy, or whatever
i was James Dean
i had a crush on you

i get a yes, a no, a maybe
from the magic 8 ball of your mind
i saw your mom's Camaro
dammit girl you lookin fine
and i got a crush on you

day in, day out, same routine
you better know what you think before you say what you mean
same old, same old, season after season
baby you're the kind of thing i do without reason

the sky's an 80 ft. mirror
with a fancy bevelled edge
couldn't make it any clearer
i'm alone on this ledge
just me and my crush on you

teen-age hair-dos, bad leather
mom's apartment, ethyl cans
i wa-wa-wa-wa-wanna
take you to the dance
cause i got a crush on you

well i'm a sixteen year old hitler
with a troubled lovesick mind
do you get the picture
i am of the dangerous kind
when i got this crush on you

some girls make me reach for the bottle
some girls make me reach for the sky
you've got me reaching in every direction for
just one good reason why
i gotta have this crush on you

that time i mentioned i was moving
and you said you'd help me move




[Start actual entry here]

I've become very routine lately. Wake up around 3 pm. and on most days I have to work at 4... so I go there. Sit around work and read and screw off until close (midnight on weekdays and 1 am on weekends). Come home. Eat something. Watch a movie I've taped on TCM. Play pool on my new pool table (fuckin a). Check emails. Text my crush. Type something. Sleep. Yeah, that's almost everynight. Everyonce in awhile I'll have company. Very boring, I know. But I'm very happy with it. Well. Not the working part. That blows. But the rest is nice.

I have written something on my typewriter everynight this year so far. And I will keep this up for the rest of the year. Hopefully it gives me the practice I need to eventually write a story of some kind.

I finished Bukowski's Notes of a Dirty Old Man. Amazing. I suggest everyone read it. Now I'm almost done with Siddhartha by Herman Hesse. Also very good. I'm not sure what I'll be reading next. Any suggestions?

I don't think I'm alone when I say I'd like to see more and more planets fall under the ruthless domination of our solar system.

Let's start with Christmas. Some of my favorite gifts include: a vintage portable Royal typewriter, a national geographic moon that you hang on your wall and it lights up all the moon phases in order, a cigarette case with my initials engraved, an ipod nano, and a subscription to Psychology Today. It was a fantastic Christmas filled with family bonding and moments with my friends.



Is it wrong that I still laugh my ass off at that video?

New Years I played pool, drank, sang Meatloaf Kareoke (How is that word spelled?!?), bonded with some people I've lost touch with, and watched My Name is Earl.

I really could go indepth with all this but I don't have the time right now. I must walk over to Butt's house to hang out (my car is sick and is getting fixed right now). Yeah. This is a lame entry... but there's a video, so that should help out.

So I cheated a little bit with the last entry. Who cares? It was a kick ass video and anyone who disagrees must answer to me. (Actually it's not that big of a deal. Like it. Don't like it. I don't care.)

I decided to move to Columbus with my best friend, Butt. Beforehand though, we need to save up money and since working sucks ass, we came up with a BRILLIANT plan. We are going to become pool hustlers. I bought a used cue for $10.00 and found a hat solely used for the purpose of hustling. We've been practicing and I'm seeing some improvement. Soon we'll be rolling in the dough and rolling out of this God forsaken town.

Started reading Notes From a Dirty Old Man by Bukowski. Very nice. Very strange. And very inspiring. I've been writing alot more late at night while everyone is sleeping because of that book.

Instead of mousetraps, what about baby traps? Not to harm the babies, but just to hold them down until they can be removed?

I have all of my "holiday" shopping done. I spent one entire day shopping and got it all finished in one clean swoop. I'm highly impressed with myself. Now I can coast for a couple of weeks while everyone else is pulling out their hair.

Boy have I had a great couple of weeks. Maybe closer to a month. There's been laughing, drinking, smiling, kissing, holding, and pool playing. I couldn't ask for more.

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."

Put on your seatbelt..... I wanna try something.

Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra? If God dropped acid, would he see people? If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? Ah. The great mysteries of life.

Last weekend I feel in love with one of the best live bands I've ever seen:
Centro-matic
I watched them twice, two days in a row. I met their drummer, Matt, and guitarist/bassist, Mark.
Matt is an extremely intelligent guy. I wish I could have conversations with him atleast once a week.


We are the music makers. And we are the dreamers of dreams.


When you make a life change, you should expect alot of "putting in" before you can take anything "out". Lately it's been hard for me to remember that. If change is good for you, then why is it so fucking hard?

If life deals you lemons, why not go kill someone with the lemons (maybe by shoving them down his throat).