I meant out as in end of transmission, NOT ABORT MISSION!!!

there are so many things left to be done. --dont panic.

taken from the book SPEAK TRUTH TO POWER - Kerry Kennedy
-He said, "Do you accept that we are stronger than you?
I said, "Only to the extent that you have the police, the army. But my ideas are stronger than yours. What I am fighting for is greater than what you are trying to protect."
He said, "In that case you have to die"-

i have just been momentarily in between two locked doors so not much could be done except throwing socks at premeditated areas at shapes on the walls.

all in All weathered from the storm that quickly then gradually then suddenly shifted directions inwards. I said, loud or silenced in warning If you shoot me down i hope you fucking aim at me both. And they tried. Half a miss. I am a hobblin little i dont know wearin that dirty old dress that rots apart a little more the more the days are set with a decaying set of wings i found in a puddle in a rainstorm next to an empty bus stop and i remembered what shone with what stars and we were happy, we who didnt know each others faces or anything of that material matter. but if you know the outcome and you read the book anyway, well what a waste of time that feels like. You just have to walk quicker to avoid the forever catastrophic tumblings of towers.. concrete and brick smashing like a warzone wanting to shatter bone all because of poorly constructed and half assed built skyscrapers. Metaphorically speaking or so. I am a rabbit. Feed me things. And then i was fed and fed and fed and stars and swirls and i didnt get the answers i was hoping for until a phone call came and just to hear that voice it wasnt hidden it was just a little farther away. the fireworks were high and i was lost in this fucked up city it goes up and down and in swirls and sideways til it felt like i was in sensory deprevation chambers for a good amount of time to not remember what was what before and the ground was shaking and well i guess it was i who was sitting on boomboom letting the lackluster vibrations fall into dreams. the sun came and i felt like somehow the end of the world had happend and i wasnt left the note because the entirety was quiet and there was no sign of life.
Little dog has gone feral because i dont particulary listen to the advice of domination and she rips pieces off me growling in defiance and that blue thing that attaches me to her so i bring her somewhere that is nice and she will chase her tail and dig holes for bugs and she will feel better. I get her little pack spirit so i dont try to break it like most owners do even as she rips ladies handbags apart with a wry smile and chases her tail into traffic. its funny, it is, but i couldnt lose her to that sort of system line.
One (1) garbage.
One (1) pita.
Cheese
Lettuce
Turkey
Girl, Rabbit, Dog, Happy.

We were a few hundred strong, and even a marching band made noise.
Little kids with slingshots, bigger kids with rocks. We cheered when they set the helicopter out. We booed when the riot shields came out. They did a fine job at dispersing us, trying to quiet any form of opposition. My friend turned worried eyes towards me, and I told her all would be fine because we had to bail someone out of jail, so we would not be starting any trouble. We were there to gather (some passivly, some not) against police brutality, and the new rules prohibiting people from sleeping in the public parks, among thousands of other reason. (Up to a $400 fine, for being homeless and sleeping on PUBLIC property). We found ourselves between two football lineups of militarized crazed cops. They started marching towards each other, and we backed up, backing up until they charged. AHHH!!! I let out an excited nervous yell, but didnt see the other 3 who materialized seemingly out of nowhere. One smashed my friend in the shoulder, who fell to the ground. I ran towards her to pull her away, and found myself in the same position. Batons hit my back over and over and over again, breaking my tailbone faster than falling on it. I looked over to my friends head on the curb, being stomped on. I tried to crawl over to her, trying to ignore all the pain, to at least cover her, feeling sorry that I had said nothing would happen and not to worry. DONT FUCKNG MOVE! They yelled beating us both, two girls who were peacefully protesting on the sidewalk even. GET UP! They yelled at us, while kicking our ribs in and breaking her glasses. My friend cried that her shoulder was broken, to please stop, please please please stop. GET UP! They yelled again while kicking us down. I did a few funny sumersaults with the force of being shoved. Two comrades pick us up and THEY come again, to kick us down. They would pick us up, throw us on the ground, and start the kicking and batons all over again.
The media chose their images and coverage very carefully. The three interviews I did for the local news, where were they? The videos of us getting beaten violently, were where they? The countless photographers who were in attendance, what happend to them, and why has nothing been released in our favour, to show exactly what we were shouting against, exactly what happend to us?

I got rejected.
Help a girl get paid.
APATHY - GRUNGE

run run run! the train comes while were sleeping awake to sunshine and the warmest day i have seen yet this year. we fight the law and the law wins... again. No walkietalkies so i can walk free as I feel without them knowing they should have taken me. bahahahaa we say and my fine that i could never pay anyway will see the end of its days as the toilet paper that it is.
The trucker goes in between trying to weasel our bodies one by one. No attention given. We walk away 3 hours difference and then I dont know where I am. A few `what city am i in?` and a few crazed looks. first bus stop I see and am happy that I made it. Cats eating dog food with big heads. Rude motherfuckin city!!! Traffic at night. Laundry and Shawarma pawn shops and all sorts of other things that make up a street with no meaning if you watch. I think of termites and daddylonglegs and how flowers grow in fastforward motion. Chewing tadpoles. TimHortons for some marvelous crack in an unrecyclable cup. Grown next to tabacco fields i taste. Friends! Yes. We go stumblin and I say HEY Look at that pack of Small Dogs comin to attack us!! Closer closer and 3 rabid raccoons foaming. Im laughing soo much excitment as they battle it out and we run around not quite sure if I should play too or run from infectious teeth. Down a street and he is breaking all the mirrors off cars and she runs away but its all slumber in the end as I stare a turtle in the eye. INK. inkinkink. inkinkink. 2 feathers that are long. My favourite tattoo person kicks motherfucking ass. And, well, he doesnt say anything while I scream.
DO go here if you are ever in the smogy city area: ]BLACKLINES I get to watch his sleeve get darker and i think of sharks. Im somewhere at sometime and the city has a Miami haze the sun coming up and skyscrapers remind me of beaches but you definatly can not swim here. I dont think an amoeba of life lives in that water. Quebec has succeeded much better in conservation. But much better doesnt mean perfect. More green.
Ohhh theres an over here too and I get a phonecall YOUR PUPPY WAS BORN very early I hear so im on a 5am bus with a broken tailbone yellin at tourists who walk slow. POPPOP two shots i keep stare at the cracks in the pavement that get faster as rubber speeds away. I dunno where I want to live. Why do i have to choose just one spot. Life`s tough. Warmer weather I feel it at the tip of my tongue. Almost. The legal system is too slow. Stupid invisible line. Stupid capitalism. You should buy the tshirt, yeah. And especially the rubber bracelet. ONLY THEN, will we attain world peace and reap the benefits of a sinless life. Polluted rotting fruit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this dance and wear wierd shit movement is starting to make me hate you or the other way around. And the concept of people going to these things to bring people home. It is all really too high over my head. secret cameras and flash flash flash. Where to people put those fucking things? I managed to get one.

One of me an Mulot stumbly visual induced bathroom lining everywheres by sweet girl MaryJane, one of those doll lookin pretties] We sometimes knock down people on snowshoes while i make them afraid ill puke on them.
But HERE is one i like better that DUSO took. (he just became excited to have credit) Im in there.

I think thats it.
ohhh ohh yeah and dont take fake armory through customs??? Apparently their not too keen on that

bahahahaha.
I want I want I want to have fun too.

every amoeba within ime is going to try and get this out
this is a once in a lifetime pooptunity for you|||!!!
stupid french keyboards. youd know what i meant ieff you lived here.
i posted some copyrighted apparently```v ideos up there so check it out
im lost in the sound
they got dleeted off youtube but nooobody ever suspects the suicidegirl!!!!!
typing is fucked up.
blood veins flesh skeLETON.
im only doing this for another month okay?
tis whole internet world. i prostitute my soul to you!!!
thats WHAT THIS IS OKAY
im just tired of paper im tired of SHOES and beasts and veganism.
i want to tear my skin off. its amazing in can still understand that this will get to you.
whoeever yo uare.
my eyes are leekin.g.
will this get cesnsured????? perhaps.
i want lto live within the bass. right in the light that brings it to our heart.
transmission is almost over!!!
in the stars.
i have an email! it has wings. black raven wings. feathers. dust. boop boop her eyes are black. i can see the blue in there somewhere. THE PHONE IS RINALINIGNGEG.
i cant bea rit!!!!! the reality that is microscopic!!! if i press on one box another will come up with more choices.
WE ARE ROBOTS.
PROGAMED.
i want to deprgam!!!! DO YO UHEAR
if i look into his eyes, ill fall back to the world again. but distance is anothe rword for FAR!!! or im not there yet.
its always YET!!!! im soooooo cold if i had wings id be beside a cactus.
i dont understand thatn stand is a under of a stand? WTF.
why do you understand wtf.
im running out o fhere in SOCKS. one blue. one red. no sweater.black black says the sky in april .

walk out of my 1 month home. i have limited time here, im told. for whatever reason i fail to care about.
i feel like trash shouting. You think you know me!?!? You have no idea!!!! and have a falling-out junkie scream fest. but everyone thinks that way about themselves. i realize words have little importance when directed to others and drink a silent response.
Ever feel like your response to certain stilmuli is already decided beforehand? I can answer questions like everyone else and react to what your doing to me but sometimes im lazy and i just pick something from the drop-down list to make you go on with things. Horrible.
i wonder if running to a purpose will change things, or if thoughts are already burned mirrored to each other stuck there until i decide my time has been long enough. i dream of sweltering heat and jungle leaves maybe being a saviour.
im not a fucking poet. i think you have all just not realized i failed to grasp language or study its importance.
i made an appointment to get out of this waking life feeling, trying not to listen to that crunch crunch styrophoam noise boots make through snow. i fall down hard. on my two-day fresh broken tailbone. i lay there breathing carefully to wait for pain to reside and focus. people are stepping over me. a man falls behind me. i lay there like a piece of gum and think about having a picnic with the orange in my backpack.
Whatever. There are children in somalia holding AK`s trying not to watch their mama die from Aids and starvation, so therefore a broken ass is nothing too serious to lament about.
I put one foot in front of the other and repeat until i come to a dark lump next to a boarded up church. Everyone else is passing by him too. He isnt just a hobo taking a nap in puddle, cause his face is lying right in it.
Hellooo? I ask the lump.
I roll him out of the puddle. His eyes are rolled back. I put him on his side.
I look up at the rest of the crowd. I hate people. Individuals I can stand, but people, thats a no go in my department. The situations that come afterwards are very baffling and hard to comprehend and leaf through, but two hours later I find the man getting kicked in the head by two cops, his face in the snow, arms tied back with tie wraps.
I tell the police that I think they would get calm, clear answers out of him if they just get HIS FACE OUT OF THE SNOW. A man with a long black trenchcoat proceeds to follow me around but fails to understand that it takes much, much more than that to make me feel uncomfortable.

Game: Dodge trees !

Huron nests. I should have left with them.



In other news, I went dogsledding, have continued puking in all sorts of public and private areas thus concluding to try and accept this daily bodily function that is the tictok clock, and final thoughts i guess ive decided is that i miss dreamers and skippers and all others who i dont see or meet anymore since ive become a slave to whatever-describing-word-youd-like-to-end-this-with.

So wandering around in the snowflakes, I decided to throw myself into some sort of government assistance.
Id seen the building, and the people huddled outside of it, the lost and found box always already raided, so i took the elevator up. Im passing all these signs, wondering where the welfare office might be hiding, and end up asking the Janitor. "Youre standing in front of it" oh. A big blue sign saying "Social Assistance." whaat? is that supposed to be funny?
So, after the 1 week scavenger hunt they send you on, and prying into every aspect of your personal life, I get a check. WHOOP. So, after gorging my face with delicious foods I always want to eat, I went out in search of somewhere to live.
With all the money given to me, there is not one apartment that I can afford. Not even a room. Not even a hotel for random stays. What kind of help is this shit? Thank you, Government of Canada. You just carry on pretending to be the states, bombing people across the world, giving hockey players multimillion dollar salaries, and dont any of you worry about lil ol me. Back to the drawing board.
There is a HUGE rediculous difference in my life. You should see what eating good food is like. I feel like a completly different person. I have energy and thoughts are more clear. What a difference eating good food makes.
Theres a really fucking wicked girl coming onto the site, I dont know what name she has picked out but you better believe we will be dirtying it up a bit more on here. We were hungry. Mouse took three random cans and put them into a pot. Chicken noodle soup, strange squares of what is supposed to be vegetables but is really just cubes of orange and green, and a tin of cat food. I couldnt even begin to explain it, but the night ended, as morning came, with us dancing to Bikini Kill with cans of peas on our heads.
If you remember, I wrote some words almost exaclty a year ago, and its featured with some new photos taken last night.
You can see them at this website :
Lapin Junkies
Heres a sneaky preview

Hitchiking anywhere is always an epic adventure anyhow. This run was deceitful to begin with.

First mistake: trusting the weather network.
Clear skies! Sunny temperate seasonal highs!
AHEM Says me walking the side of the highway in the snowstorm with the 2 inch visibility.
I see no more road.
I turn my black jacket inside out orange.
I hug the treeline because the highway is filled with drivers who think they can see, and nobody is picking me up anyfuckinggoddammhow.
The snowflakes so many make it hard to see which way im going, and all the trees are around me and the same.
My toes get all crumply and numb. I am a limping animal next to the forest wall but I keep walking walking, because somewhere, eventually, I will find a heater in the corner of some random restaurant/roadside attraction and give it all my attention. And that is all i think about.
The moon is very big, very bright, and low in the sky. The big trucks zoom by and I wonder which one will skid sideways and send me flying with a crunchy noise.
The time says 2am. It was about when I stopped feeling cold. I stand in one spot for a bit, im not sure how long, and think that is a very odd time for the sun to be waking up at. Somehow, minutes between 2 and 7 am are completly obliterated and gone gone.
A highway worker zooms by me talking to a raven, which at that point in my deleriousness i thought was a stray dog. I do remember making noises to it, and wondering what a stray dog was doing in the middle of nowhere, as Im sure he was wondering what a stray human was doing in the middle of nowhere, which could explain all the strange noises it was making to me.
I was confused as to how the worker saw me, I hadnt expected anybody to ever pick me up again. I had forgotten I was there which i suppose was sorta comforting given the current state of things. We sit in his truck with the heat thrown at me and I see I am not coherent anymore because of his expressions.
Remain quiet.
I keep going because somewhere there is a little freckled marble and white rabbit waiting for me just 3 hours north. I am walking not counting all the tires passing by me.
I am asleep in the last car ride before I even say oh why hello fancy meeting you here. I am asleep still.
My toes and legs are purple, a stepdown from the previous blue, and nursing my rotten hitchiking stomach, which is just an excessive combination of dumpstered fast food, bad coffee and cheap cigarettes.
Kickin my free ticket around in the wind, as always.