How To Get Some: 101

Ask if she's a robot.

Then what?

That was all the Captain needed.

Walk in like a Viking on a quest. Grab girl out of clutches of peers, walk to bedroom, kick door shut.


Worked... ONCE.

Lies, all of it.

Tell her you're about to go serve in Afghanistan for a year. Just don't be lying.

that never worked for me

Show up naked. This works anywhere, anytime*.

*Note: Not recommended for winter use.

I think that would statistically work more for women than men.

Were you in uniform? Maybe you needed better friends.

yes, and i did/do need better friends

You're supposed to say you're serving in the armed forces, not in a Tim Hortons.

tell her she looks like your mom.

that always works.

Take her to a dollar movie theater.

Supersize it.


heh heh heh

Buy some of those penis enlarging supplements you see in internet ads and spam emails. They obviously all work or you wouldn't hear so much about them.

Ask her how many fingers will fit.

Power level her toon.

really?

Yeah....by anytime I meant not always....and then comes the lawsuits and indecency charges

"Dammit, Dad!"