I'll start: (video) I like when she talks about butter. MMMM flux and butter.

by Blogbot (image) [Image: Quakerninja-02 / SG: Vanessa] SG Member / Artist Name: Quakerninja / a.k.a. Daniel Newman Mission Statement: I'm a member of SG's Fan Art Group, and wanted to do a one-a-day for a year challenge, so I signed up with the Art House Co-op to do a sketchbook a month. more

by Blogbot


[Image: Quakerninja-02 / SG: Vanessa]

SG Member / Artist Name: Quakerninja / a.k.a. Daniel Newman

Mission Statement: I'm a member of SG's Fan Art Group, and wanted to do a one-a-day for a year challenge, so I signed up with the Art House Co-op to do a sketchbook a month. The “80 Girls Project” seen here is book 5 of the series. I bit off more then I could chew to be honest and fell behind. The only thing that got me back on track was drawing something I really like, and I can't think of many other things besides cheesecake I like more the Suicide Girls.


[Image: Quakerninja-03 / SG: Cruella]

Medium: Ball point pen, India ink, occasionally markers and pencils.

Aesthetic: Straight inkin' Lincoln.


[Image: Quakerninja-04 / SG: Kraven]

Notable Achievements: These are quite silly ones. I hold the world record for “fastest time to draw Homer Simpson’s head 10 times,” “most chicken faces drawn in a minute,” and “most Penrose triangles drawn in 30 seconds.” Ok, they aren't really world records, they are from Recordsetter.com, but I'm still proud of them.


[Image: Quakerninja-07 / SG: Kohana]

Why We Should Care: Blend is a good word for it, but it means more to me then you might think. Blending not only in the sense of values, or shading, but more broad, the blending of ideas, medium and technique are where style comes from. By striping out the gray tones and just having hard-edged black shadows and white areas. I was able to get a woodcut style just by eliminating the value. You often hear people say that style is important, but they never say what that is. Style to me is a result of the choices I make in a drawing or painting. There are many forks on the road to becoming the kind of artist you want to be, some of them are quit difficult due to lack of experience, education, talent, perseverance, and so forth. I admire people who have the balls to aim for perfection but the danger in my opinion is that it can become overwhelming and that pressure can stop productivity. I know it's not the perfect artwork, but it doesn't have to be. Everything I finish gives me satisfaction, and helps me improve.


[Image: Quakerninja-08 / SG Vanessa]

I Want Me Some: You can see more of my work and buy it via my website, online store, and Redbubble Shop. Also friend/follow me on Facebook and Twitter.


[Image: Quakerninja-12 / SGs: Glitch, Aadie and Kohana]


[Image: Quakerninja-14 / SG: Katerina]


[Image: Quakerninja-15 / SG: Cruella]

Thanks to Ryker for recommending Quakerninja's work.

***

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by Steven-Elliot Altman (SG Member: Steven_Altman) Our Fiction Friday serialized novel, The Killswitch Review, is a futuristic murder mystery with killer sociopolitical commentary (and some of the best sex scenes we’ve ever read!). Written by bestselling sci-fi author Steven-Elliot Altman (with Diane... more

by Steven-Elliot Altman (SG Member: Steven_Altman)

Our Fiction Friday serialized novel, The Killswitch Review, is a futuristic murder mystery with killer sociopolitical commentary (and some of the best sex scenes we’ve ever read!). Written by bestselling sci-fi author Steven-Elliot Altman (with Diane DeKelb-Rittenhouse), it offers a terrifying postmodern vision in the tradition of Blade Runner and Brave New World...

By the year 2156, stem cell therapy has triumphed over aging and disease, extending the human lifespan indefinitely. But only for those who have achieved Conscientious Citizen Status. To combat overpopulation, the U.S. has sealed its borders, instituted compulsory contraception and a strict one child per couple policy for those who are permitted to breed, and made technology-assisted suicide readily available. But in a world where the old can remain vital forever, America’s youth have little hope of prosperity.

Jason Haggerty is an investigator for Black Buttons Inc, the government agency responsible for dispensing personal handheld Kevorkian devices, which afford the only legal form of suicide. An armed “Killswitch” monitors and records a citizen’s final moments — up to the point where they press a button and peacefully die. Post-press review agents — “button collectors” — are dispatched to review and judge these final recordings to rule out foul play.

When three teens stage an illegal public suicide, Haggerty suspects their deaths may have been murders. Now his race is on to uncover proof and prevent a nationwide epidemic of copycat suicides. Trouble is, for the first time in history, an entire generation might just decide they’re better off dead.

(Catch up with the previous installments of Killswitch – see parts ONE, TWO, and THREE – then continue reading after the jump…)



[THE KILLSWITCH REVIEW – CHAPTER ONE, PART FOUR]


[BLACK BUTTONS, INC. ] 

[Previous Chapter]


Tanner gave them the high sign when they got back to BBI, and reminded Haggerty that a staff report was due upstairs. Haggerty looked at the clock and nodded, keying in his pass code to the mausoleum. The meeting was due to start momentarily. He didn’t really have time for his planned detour to the men’s room to dose a celtrex; lateness was something that was sure to have the Dragon breathing fire at him. Then again, a man about to press didn’t have much to fear from those flames. The meeting could start without him. Haggerty stepped forward, allowing the scanner to pan his retinas, and waited as four sets of interlocking gates disengaged and slid back into the floor and ceiling, revealing a permaglass wall with one narrow concave section forming an access port. Once the hypersteel gates had disappeared, Haggerty glanced back at the control panel, stamping his thumbprint against the flatscreen to turn off the remaining electronic wards, before pulling on the pair of black duratex gloves Elsa handed him. When the system sent the green light clearing him for access, Haggerty took the minthizine cases and biohazard bag from her and stood on the pressure plate in front of the access port. There was just enough room for one person to stand within its circumference. Once in place, the concavity slid open around the access port, effectively bringing Haggerty inside the room while ensuring no one else entered with him. The shield’s permaglass construction ensured that his actions would be observable by any duly assigned witnesses. Originally, two were mandated, usually the on-duty dispatcher, the reviewer’s assistant, or another reviewer. These days, little actual observation was ever done. Tanner didn’t even bother to turn his attention from his own console, though Elsa managed to keep Haggerty in her line of sight even as she headed over to a nearby decontamination sink to wash her hands and run the requisite sterilization protocols on her internal systems.

The discharged KV unit storage room was the highest security area in the building; only state-registered review agents could enter. Somewhere in this same facility a similar room held thousands of brand-new, uncalibrated units — Haggerty had been there once, his first day on the job, when he’d signed for his own — boxes without namescreens housing buttons without printscans. But the mausoleum, with its stone floor and vaulted ceilings, held only discharged black boxes: row after row and shelf after shelf of dead units. T. J. Sovereign, the man who’d designed the first box, had suggested they be recycled. This was quickly vetoed on the grounds that no one wanted a device that had been discharged. In order for it to be safe and unthreatening, it had to be clean, untarnished, sterile — and unique.

Haggerty stepped to the console, uttered the command, and waited for the program to identify his vocal pattern. A few seconds later, a pair of narrow panels slid aside, revealing freshly sterilized containment slots. He deposited the units within — evidence in the unlikely event of future challenge — and watched as the panels automatically sealed shut. Most likely, those seals would never be broken, the units’ evidence never required.

Haggerty headed for the exit sink and coded open the appropriate secure waste container beside it. He dropped the biohazard bag inside, stripped off his gloves and sent them after, then coded the container closed. Though the minthizine cases and duratex gloves made it virtually impossible for him to have picked up a single spore of contamination, he followed protocol, washing his hands once more, then returned to the access port to leave the mausoleum. He stepped from the pressure plate and the mausoleum’s four pairs of gates closed behind him for the last time.

Elsa sat at a console, sorting through data streams. She smiled at him as he made his way out of the storage room.

“I have a staff meeting,” he said.

“I’ll keep myself busy,” she replied.

* * *

“Welcome, Mr. Haggerty,” said Consuela Pitcairn, the division director, referred to in whispers as the Dragon. The sole person at the table not wearing grays, she was dressed in a stylish business suit of pale gold that featured an elegant straight skirt ending demurely at the knee, over a cream-colored synthesilk blouse. She had been with BBI since before Haggerty, and had to be nearing the century mark, but like almost every one else looked no older than thirty. Right now, she also looked annoyed.

Haggerty didn’t bother trying to excuse his lateness. He headed for the only seat available at the large round black onyx table, between Tanner and O’Connell, directly across from the new kid, Corbin, who was chewing one of her irritating cubes of gum. She had been recruited two months ago, after the union complained that three retired agents’ positions had gone unfilled far beyond contractual time limits. Management had successfully argued that there wasn’t enough work for three new agents, but the arbitrator upheld the union’s position that the contract required that at least one job be filled. Thus BBI acquired Corbin to take up the nonexistent slack and Consuela acquired a devoutly loyal agent. Because Corbin was the minimum legal employable age, thirty. This made her two decades younger than the national average for initial employment in any job, let alone this highly sought-after field. No doubt Corbin’s loyalty was also due to the fact that the field still skewed heavily toward the male demographic.

Corbin had smooth, clear skin, short dark hair, and piercing blue eyes Haggerty figured were natural. Like every other Conscientious Citizen, she was good-looking — most would probably say beautiful. But something about her left Haggerty slightly repulsed. She was smart-mouthed, certain she knew more than the experienced agents, much like Haggerty when he first joined BBI. But Corbin was hard, smug, unlikable. Her not so subtle hints that BBI would be better off if she were to take over Haggerty’s position didn’t help to foster a good working relationship, either. Haggerty’s biggest gripe was that Corbin acted as if she were doing everyone a favor by being there, that she was just killing time until something more worthy of her talents came along. Even at his most callow, Haggerty had never done that. Corbin was clearly unhappy about having to attend this meeting, her eyes darting from one object to the next; she was barely able to sit still.

“Clean presses, I assume?” Consuela said as Haggerty took his seat.

He nodded.

“Good,” she said. “Let’s get started then. Most of you know that pressage is markedly down these past few months, following a pattern that’s been growing for several years.” She smiled provocatively. “Which means some of you may be advantageously positioned for early retirement.”

Haggerty could feel Corbin’s too-blue eyes burn into his flesh. That meant Haggerty’s name was probably on the list. In most industries, the youngest employees were the first to be cut during lean times, but like the police, BBI agents suffered high burnout rates, which worked in favor of younger colleagues. No matter. She could have his job tomorrow.

“With full pension and continued benefits, of course,” Consuela went on. “BBI doesn’t forget its own.”

Tanner leaned in to whisper, “We’d benefit more from her early retirement.”

“Fat chance,” O’Connell whispered back, past Haggerty.

“I realize you’re all in perfect physical condition,” Consuela said calmly, attributing the murmuring to a mix of excitement and apprehension about her news, “but I’m calling for psychevals on each of you later this afternoon. You’ll go down alphabetically.”

“So sayeth the Dragon,” Tanner echoed, loud enough for Haggerty to overhear. Corbin’s eyes continued to target him. Haggerty gave her a thin smile. Relax, kid, you won’t have to wait much longer for my post.

“Are there any questions? Gupta?” Raj Gupta, the only person with more seniority than Haggerty, shook his head no. “O’Connell?” Another head shake. “What about you, Haggerty?”

“Nothing immediate comes to mind,” he said, leaning back in his chair and scratching his neck. “I’ll digest what you’ve told us. Maybe later I’ll have questions.”

Corbin’s eyes narrowed slightly. Was Haggerty willing to fade away quietly, without a fuss? He smiled at her, amused when she scowled back. He was tempted to make up something, just to yank Corbin’s chain, but decided it wasn’t worth the effort.

No one else had questions. The rest of the meeting was routine reporting of clean presses by mature clients — mature being defined as having reached the century mark.

An hour later, Haggerty found himself in a chair under psycheval by someone who probably knew more about him than any test could ever reveal. But conducting the evaluation was part of his job, and Haggerty knew that Doug Zabrowski never slacked off. Though that didn’t mean he liked running evaluations on his friends. His incessantly puffing on a cigalite was a clear sign he was distressed. Doug only smoked when something was bothering him.

“In my day, those things would have done serious damage to your lungs, Doug,” Haggerty said.

“In your day, anyone taking the equivalent of what you take in celtrex would be on suspension until he’d completed a detox program,” Doug retorted.

Doug Zabrowski was living proof that there was only so much plastiche could achieve. He was as good-looking as everyone else, and every bit as youthful, but there was something worn about him, something tired and solemn that caused him to close in on himself, pinching his attractive features and making them ever so slightly less so. The smoking, at least in Haggerty’s opinion, didn’t help, a fact of which he’d tried to warn his friend, off and on for the past fifty years.

Doug saw it differently. “Cigalites are safe enough for a baby, Jason, and you know it,” he said, fiddling with his setup programs.

He was right, of course. Tobacco had been detoxified decades ago, its natural poisons genetically engineered out of existence. And even had they not been, Haggerty understood that the lungs of a fully geno-immunized body could easily tolerate the abuse, and the annual stem-cell therapy all Conscientious Citizens underwent would repair any tissue damage. In the rare instance where deterioration occurred, there was always the option of having an afflicted organ regrown. No one found smoking offensive these days, whereas Haggerty’s prescription for celtrex had raised the eyebrow of his pharmacist on more than one occasion — which struck Haggerty as exceedingly unfair.

“It’s not as if I’m dosing on something recreational,” he said, unpleasant images of Tanner at his worst coming to mind. “Everyone who’s had stem therapy takes celtrex.”

“Not in the doses you use,” Doug said. “It’s meant as a telemor maintenance drug, not a sedative.”

“I don’t use it as a sedative,” Haggerty protested. “If anything, just the opposite. It clears my mind, helps me focus, stay keen. It takes the edge off.”

“Listen to yourself,” Doug said as he adjusted dials with perhaps a shade more vigor than required. “If something is taking the edge off, by definition it’s making you less keen, not more so. You think you’re focusing and clearing your mind, but what you’re really doing is pacifying yourself. Your mind doesn’t clear, it becomes dull, latching on to the first solution that presents itself and clinging to it, whether it’s the best solution or not.”

“It helps me get the job done,” Haggerty persisted.

“Really? Look, Jason, the fact is we’re not designed to live forever. The things we do to ourselves, to extend our lives beyond what our healthiest ancestors could ever have dreamed of, aren’t natural. Our bodies know that, try as we might to fool them.”

“You’ve lost me,” Haggerty said.

“I may have lost myself,” Doug said ruefully. “What I’m getting at is, your reaction to celtrex, the way you’re abusing it — ” He held up a hand to stop Haggerty’s protest. “I think your body may be resisting the artificial attempt to make it live longer. Your need for celtrex may be tied to an instinct to die, to make room for the next generation, continue the life of the species rather than the life of the individual.”

Haggerty had never heard this particular theory before.

“You think celtrex is making me suicidal?”

“I think maybe it’s exacerbating something in the telemor treatments that your body is rebelling against.”

“Is that possible?” Haggerty asked.

“Oh, Jason, my friend,” Doug smirked. “The more science learns about the body and the brain, the more we realize we don’t know.”

Doug grunted satisfaction as the last setup program flashed ready. He threw a switch. An inkblot engulfed the room.

“Tell me what you see in this image.”

Haggerty got up and walked around the black, flowing globules.

“This part looks like an old steamship,” he observed. “Those globs look like buoys. The centerpiece seems like a giant spider, spinning . . .”

Haggerty knew each word was being recorded, analyzed by patterns of semantics and symbol, each syllable and pause and inflection compared to the dozen other times he’d taken this test. There was no way to cheat. The machine would detect that he was stressed. It might even factor in the significance this date held for him. The results would get sent upstairs; he’d never see them.

Apparently, some results didn’t take long to analyze. Haggerty watched with interest as Doug consulted his screen and sat back.

“Anything interesting?”

“Nothing I hadn’t already figured out,” Doug said. “But I had hoped . . .”

“What’s the bad news, Doc?” Not that it mattered. Haggerty wondered if Doug knew. Maybe that was why he’d invited Haggerty to dinner this evening with himself and Mandy, remembering the anniversary, figuring he’d help Haggerty get through the day. But Haggerty had declined the invitation, and Doug was enough of a friend to understand that some things couldn’t be helped — and enough of a friend to dislike his own helplessness.

“You know what the bad news is,” Doug said quietly. “I could see it in your eyes when you turned me down for dinner. You used to beg me to invite you over for Mandy’s famous cream cheese cakes.”

“Doug. . . .”

“That isn’t all,” he went on brusquely. “The other bit of bad news the analysis has come up with . . .” He looked at the reading again, and Haggerty was surprised to see a smile break out on his face. “Well, maybe it isn’t bad news, although I’m sure you’ll consider it a disaster.”

“What is it?” Haggerty said sourly.

“Your response arc to the celtrex is baseline lethargic.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“It means that your body is no longer responding to the higher dosage. You’d get the same therapeutic effect, as far as telemor maintenance properties go, from a smaller dose.”

Haggerty frowned. It didn’t matter a damn. But the surest way to rouse Doug’s suspicions and subject himself to a well-meaning, futile attempt at intervention was to let this go without protest.

“That can’t be right, Doug,” he said, making the argument he would have made had he not intended to press. “I feel the difference with the higher dose. I don’t know why the analysis says it isn’t working. I guarantee that it is.”

“Jason, old boy, you are in no condition to guarantee a damned thing. Not according to these readings. Trust me on this.” Doug was clearly enjoying himself. “The higher dose isn’t helping. It might even be making things worse. I’m decreasing your dosage of celtrex.”

Haggerty shook his head. When he recorded his press tonight, he’d have to remember to include an apology to Doug. “Trying to counter my instinct to die?” he said, knowing that in his case, the instinct was too deeply ingrained to be negated.

Doug didn’t know that, though. He flashed Haggerty a wicked grin.

“God, I hope so.”

* * *

Excerpt from The Killswitch Review, published by Yard Dog Press. Copyright 2011 Steven-Elliot Altman.

Steven-Elliot Altman is a bestselling author, screenwriter, and videogame developer. He won multiple awards for his online role playing game, 9Dragons. His novels include Captain America is Dead, Zen in the Art of Slaying Vampires, Batman: Fear Itself, Batman: Infinite Mirror, The Killswitch Review, The Irregulars, and Deprivers. His writing has been compared to that of Stephen King, Dean Koontz, Michael Crichton and Philip K. Dick, and he has collaborated with world class writers such as Neil Gaiman, Michael Reaves, Harry Turtledove and Dr. Janet Asimov. He’s also the editor of the critically acclaimed anthology The Touch, and a contributor to Shadows Over Baker Street, a Hugo Award winning anthology of Sherlock Holmes meets H.P. Lovecraft stories.

Steven also bares ink on his body, and is bi, as in bi-coastal, between NYC and LA. He’s currently hard at work writing and directing his latest videogame Cursed Love, an online free to play gothic horror RPG from Dark Hermit Studios, set in Victorian London. Think Sherlock Holmes, Jack The Ripper and Dorian Gray mercilessly exploit the cast of Twilight. Friend Cursed Love (Official Closed Beta) on facebook and you can have fun playing out this tawdry, tragic romance with Steven while the game is being beta tested!

Diane DeKelb-Rittehouse spent several years in Manhattan as an actress before marrying her college sweetheart and returning to the Philadelphia area where she had been born. Diane first worked with Steven-Elliot Altman when they created the acclaimed, Publisher’s Weekly Starred-Review anthology The Touch: Epidemic of the Millennium, in which her story “Gifted” appeared. Diane has published a number of critically acclaimed short stories, most notably in the science fiction, murder, and horror genres. Her young adult fantasy novel, Fareie Rings: The Book of Forests, is now available in stores or online.

Interested in buying a printed copy of The Killswitch Review? Well, Steve’s publisher Yard Dog Press was kind enough to put up a special page where SuicideGirls can get a special discount and watch a sexy trailer. Just follow this link to KillswitchReview.com and click on the SG logo.

* * *Related Posts:
Fiction Friday: The Killswitch Review – Chapter One
Fiction Friday: The Killswitch Review – Chapter One, Part Two
Fiction Friday: The Killswitch Review – Chapter One, Part Three

I really can`t judge whether a general longing for a thread like this exists, but in order to keep the Candids Thread candid, it might be appropriate. For example: Fatality (image) Persephone (image) Vivid (image) And yes, myself as well, because I gasp in please at what Elena produces: (image) more

I really can`t judge whether a general longing for a thread like this exists, but in order to keep the Candids Thread candid, it might be appropriate.

For example:

Fatality



Persephone



Vivid



And yes, myself as well, because I gasp in please at what Elena produces:

Erin Morgenstern’s first book, The Night Circus, will be released on September 13th. She already has a movie deal in the works. Summit Entertainment bought the film rights to develop a motion picture based on the upcoming publication. Morgenstern joined Summit’s literary based presentations at Comic-Con... more

Erin Morgenstern’s first book, The Night Circus, will be released on September 13th. She already has a movie deal in the works. Summit Entertainment bought the film rights to develop a motion picture based on the upcoming publication. Morgenstern joined Summit’s literary based presentations at Comic-Con this summer, including the Breaking Dawn movies and two other authors of source material Summit is adapting, Divergent's Veronica Roth and Warm Bodies' Issac Marion.

The Night Circus is set in a fantastical circus that magically appears at night. Two magicians battle as they’ve been trained to since childhood, but as they compete they fall in love. Now can’t you imagine some Hollywood megastars brooding it up as those emotionally tormented sorcerers, in lavish Circus costumes too?

Morgenstern herself exhibits a unique style fitting for a chronicler of the performing arts. She likes corsets, and the red stripes of the one she wore in San Diego was the only color in her all black ensemble. If you look up her website, you’ll see influences from Stephen King to J.K. Rowling. You’ll also find out she has also painted her own deck of Tarot cards. We sat down with the emerging literary star and soon to be movie star in San Diego.

SG: Is getting a movie deal the dream for an author?

Erin Morgenstern: I had never thought about it and to have it happen before the book even comes out, I certainly never even fathomed. I didn’t even think that it got to the movie deal stage before the book was out. So it is definitely amazing and a little bit unbelievable too.

SG: And for your first book too.

EM: Yeah, trying to just get into the publishing industry and starting out as a first time author, anything anyone ever told me never happens to debut authors is happening to me so.

SG: Do you see it as a movie when you’re writing it?

EM: I see everything very visually. I’m not sure it would be a proper movie but I definitely see everything in my head. I have a visual imagination. Sometimes I’m just transcribing the things I see in my head. I do everything, like the directing and the lighting design. I know what it looks like in my head so I’ll be curious to see what it actually looks like once it’s on proper film.

SG: Is that what you do when you read other books too?

EM: I do. I have trouble reading books that I can’t visualize. Normally the books that I love are the ones that I can completely immerse myself in in my head.

SG: Why does the circus get a bad rap?

EM: I don’t know, it really does. I think it probably has so many associations like animal abuse and no one likes clowns, that sort of thing. But I think there are a lot of aspects I love. I love Cirque du Soleil and that sort of a little bit elevated circus rather than a classic Barnum and Bailey sort of idea.
SG: Is there something about portraying it as a fantasy that elevates it for you?

EM: I think it’s some sort of magical experience to be had. Either a circus or a theater production, something that you go and have an experience I think is a different sort of entertainment than sitting and watching something. It’s one of the reasons in my circus you wander around. You don’t just sit in a seat and watch a show. I like that sort of active entertainment idea. I think the trappings of a circus lent itself well to having multiple tents and you walk around and choose what you see.

SG: Do you imagine there are all sorts of other stories going on at the same time as the characters we’re following?

EM: Oh, definitely. I think the circus is full of stories and everyone who goes to the circus has a story, everyone who’s in the circus has his own story. I think that idea of everyone having overlapping stories is where the book came from because each character in the story, you focus on certain characters, each character has their own story. It’s not one person’s story with a lot of extraneous people just hanging along.

SG: Does putting 19th century fashions and corsets into a book help bring it back?

EM: I don’t know. I like the whole steampunk aesthetic but I’m not punk enough to be steampunk I think. It has a very interesting flavor to me, that whole era, the fashion and the feel of it. I think there’s probably a reason why the steampunk stuff is very, very popular right now. I think it’s appealing as a visual and fashion statement for a lot of people.
SG: A lot of people shop vintage and join groups that dress from older eras, but do you feel there’s a movement coming to bring old fashion back to the mainstream?

EM: I think there might be that reaction to everything being so modern and technical, that kind of nostalgic retro sort of feel. I’ve noticed it in music a lot, a lot of new bands that sound like old bands which I think is kind of great that we’re living in a time where everything old is new again.

SG: I’m not particularly into corsets but I think women look great in those old fashions. I don’t know about men in knickers though.

EM: Oh, I like the ascots and hats. Hats should come back.

SG: I saw on your website you were a big Stephen King reader.

EM: Yes, when I was very young.

SG: I was too. What inspiration did you get from Stephen King’s work?

EM: There’s darkness and there’s a lot of darkness, but he balances it well with light too. I was reading at a very, very young age. I started reading Stephen King when I was 11 or 12 because there was no YA section back when I was reading. I think his stories are also very epic. That whole Stephen King world feels like it’s real even when fantastical things happen in it. That’s one of the things I try to do with my own writing. It’s magical but it seems like it’s grounded in reality.
SG: He doesn’t overwrite either. He gets to the point. If it's 1000 pages, it's 1000 pages of story.

EM: I do too. I can’t write a 1000 page at this point. Maybe someday but there’s something about his writing. I love his book On Writing. It’s one of my favorite writing instruction books and one of the things that I always go back to, he talks very early on about how writing is telepathy. You’re expressing a thought in your head and transmitting it through words to someone else’s head and that’s the thing I go back to all the time when I’m writing, about transmitting this idea from my head to someone else’s.

SG: What are your favorite King books?

EM: Oh, It was probably the one. That’s probably why there are no clowns in my circus, because I read It too many times. That and The Stand is my all time favorite. I haven’t read that many of his recent ones. Now that I have an e-reader I’m tempted to do Under the Dome.

SG: Right, we won’t have to carry around the heavy book.

EM: That’s my major bone, those heavy, heavy that I have to lug around.

SG: When you read J.K. Rowling, was that just as a fan?

EM: The first Harry Potter I read when I took a children’s literature class in college. I read it for class which is a really interesting introduction to it because you’re reading all sorts of different children’s books and you could tell that it was something different. It had that sort of specialness. Immediately, I was in school, I had plenty of other things to do but I went out and got the other two published books at that point and read them, even though I didn’t have to for class. I think the world she creates is so intoxicating, all the details of the food. It’s a fun world to escape into.
SG: What is the deal with your Tarot cards?

EM: At the same time I was writing the book, I was painting a black and white Tarot deck. It’s 78 cards. It took a very long time but I’m kind of fascinated by Tarot and Tarot reading. I’m not a very good Tarot reader but I love the symbolism and the iconography of it. There are some really beautiful Tarot decks out there. It’s fun to see variations on themes so I wanted to try and do my own take on these very traditional sort of images.

SG: Did you create different symbols?

EM: I kind of put my own spins and flavors on it. There’s a little bit of an Alice in Wonderland feel. My Fool card is Alice chasing the rabbit down the rabbit hole. There are some references to my own book in there. The Hangman card I the Hangman from the acrobat tent.

SG: What’s the Death card?

EM: My Death card is a woman in a Victorian coat with her face hidden by an open umbrella. That’s actually a little bit of a reference to Neil Gaiman’s Death from the Sandman series.

SG: Can you read your own?

EM: I can’t read my own because I see what I changed about them. I can see the ones that I changed my mind about what I wanted to do or I took forever to adjust to where things were in the cards. I see the whole history of the painting so it’s harder for me to read it just as a symbolic card. Other people tell me that they read very well though.
SG: How do you learn to draw and make images? Do you just see it and make it?

EM: I learned, in visual art especially, I took a class when I was very young, like seven, eight, nine, somewhere in there, based on a book called Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain. You learn to draw just what you’re seeing in shapes and angles and not trying to draw the object. I think that’s very interesting and it works for a lot of people. If I tried to draw a portrait and I was trying to make it look like the subject, I wouldn’t be able to do it. But if I just draw the pieces of it, it’s easier to connect and that influences all of my art. I don’t try to make it look like something.

SG: You’ve said you’re not a planner or outliner. Doesn’t sound very structured, but what kept you working and doing it?

EM: I could write and write and write and I might not necessarily have a book at the end of the day. That was one of the things I learned. What works for me is just writing and exploring a setting or a character and just writing a lot. Then I have to go back and give it a structure and that’s one of the things I learned through the whole publishing process, because the version of the book that I even started querying literary agents with, was a mess. It was sprawling and it had no plot and one of the things I learned from working with my agent is how to structure what I had. I think I’m getting better at it but you could definitely write forever and write thousands and thousands of pages but you need a structure for it to have it be successful as a book.
SG: It doesn’t sound like you were tweaking and tweaking the same pages, procrastinating.

EM: No, I was doing hardcore heavy construction. Every draft, I don’t even know how many drafts it went through, because I had stages that could not be called proper drafts because they are just like being ripped to pieces. But I think it helps to tear apart what I had and reconstruct it. I kind of excavate when I write and I find different things just from writing. Sometimes I find things that work better than what I had so then I end up replacing things and that sort of thing.

SG: Funny about query letters. As a journalist, I’ve never had success writing query letters.

EM: I had a lot of success with my original query letter. I think my query letter was probably better than the book at that point because I think the concept that I had was enticing and the circus itself was enticing, but it didn’t have a story and it didn’t have a plot. I was lucky enough to find an agent who saw the potential in what I had as a world and that it needed to have more of a plot.

SG: I could never get behind the fancy salacious preamble letters.

EM: I didn’t do that either. I kind of just did the flavor. I didn’t give a whole lot away, just the nocturnal circus and magical goings on beneath the surface is probably enough to be enticing.

There have been many video games based on Games Workshop’s venerable Warhammer universe, but thus far none save Canadian developer Relic Entertainment and their Dawn of War PC strategy franchise seem able to do it right. Now, with the forthcoming multiplatform third-person action game Warhammer 40,000:... more

There have been many video games based on Games Workshop’s venerable Warhammer universe, but thus far none save Canadian developer Relic Entertainment and their Dawn of War PC strategy franchise seem able to do it right. Now, with the forthcoming multiplatform third-person action game Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine, Relic are trying to make lightning strike twice with a completely different platform and style of game. Space Marine looks like a mix of Darksiders and Gears of War, with the player taking on the role of one of the titular walking tanks so heavily armored that he doesn’t need any wimpy cover system. SuicideGirls spoke with Space Marine’s producer Andy Lang about the Warhammer 40,000 [AKA “40K”] universe, Nobs, and what life is like during crunch time for a game developer.

Keith Daniels: So what’s life actually like for a developer on a game this size in the month before it comes out?

Andy Lang[b/]: Oh my god, dude. [Laughs] As the deadline comes to an end it’s your time you have to pour in to try to hit that deadline. If you’re passionate about anything like this that’s really creative, you start just pouring in the hours. The last three or four months you’re looking at fifteen or sixteen hour days, six days a week. But it’s worth it when you’re making a game like this. Everybody’s really into it and it’s really exciting. So you throw away your life, basically, for three months, but you end up with this great product on the other end.

KD: Do you feel like you’ve been in a time machine and your family has to fill you in on everything that happened in those months besides the game?

AL: [Laughs] Exactly. That’s exactly how it feels. You hang up your life for three months and then you come back out of it and go, “What happened?”

KD: This is the first shooter that Relic has done in years, since The Outfit, and the first console game that you guys have done in a while. What has changed in the intervening years and how is it different from doing an RTS?

AL: I was on The Outfit and many of the RTS games. It’s like anything. Once you get into developing it you start learning all those small little details that make the games different. One thing we did differently from The Outfit is we actually hired a team that had experience building these kinds of games. Then you combine that with Relic’s passion and pedigree and knowledge on how to file and polish with a really strong team where we blend in our pals from the RTS team with the console people. So, really, it was about getting the right people to bring that knowledge to Relic and show us how to build one of these games.

KD: Does Space Marine use a third-party engine or is it something you’ve developed in-house?

AL: We used our own proprietary technology, but it’s within the THQ family. We took an early drop of the Darksiders engine and we’ve [been] adding and modifying our technology [to that], like our own animation system, our own effects system, and built upon their really solid base for a third-person action game. We just built on top of that.

KD: For people who don’t know or don’t care about the Warhammer universe, what sets this game apart from other third-person shooters?

AL: One of the big differences is the core combat model. If you’re a big fan of gunplay or swordplay, there’s an advantage to mixing the two of them together. One of the sweetest things to do is... if I see a group of Orks, instead of hiding behind some cover and taking potshots at them... In typical [third-person shooter] games you die quite quickly if you’re getting shot. In our game you’re heavily armored and we play up on that. We encourage the player to charge into battle. You can use an ability called Bull Rush that launches the Orks back. Then, as you’re pushing them back, you pop your gun and start killing a bunch of Orks, then seamlessly bounce back to your swordplay and clear out the group. A typical encounter will involve about ten to fifteen Orks when you’re running into it, so it has a very different feel than your typical shooter or action game. We really tried to blend the two [genres] of them, and it’s actually worked out really well.

KD: As fun as it to mow down dozens of mobs, are there also plenty of heavier enemies that will present more of a challenge?

AL: Yep. Just within the Ork race there’s a mixture of your basic grunt. Orks are kind of a funny race: the bigger they get the higher ranking they get, so you end up fighting these...

KD: Nobs.

AL: Nobs. You know your 40K. [Laughs] These guys present more of a challenge. If you just sit there and shoot them they’ll close the [inaudible] on you and kill you. So you have to use your other moves like Evade and really engage them with aggressive melee and try and stun them so you can take them out with a finishing move. There are about... oh... fifteen different [types of] Orks with different puzzles to them that our game designers mix-and-match to create challenges for the players to solve.

KD: We’ve also seen Chaos in some of the trailers. Is the game fairly evenly split between the two factions?

AL: About a 60-40 split. The first half of the game is heavily focused on the Orks, then we kind of have both together for a while, then the endgame is more about Chaos.

KD: Why focus on the Ultramarines instead of some of the more exotic chapters?

AL: Spoken like a true fan. [Laughs] Look, the Ultramarines are just the iconic Space Marines, and we thought if we were going to launch the first ever third-person game ever done in this IP we wanted to start with the most iconic race. So that was the Ultramarines.

KD: Is what happened with Fire Warrior in the back of anyone’s mind as far as, “Well this is what happened the last time we made a game that wasn’t about Space Marines.”?

AL: “Let’s have them play the Space Marines next time.” [Laughs]

KD: Is it fun to make a game that’s more true to the 40K fluff regarding the Space Marines, as opposed to the ones in Dawn of War that can be killed by half a dozen Orks?

AL: Yeah. It’s really been fun. I’ve been around since the first Dawn of War game. It’s really been cool, instead of exploring the tabletop side of the game which is what the Dawn of War series is about, to really dig into the fluff and the fantasy you always read about in the books: how it’s one Space Marine against a thousand Orks. It’s been really fun to explore that and develop a brand new take on the 40K fiction to create an action game like this.

KD: Have you read a lot of the Black Library books, Dan Abnett and all that?

AL: I’ve tried reading a lot of them, but the only one I’ve really gotten through and enjoyed a lot was the Eisenhorn series. What’s really cool about that book is that you really got a feel for the Chaos Marines and the Space Marines from a human perspective. That’s quite interesting. I had our narrative writers read that book just to gain that perspective on the Space Marines.

KD: Yeah, because if you look at them casually it seems like they don’t anything apart from kill and sleep.

AL: Yeah. That’s been a challenge to work in the more human side of the Space Marines. If you read the Codexes they’re very rigid, while the books tend to loosen them up a bit and really try to weave in a human side to the story so it’s not just these killing machines. Which they are, but they’re also people with different personalities who do different things. That’s a little more interesting.

KD: The Imperium in 40K are hardly what you’d call the “good guys”. Are there any hints of their brutality in this game?

AL: Mmm, no. We kind of stay away from that. The one thing that’s interesting is that when you’re walking around on the Forge World -- the giant planet-size factory kind of like Detroit smeared across an entire world’s surface -- you hear the voice on Graia, which is the world, talking, and it’s like, ‘It doesn’t matter that there’s this huge war going on, please continue going to work, please keep building machines for the war gods. It is your duty.’ That’s probably the closest we hint at it. It actually adds a real human perspective to it, because you’re like, “Oh my god. These people have to go to work in the middle of a war? That makes no sense.” ‘Zero attendance today in X factory.’ It makes for a nice flavor, but that’s as close as we touch it.

KD: The life of the average person in that universe is complete shit. [Laughs]

AL: [Laughs] It’s totally depressing.

KD: Will there be anything like the Last Stand mode from Dawn of War in Space Marine?

AL: No, we have the multiplayer and then our main campaign.

KD: What about dedicated servers on the PC?

AL: No, we use a peer-to-peer system for our multiplayer.

KD: You’ve announced that the ability to play co-op through the campaign will be released as DLC about a month after launch. Is that going to be free for everybody? There’s a lot of confusion about that on the forums.

[Publicity assistant speaks up]: We can’t talk about those things right now. We can’t talk about co-op. But we will be providing answers to those things very soon and very clear information about what those features are and the structure of how you get them and all those things. But right now we can’t talk about them in any more depth, unfortunately.

KD: Given Relic’s longstanding relationship with Games Workshop, are you guys ever privy to forthcoming changes to the tabletop game, and ideas that they have?

AL: I can’t really talk about that. [Laughs]

KD: [Laughs] I dont mean specific changes. What I mean is: does that happen?

AL: The only thing that happens for us is that a new unit might be coming out during production, and we’ll update the unit for our game, and by the time we release [our game] the plastic and pewter models are hitting the store shelves. That’s the only time we’re really privy to information.

KD: What’s your personal favorite army on the tabletop?

AL: [Groans] I used to be a Chaos man. I had a Chaos army being built, and then when we started building Dawn of War it switched over to building a Blood Ravens army. I like my Space Marines and my Chaos Marines.

KD: Was Warhammer something you grew up with or something you were introduced to later?

AL: I couldn’t really afford it as a kid, so it was something that was really only introduced to me when I came to Relic and there were a whole bunch of people who were passionate about it. Before even Dawn of War there were people who used to play quite a bit here.

KD: Last question, and it has nothing to do with Space Marine: is there ever going to be a Homeworld 3?

AL: [Laughs] I can’t talk about that.

Space Marine will be released on September 6th for Xbox 360, PS3, and PC.

by Damon Martin (video) [Above: Anthrax – “Fight 'Em 'Til You Can't” from Worship Music] On September 13, Anthrax will return with a new studio album Worship Music, the band's first release of new material in 8 years. While it may seem like the band has been away for a few years,... more

by Damon Martin



[Above: Anthrax – “Fight 'Em 'Til You Can't” from Worship Music]

On September 13, Anthrax will return with a new studio album Worship Music, the band's first release of new material in 8 years. While it may seem like the band has been away for a few years, that couldn't be further from the truth.

Constant touring as well as some mega shows where Anthrax co-headlined along with Metallica, Megadeth and Slayer, means the band has been busy and have never stopped playing music. The new album however welcomes back original vocalist Joey Belladonna, who makes his first appearance on an Anthrax studio album since the 1990 album Persistence of Time.

I caught up with the man most responsible for Anthrax over all these years, Scott Ian, for a phone to preview the new record and to talk about everything that led into its creation.


[Above L-R, back row: Frank Bello, Scott Ian, Joey Belladonna, front row: Rob Caggiano, Charlie Benante. Photo: Matthew Rodgers.]

Damon Martin: Let's start with at the beginning; what a lot of people will be talking about with this new record is that Joey Belladonna is back on vocals. How did that all come about and what's it been like having him back full time?

Scott Ian: I guess it goes back to whenever we found out about The Big 4 shows. When we first started hearing rumors of that happening, I think that was kind of the moment to get Joey back in the band. Because we felt like he was the guy that should represent this band on those shows cause he was the guy back then, and these Big 4 shows certainly were going to be a celebration of all that. It just seemed to make sense and that's what pretty much got the ball rolling…It was literally like 'we want to do this, we want to move forward, we want to make a record with you, let's do it.' That's pretty much what happened.

DM: It's been 8 years since Anthrax had an album release....at this stage of the game for you guys, is it about making sure you're putting together the best possible music so you just do it when the time is right, or had you planned to take a hiatus between records?

SI: It wasn't time off at all. I think that's a misconception People can see where I've been for the last 8 years. We put out a record in 2004, We've Come For You All, we toured that for a year and a half. We jumped right into the reunion tour with Joey and Danny, and that ended at the end of 2006, and the beginning of 2007 is when we actually started writing Worship Music –– so there really was no time off. I don't understand why people think we've just been gone for 8 years.

DM: So you started writing the new music in 2007, what's the construction process been for building this new album?

SI: When it first started it was just Charlie and I actually together, there really wasn't a band at that point. Not that we had broken up, but we had finished the reunion tour in like October ‘06 and we took a break for the rest of the year. We hadn't stopped in 5 years, so we took like 2 months off and then I went to Chicago to meet with Charlie in 2007 with songs with really no plan. We didn't have a record deal staked, we didn't really know anything. We just knew we had some ideas and let's see how this starts to turn out.

We wrote this record from that point and even once the band was back together and even through having Dan Nelson in as the singer for 5 minutes, and him being gone and now Joey being back, the record was written pretty much the same way every Anthrax record in our history was written.

One major difference recording this record was once Joey was back in we basically gave Joey the keys to the kingdom and said, “Look dude, we want you on this record, we want your voice, we want your choices, we want your ideas.” He did all the vocals, just him and the producer Jay Ruston. The two of them in the studio without us hanging over their shoulders telling him what to do, and I think you really hear it in Joey's performance.

DM: In so much past Anthrax work you guys have had themes and references to other stories. Like “Among the Living” with Stephen King's The Stand and “Misery Loves Company” from King's Misery. Is there something that influenced the new album?

SI: I'm sure there's stuff like that all over the record. I mean off the top of my head the song “Fight Until You Can't” the actual title is a nod to Battlestar Gallactica, although the song has nothing to do with Battlestar Gallactica, but there's where the title came from. The song's about zombies, or killing zombies. Anything I'm reading or seeing or doing is going to show up lyrically somehow. Anything I'm that currently obsessed with is going to show up somehow on the record.

DM: The first single “Fight Em' Till You Can't” has an unmistakable zombie theme around it. What zombie movies, comics or whatever have you read or watched over the years that we could see in this song?

SI: I'm a huge fan of the comic The Walking Dead, that's probably my favorite. I love the TV show as well. Obviously a big fan of both Dawn of the Dead movies, the original and the remake, I think those were done great. I'm just a fan of the genre. I'll see the worst, just shittiest B and C level zombie movies, just because I might find 30 seconds of it entertaining. I love Zombie Survival Guide and World War Z from Max Brooks, I think those books are awesome. I'm just a really big fan of the genre.

DM: Anthrax is one of very few bands that have remained relevant and still popular in so many different eras of music. You guys are now celebrating your 30th anniversary as a band, what do you believe has been the biggest factor in fans still following you from your first record to new fans following you today?

SI: Other than the obvious of because we rule, I just think there's an honesty and there's a responsibility to our audience, and there's a loyalty that goes back and forth between us and the people. Not just Anthrax fans, but I just think metal fans in general. I think that's what's been able to maintain us for 30 years now. I think people really know, they have an expectation with us and we not only fill those expectations most of the time, but we end up exceeding the expectations.

Like when you go to the store and you buy this thing you like to eat, when you open that package it's going to taste the way you expect it to taste. You'd be really upset if you opened that package one day and it tasted like shit. That's pretty much where the responsibility comes in. We love what we do, we love playing this kind of music, we're fans of this kind of music and I think we as Anthrax have a responsibility to metal in general.

DM: Anthrax has always been a band that's had a certain chemistry with their fans, and from the early days till now where you really seem to relate with them through the internet, you've grown that relationship over the years. Can you talk to us about that?

SI: It's always been of the utmost importance to have that relationship. One of the good things about the internet, and how a band can use the internet, is to even make that relationship closer by really getting rid of the middle man. Obviously, there's a lot of problems with the internet and music, but being able to interact directly with your fans, for me, has been an amazing thing over the last 10 years. I'm on Twitter all the time, I'm on there answering people's questions all the time.

When I was a kid growing up and being a fan of the bands I was a fan of, there was no way in a million years you could like somehow send a question to Gene Simmons and you were going to get an answer to it immediately. Someone can ask me a question on Twitter and I can respond to that, that must feel amazing as a fan of somebody to go, “Wow, that guy just took the time out of his day to answer my question” and I think that's super important to stay on top of that. To ignore that tool would be a disservice to your fans.

For more information on Anthrax and Worship Music visit Anthrax.com, and follow @Anthrax and @Scott_Ian on Twitter.

Related Posts:
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by Blogbot (image) (image) (image) (image) (image) Lola the Pug


 (pictured with her mistress Lunar Suicide in "Pugs Not Drugs") INTO: Chicken (mainly), being bossy, and hats. NOT INTO: Having an empty bowl, and the hair-dryer. MAKES ME HAPPY: A full tummy and visiting my granny. MAKES... more

by Blogbot











Lola the Pug


 (pictured with her mistress Lunar Suicide in "Pugs Not Drugs")

• INTO: Chicken (mainly), being bossy, and hats.


• NOT INTO: Having an empty bowl, and the hair-dryer.


• MAKES ME HAPPY: A full tummy and visiting my granny.


• MAKES ME SAD: When Mommy moves the furniture around and doesn't tell me –– I can't see!


• HOBBIES: Watching the TV and helping cook dinner –– I’m the food taster.


• 5 THINGS I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT: Mommy's bed, the fridge, my extra large harness, my floral jersey, chicken.


• VICES: Food –– I have a licking problem.


• I SPEND MOST OF MY FREE TIME: Sleeping on the bed and barking at the fridge.

Get to know Lola
's mistress, Lunar Suicide, over at SuicideGirls.com!

(image) by Bob Suicide Being the old man that I am, I remember gaming back when we used simple controllers with a limited amount of buttons, sat on our butts for days on end –– without a single save point in sight –– and I liked it. When DDR came out, I was suspicious of this "new" interactive... more

by Bob Suicide

Being the old man that I am, I remember gaming back when we used simple controllers with a limited amount of buttons, sat on our butts for days on end –– without a single save point in sight –– and I liked it. When DDR came out, I was suspicious of this "new" interactive format, and wholeheartedly believed it was part of some giant government conspiracy to get me off my couch. Not being particularly "rhythmically coordinated," the government's devious plot failed.

However, little did I know that this set a dangerous precedent, and that something far greater was looming on the horizon of interactive gaming: the Wii. I was actually working at GameStop when the Wii came out. Those were dangerous times on the front lines of the war of retailers vs. consumers. Many a man was lost, either trampled by the hordes of moms trying to bag "the ultimate Christmas gift" or nagged to death with the sonic onslaught of "is it in yet?"

But, after the dust settled and we finished mourning the loss of our beloved brethren, the Wii didn't really live up to the hype. Ok, I know that's not an entirely accurate statement to make considering the sales of the Wii and the ground it has made in expanding the casual gaming market. But, as a hardcore gamer, has the Wii ever really provided a satisfying gaming experience? Not really. Sure, Zelda was fun and the console lends itself well to rails shooters like Resident Evil. However, I have two Wiis and I can say with certainty that mine have been used as doorstops more than they have served as relevant gaming consoles.

Needless to say, when the PS3 Move was released it seemed like Sony had missed the marketing mark yet again, since their sad "EyeToy with a wand" failed to capture the hearts and minds of the consumer the way the Wii did. And I joyously snarked –– as any fanboy does –– at their lame attempts to regain relevancy.

So when the Kinect made its debut I sneered at the projections people were making. And I wasn't alone. Even Penny Arcade gods Mike Krahulik and Jerry Holkins scoffed at the idea of a motion-sensitive gaming experience that could galvanize the hardcore market.



Even upon playing with Kinect at E3 I was not converted. There was no amount of cute animals that I could pet that would keep me from insulting what I saw as a "glorified peripheral" that was sure to fade from gaming relevance as soon as it was released.

Surprisingly robust sales proved us curmudgeons wrong, but it still didn't make us like the motion-sensitive gaming genre. However the potential for the Kinect outside the gaming world was interesting. Wii and Kinect were fun at parties, and great for making fools of casual gamers, but the ability to pet ponies all day long never circumvented the desire to capture the flag or fragg 12-year olds online. It would take a powerful, adult title to replace those joys.

House of the Dead: Overkill almost did it for me. The Grindhouse-esque addition to the franchise that I knew and loved was a welcomed adult addition to the over-abundance of candy-coated titles available for the Wii. But at its core, the rails shooter wasn't enough of a "heavy hitter" to win me over. And, after I beat it, I quickly lost interest in my Wii once again...never to return.

However, Sega and the pre-Overkill team behind House of the Dead seems to be hitting the nail on the head with the upcoming survival horror game, Rise of Nightmares. I was able to preview the game myself at a recent screening event and I was surprised that I went home excited by my gaming experience. The gameplay is contextual and immersive. Taken off the rails, the player is able to freely navigate and interact with the environment, and the environment is filled with a host of horrific denizens. Rise of Nightmares is the first "adult" game for the Kinect, and while people often scoff at the over-abundance of blood, undead, and implements of destruction, I for one love the clear tongue-in-cheek homage to the slasher/torture horror genre.

So how does all of this come together? Well, upon playing the Rise of Nightmares demo, my heart grew an unprecedented three sizes that day.

In the middle of my Kinect-piphany, I was reminded of the joy I had playing Heavy Rain. It's titles like these that I hope and pray will revolutionize the gaming experience. Titles that find the perfect blend of engrossment and interaction (placing the gamer both in and amid the game and reality) to create a new and exciting gaming experience. However there’s all too few of these. After experiencing titles like Rise of Nightmares and Heavy Rain, I can see where other developers can take the hardcore gaming experience –– and the true immersion that could be had –– and I get excited.

Three months post-Heavy Rain, playing through my next interactive fiction purchase, Alan Wake, I was disappointed that my contextual interaction with the environment did not have the same resonance that Heavy Rain did. I was ruined for life. When I pressed "x" to grind some coffee for example, I was disappointed, since I felt that winding my analog joystick in a "grinding" motion would have immensely added to my gaming experience. But, sadly, Heavy Rain failed to influence the gaming market the way I expected/wanted it to.

I therefore hope Rise of Nightmares gets the recognition it deserves, that my excitement for this title is shared by others, and as a result my predictions regarding the game’s rightful place and subsequent effect on the gaming world come true. But given my track record, I may be grudgingly petting more Kinect puppies in my future than zombies. And that's a damn shame.

***

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by SG's Team Agony feat. Friskey and Tita Let us answer life's questions - because great advice is even better when it comes from SuicideGirls. (image) [Friskey in Dragon Lady] Q: I wrecked my motorcycle almost 6 years ago, and it has left me paralyzed and in a wheelchair. I haven't had... more

by SG's Team Agony feat. Friskey and Tita

Let us answer life's questions - because great advice is even better when it comes from SuicideGirls.


[Friskey in Dragon Lady]

Q: I wrecked my motorcycle almost 6 years ago, and it has left me paralyzed and in a wheelchair. I haven't had a relationship since. I have always been a bit shy, but now I feel self-conscious about my "situation". I feel like people look at me as though I am helpless. And its hard to find a girl who would rather ask me for my phone number than ask me if they can hold open a door for me. Most people see a person in a chair and their first thought usually isn't "Oooh, I want some of that!" I'm pretty likable guy...once you get past the fact that I'm in a chair. How would you suggest that I go about getting women to want to date me? In all honesty, what would it take for you to date a person who was paralyzed?

A: What it would take for me to date a man in a wheelchair, is basically the same thing it would take for me to date any man – able-bodied or not. Sweetness, charm and a bit of flirtation.

Given your predicament you might have to do a bit more approaching then you used to, so be active in your quest. Working on your shyness and self confidence is the first step. Feeling good about yourself and confident about who you are is the best kind of sexiness there is.

Depending on the extent of your injuries, joining a sport could help. And there are lots of choices for wheelchair sports, like basketball and sailing to name a few. Enroll yourself in an art class or an acting class. These are all great ways to self explore, express and gain confidence. And they offer great social aspects as well!

Instead of focusing on dating, how about developing relationships on a deeper level first? Connecting with people online is a really great way to actually do that. This way your "situation" won't be such a distraction and when it comes time for you to meet in person, you’ll both will be long over it.

There's lots of online communities, including our own, where you can converse with people who share similar interests to you. Join the forums and groups. You will find like-minded folks who embrace differences.

SG’s mission is to redefine beauty, that includes you too. We also have a group specifically for people with disabilities. Other sites to check out are: DisabledDesires.com a dating site which connects disabled and able bodied people. Disaboom.com is another excellent site for information and resources. They have an amazing range of info that includes sports, dating and jobs.

I can't even imagine how hard life has been since the accident. But try to have fun with this new approach. Once you make a conscious effort to embrace change within yourself, you will start to notice a change in the way people treat you and the quality of the relationships you form.

Good luck!

Friskey
Xo

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[Tita in West Coast]

Q: I’ve been with this guy for two years. We are now in a long distance relationship, but I’m at the point where I don’t know if we are still together. I get a call or a text message every couple of weeks. He’s 4 hours away from me. I was supposed to go with him, but he wanted me to leave my job and my family. He now wants to move closer, but has to come here to get stuff I’m keeping for him. Do I hold on to him or go my own way and see what else is out there?

A: First things first. Do you wish you heard from him more? If so, it's perfectly acceptable for you to ask for what you want and deserve. At this point you don't seem to be getting either. Additionally, only hearing from your mate every couple of weeks, sometimes only in text form, is not enough to sustain a relationship. People in long distance relationships have to work twice as hard to nurture their bond, and keep the fire burning.

How often do you contact him? Do you feel able to text or call him as you wish? If you are trying to contact him and your attempts are going unheard, it is a good indication that things are winding down.

Remember those early days of the relationship when you couldn't wait to hear from each other? Remember when you would get butterflies just thinking of him? Remember when you wondered what the other person was doing and when you would get to see each other again? What happened to those days?

No one said long distance is easy. There is want, and need, and day to day things that you can't share with each other. You can't kiss or touch, and it literally hurts to miss someone like that. However, you can still be invested in each other’s lives.

This is 2011. This is the time of tablets and computers, FaceBook and FaceTime, smart phones and smarter users! My grandparents were separated by war for 5 years, but were still as in love and connected via letters and telegrams, as they were during their courtship. Long distance or long term, the spark should never go out. Not on your end and not on his.

If you can remedy the current state of your communication, there may be hope for you. If not, I wouldn't wait for him to move closer. If the draw towards each other is no longer enough to run home each night and race to the phone, it might already be too late.

Best wishes!

*Besos*

Tita

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