i feel seeepy today.... i's goes and takes me a nap. ni ni!
-bEe

i love my new set! yeah!
thx everyone for the comments! you kids are too good to me!
-bEe

hey new set goes up in the morn be there or be ...uuhh stung by me ----beeeee

off to ruin the world bzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Now lets talk about people and how much the f:in' population likes to judge. Do we really live in a time where men and women have to be that separate frm one another? I mean come on now feel me on this, please. I don’t know about the rest of the world but for the past few years I have felt completely androgynies--esk. So point being that when I wanna do somfin I do it, and people play it out and judge it as if I am 'acting like a boy' just cuz I don’t wait for a dude to come along and marry me or rather pay my bills. I just think its lame that just cuz I take care of my own shit I am a 'boyish type' I am not a f:ing dumb ass who runs around not thinking about what i am doing' or sayin' to anyone. I just don’t fear what I feel. Or fear what I wanna do. I happen to trust myself. This is all comin' up cuz a close friend of mine wants me to play games--like don’t give into what you wanna do with another person cuz they will loose interest. Well then I guess they are not worth it. I hate the 'new affect' people have. I like to admire people don’t get me wrong--but I am not going to f:ck every hawt dude I meet. Duh-- I have been on plenty of dates since my move home, and none have been to my standard in my interactions. I mean for f:ck sake I shop around for toilet paper I may as well shop around for one i want to share my time with.

Example: say if I wanna kiss some one in a club--I am going to do it. I want to share moments with people just as much as the next person. I don’t look deep into that and its not my issue if that person cant handle that. Like don’t put yourself in the position if you cant handle all out comes.
Another: if I wanna go home with some one--THEN I F:IN' WILL! IF I WANNA SLEEP WITH THEM, I WILL! IF I WANNA GO EAT PANCAKES AT 4 AM, I WILL!

Like say if I were a dude my friends would be high five:in' me but cuz I don’t have a dick I am being lectured. Lame lame lame. The one thing I can say is that I don’t try to make anyone ever feel as if they owe me anything. And I will express the way that I will, and if one cant handle the heat then get the f:ck outta the kitchen bitch!

That’s all on that issue. I get so irked at times.

okay--

why do days only have 24 hours can we boost it up to like 48? then i could get a lot more stuff done. i never get to pick up my room anymore and i have clothing all over my bed. when i get home from work i am drained. i try going out but shit i get soo f:ing sleepy and then it is hard to wake up in the morn. i didnt want to get outta bed this morn, no really i wish i was still in bed, it was warm, now i am cold brrrrrr. i needs me some sleep!!!

i am going ot move in with brYn for all of march-- so after that i need to find a place, any SG's lookin for a room mate who pays bills on time? i wanna live in west hollywood or down town. anywhere by the subway really. or close to it. i have to use it all the time now, =]

i love SG!!! bettie i want to marry you--yous so supa hawt. =]

-bEe

i have had no time these days i find myself awake at this hour (5 am) thinkin' i have to get everything done. my weeks have turned into days. meaning i have 52 days a years. i work so many hours i feel like i never go home. and when i do go home i hate living in my house(room mate issues), i found my own place just need to come up with deposit. 900$

the photo shoot went well but i only got to be at the saturday shoot for like an hour! i wanted to be there all day cute boys runnin around half nude. yum!

i need to come up with master plan on how to get into my own place. hmmm...
oh i got a spray tan for fun, my boss paid for it. lol. just to see what it woudl look like and it goes awayin 7 days. i am tan and i never have been, and it will be gone in 7 days. how funny.


i just told my room mate that i wanna live alone, he is pissed. but what can i say, its what i think is best for me. i cant live in this place anymore. drives me nuts that i can clean a house and the very next day its a mess. plus i will be in and out of town a lot and i need my own place.

great now when i try to come up with this all in the next couple of weeks.cuz my room mate is pissed. but i have warned him a lot that if he keeps doing what he does i am out. so he kept on and i am out!

okay done with the search thanks guys for you help. =]
-b-

HEY BOYS AND GIRLS IN LA!

i am lookin' for model for Lip Service clothing line!

females:
you MUST be a size 5 and taller then 5'5

males:
you MUST be a size 30-32 and taller then 5'9

please send photos to suicidebee@hotmail.com

you must know how to model. hit me up!


-bEe

i think this world is so wonderful. no matter how hard it seems to come down, life will always work itself out.

this past year (2003) i have learned more about love, beauty and honor then i ever thought i could.

the best part of all these realizations, is the knowing that this following year(2004) will bring me just that much closer to my goals and dreams. i am almost to where i want to be and i have it in site...

'til then i will be workin' my tail off to get what i want outta this world.

-end of enlightenment (j/k)
(see i am makin' a play on my idealism dont confuse it with thinkin' i am better, thank you)

PS: i added three pictures