Pet Peeves

People who acted disgusted when they find out that I own rats. No matter how you feel about rats, it's just rude. Just smile and keep your mouth shut.

I like pet rats. They're clean and they do that cute little nose wiggle....

Let's see:

The words "like" and "you know" thrown into every sentence.

People who don't use their blinker lights when changing lanes (also loop into this, people who don't do the courtesy wave when you let them merge)

The use of non-words such as "funner"

people who don't use blinkers... or use them incorrectly.


I know I have a bunch more... but that one just came to mind... can't think of the others right now.

People who walk around with those phone thingies in their ears, so they'll start talking and I'll be like, What? Huh?

People who walk around with giant water bottles, like they're trekkiing through the Sahara or something, Then they sit behind you and take a swig, making an annoying sloshing water sound while the cheap plastic contracts and kind of pops, and there's a little gurgle noise too and then they have a stream of half-water/half-saliva dripping down their chin.

"Oh, hold on a sec, call waiting.................. ..... ............. ......... ..... ........... ...... ............ ......... ........ .......... ............ ........... ............. ........................................................... ........... .......... Oh, sorry, telemarketer."


You might as well say this, "Oh, wait, I don't know who it is on the other line, but I would rather talk to anyone but you. So now YOU wait for ME to come back, because I'm SURE that whoever is trying to call me right now while I am talking to you has a REAL emergency, and it's life-threatening, and can't wait another 2 minutes while I finish my conversation with you. Be right back."

SPITTERS.

Earlier this week I was waiting for a bus, and there were two guys to either side of me, both of whom kept spitting into the grass every few seconds.

I swear people didn't spit like this before the late '90s. I think it started to happen when hip-hop culture got really popular.

ALSO!

Upstairs neighbors who STOMP really heavily. We have this guy upstairs, and I swear he never sits down for more than ten minutes at a time. All I hear up there is stomp, stomp, stomp. Have a little consideration for your neighbors, buttface!

I used to get so irritated with my upstairs neighbor. I swear to god it sounded like she was moving furniture 24 hours a day. Now that I live upstairs I kind of feel bad about getting so pissed. As much as we try to be considerate of my neighbors I just know that we drive the girl downstairs crazy. You just can't help but make noise while living your life. I think that it's just one of the shitty things about living in apartments.

My main pet peeve here lately is people who don't understand what the left lane of a major highway is all about. It's for the faster drivers. I cannot describe to you how many people don't seem to get this here where I live. It's annoying to no end.

List of cell phone beefs:
1) How many times have a seen someone begin a conversation on their phone as they get into their car!!! I hope they drive off a fucking cliff (and not land on anything important)...
2) Hands-free calling... Unless you make business calls constantly throughout the day, YOU DO NOT NEED THIS DEVICE... It doesn't help when you're driving and it makes you look like a pretentious dickhole...
3) Call waiting... Just call me back if you really think it might be important... I am sure as fuck not waiting for you...
4) Compulsive message checking... You know who you are... Conversation breaks for a minute and as though by reflex, you reach for the phone and speed-dial voicemail... Sure, I'll just sit here and pretend I don't want to pierce both your eardrums with a sharpie...
5) Food service conversation... Though I no longer work in the food service industry (thank dog for manual labor), you are the only one not infuriated by your futile attempt at multitasking... Go sit on a splintered fence post...
6) Believe it or not, the people on the other end CAN hear you if you don't yell... Just because you are unaware of the outside world does not mean we are unaware of you...
7) Apparently the ignore function doesn't exist on some phones... Mugging to me while you talk to another friend IS NOT A FUCKING CONVERSATION!!! Hang up or do the polite thing and remind me of how worthless my presence truly is... I hope you get crabs...
8) Text messaging is a good communication meduim... I work much of the day and appreciate your attempt at discretion... However, "yo brthr, what r u doin 2 nite" is not a fucking sentence nor will it ever be... Until they start charging by the letter, LEARN TO FUCKING SPELL!!!

Cathartic in its simplicity, but if I go on, I fear it will have a more adverse effect...

When restaurants slip too much garlic into their food, turning you into an involuntary garlic pariah.

"Blah blah blah, you know what i'm saying? Blah blah blah, you know what i'm saying? Blah blah, you know what i'm saying, know what i'm saying?"

it so happens that i speak the same english you speak

so yes, as a matter of fact, i do know what you're saying

idiot

There is a guy at my work that talks exactly like that. So annoying.

I also have a fellow at my work who does this but I infact have no clue what hes saying he mumbles something terrible and in a low voice aswell, Not one person in my department can understand him.