Boards > Silliness > If you're going to wax my vagina, at least cuddle with me afterwards!

rerusynjeh

USA

April 2011

JUN 17, 2011 07:54 PM

Nea said:

Greaser said:
The quality of vagina waxing has gone downhill since WalMart came along and put all the mom & pop vagina waxers out of business.

I remember the wax I got from Walmart, it didn't work. Blasphemy.

Well it's not that Wal-Mart brand vagina waxings are high-quality, they're just so cheap. They come into town, set up shop right off the interstate with plenty of free parking, while Tom's Good Old Fashioned Vagina Waxing Emporium and Malt Shoppe on Main Street has metered parking, and Main Street is only a one-way street. Then Wal-Mart undersells them on both the vagina waxings and he frosty chocolate milkshakes. And if it's a 24-hour Super Wal-Mart? Forget about it. Where else you going to go for a $3.00 vagina waxing at 2:00 in the morning? Not to Tom's, that's for darn-tootin! That lazy bastard is at home, in bed.

No wonder so many people protest Walmart, now that they offer vagina waxing they pretty much run the world. Poor Tom's, maybe if he offered milkshakes too business would be booming.

Lesson learned- I should have gone to Tom's.

RudieCantFail

Baton Rouge, LA

January 2006

JUN 17, 2011 07:58 PM

Nea said:

RudieCantFail said:

Nea said:

Greaser said:
The quality of vagina waxing has gone downhill since WalMart came along and put all the mom & pop vagina waxers out of business.

I remember the wax I got from Walmart, it didn't work. Blasphemy.

Well it's not that Wal-Mart brand vagina waxings are high-quality, they're just so cheap. They come into town, set up shop right off the interstate with plenty of free parking, while Tom's Good Old Fashioned Vagina Waxing Emporium and Malt Shoppe on Main Street has metered parking, and Main Street is only a one-way street. Then Wal-Mart undersells them on both the vagina waxings and he frosty chocolate milkshakes. And if it's a 24-hour Super Wal-Mart? Forget about it. Where else you going to go for a $3.00 vagina waxing at 2:00 in the morning? Not to Tom's, that's for darn-tootin! That lazy bastard is at home, in bed.

No wonder so many people protest Walmart, now that they offer vagina waxing they pretty much run the world. Poor Tom's, maybe if he offered milkshakes too business would be booming.

Oh, Tom has milkshakes too (and they're damn good, old -fashioned, 50's style milkshakes), it's a vagina waxing emporium and malt shoppe. But Tom's only one man. He can only wax so many vaginas and make so many milkshakes in one day. His son didn't want to take up the family business (he went off to law school), and Mrs. Tom had to stop doing ball-waxings since her arthritis got worse, so they lost that side of the business. To boot, Tom insists on being home in time for Matlock, so they're only open until 6:00pm, and not at all on Sundays. I mean, what if a gal wants to get herself spruced up before heading over to church on a Sunday morning? It's really no way to run a business.

RudieCantFail

Baton Rouge, LA

January 2006

JUN 17, 2011 08:00 PM

rerusynjeh said:
Lesson learned- I should have gone to Tom's.

Bonus: The milkshakes can also be used to numb your bits if you find Tom's waxing technique to be less than gentle. No need for special panties!

Nea

New York, NY

October 2006

JUN 17, 2011 08:01 PM

RudieCantFail said:

Nea said:

RudieCantFail said:

Nea said:

Greaser said:
The quality of vagina waxing has gone downhill since WalMart came along and put all the mom & pop vagina waxers out of business.

I remember the wax I got from Walmart, it didn't work. Blasphemy.

Well it's not that Wal-Mart brand vagina waxings are high-quality, they're just so cheap. They come into town, set up shop right off the interstate with plenty of free parking, while Tom's Good Old Fashioned Vagina Waxing Emporium and Malt Shoppe on Main Street has metered parking, and Main Street is only a one-way street. Then Wal-Mart undersells them on both the vagina waxings and he frosty chocolate milkshakes. And if it's a 24-hour Super Wal-Mart? Forget about it. Where else you going to go for a $3.00 vagina waxing at 2:00 in the morning? Not to Tom's, that's for darn-tootin! That lazy bastard is at home, in bed.

No wonder so many people protest Walmart, now that they offer vagina waxing they pretty much run the world. Poor Tom's, maybe if he offered milkshakes too business would be booming.

Oh, Tom has milkshakes too (and they're damn good, old -fashioned, 50's style milkshakes), it's a vagina waxing emporium and malt shoppe. But Tom's only one man. He can only wax so many vaginas and make so many milkshakes in one day. His son didn't want to take up the family business (he went off to law school), and Mrs. Tom had to stop doing ball-waxings since her arthritis got worse, so they lost that side of the business. To boot, Tom insists on being home in time for Matlock, so they're only open until 6:00pm, and not at all on Sundays. I mean, what if a gal wants to get herself spruced up before heading over to church on a Sunday morning? It's really no way to run a business.

I heard Tom can't keep up with the trends...like for instance if a gal wants a palm tree he makes it look like a pine tree or if she wants a sun he makes a crop circle. Madness.

Skoosh

HOPEFUL

New Orleans, LA

JUN 17, 2011 08:04 PM

RudieCantFail said:

rerusynjeh said:
Lesson learned- I should have gone to Tom's.

Bonus: The milkshakes can also be used to numb your bits if you find Tom's waxing technique to be less than gentle. No need for special panties!

Wait Tom does the waxing? Hmmm

And it wasn't Matlock, it was MacGyver. Get it right.

And every good girl gets spruced up before going to church.

RudieCantFail

Baton Rouge, LA

January 2006

JUN 17, 2011 08:04 PM

Nea said:
I heard Tom can't keep up with the trends...like for instance if a gal wants a palm tree he makes it look like a pine tree or if she wants a sun he makes a crop circle. Madness.

His eyesight ain't what it used to be, that's for sure.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

Skoosh

HOPEFUL

New Orleans, LA

JUN 17, 2011 08:05 PM

Nea said:

RudieCantFail said:

Nea said:

RudieCantFail said:

Nea said:

Greaser said:
The quality of vagina waxing has gone downhill since WalMart came along and put all the mom & pop vagina waxers out of business.

I remember the wax I got from Walmart, it didn't work. Blasphemy.

Well it's not that Wal-Mart brand vagina waxings are high-quality, they're just so cheap. They come into town, set up shop right off the interstate with plenty of free parking, while Tom's Good Old Fashioned Vagina Waxing Emporium and Malt Shoppe on Main Street has metered parking, and Main Street is only a one-way street. Then Wal-Mart undersells them on both the vagina waxings and he frosty chocolate milkshakes. And if it's a 24-hour Super Wal-Mart? Forget about it. Where else you going to go for a $3.00 vagina waxing at 2:00 in the morning? Not to Tom's, that's for darn-tootin! That lazy bastard is at home, in bed.

No wonder so many people protest Walmart, now that they offer vagina waxing they pretty much run the world. Poor Tom's, maybe if he offered milkshakes too business would be booming.

Oh, Tom has milkshakes too (and they're damn good, old -fashioned, 50's style milkshakes), it's a vagina waxing emporium and malt shoppe. But Tom's only one man. He can only wax so many vaginas and make so many milkshakes in one day. His son didn't want to take up the family business (he went off to law school), and Mrs. Tom had to stop doing ball-waxings since her arthritis got worse, so they lost that side of the business. To boot, Tom insists on being home in time for Matlock, so they're only open until 6:00pm, and not at all on Sundays. I mean, what if a gal wants to get herself spruced up before heading over to church on a Sunday morning? It's really no way to run a business.

I heard Tom can't keep up with the trends...like for instance if a gal wants a palm tree he makes it look like a pine tree or if she wants a sun he makes a crop circle. Madness.

I asked for racing stripes once. She had no idea what I was talking about. I should have run out the fucking door.

Racing stripes, bitch. Really?

Skoosh

HOPEFUL

New Orleans, LA

JUN 17, 2011 08:06 PM

RudieCantFail said:

Nea said:
I heard Tom can't keep up with the trends...like for instance if a gal wants a palm tree he makes it look like a pine tree or if she wants a sun he makes a crop circle. Madness.

His eyesight ain't what it used to be, that's for sure.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

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