The Confession Thread

I once shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.

...

It was a video game, but I don't like what it said about me as a person.

i took the day off to do nothing.

I constantly want to punch noisy children in the face (but doesn't everyone?)

I tripped an annoying kid running through the laundromat last night. He was running around screaming his head off and i nudged my laundry cart into him as he passed by and the fucker went flying. I acted totally concerned too. He starts crying and I'm like "oh man, kid are you ok?" I almost lost it when his mom came up and started yelling at him.

I am almost completely emotionless. . . I confessed to my Mom that I can't remember one day in my life that I was truly happy and she started crying hysterically.

So it's not genetic, then?

I suck at sucking bread made to look like dead zed heads named Ted with twelve inch dicks, family portraits, unrelated pictures and limited and unlimited time.

I like foods that start with A.

apples, avocado, almonds...
not asparagus though.

Tripping is mild compared to what I want to do to children.

Not my children, of course, just other people's kids, haha.

I don't have a 12 inch dick.

I'm having sex with a married woman, and I don't care what it does to her family.

Hey. No fair being serious up in this bitch.

No. Strangely the rest of my family registers their emotions far more often then they allow their logic to dictate Right and Wrong.

Also, my family all thinks I am suppose to be some big deal in life.

I have no idea how to take it, or if I even like it.

+1 to Wingsie.

FUCKING AWESOME to Rory!

Actually, daylessknight is being silly no matter how serious he is

On the other hand Ray is dragging down the place.

Oh fine. . .

I once accompanied a friend as they stole a corpse from the cemetery.

Better.. ish..

Then they did a rain dance in honor of Pierce Brosnan. Their God.

fixed

Actually, the friend pissed on the corpse and later that day wrecked his car in a mountain pass. . .

FUCK PIERCE BROSNAN! The man is scum!!!

I have sex by myself sometimes

I generally fuck myself once a day. . .

Pierce Brosnan is my lord and savior.

You shall be punished!

As long as you realize that Timothy Dalton is the best Bond EVER.

I cried when I read

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

this.