Why is no one kissing my ass?

BDeyeD,

NL is on the other side of the planet. Otherwise I would happily sink my teeth into your ass.

Apple donuts > apple danishes

just saying...

Forget the danishes. Danishes are soooo yesterday. Now I'm craving some Dr. Pepper and Cool Ranch Doritos.

And an ass massage. PaulNikon? You're up. Keep the teeth to a minimum. At least at first.

somebody come over and make a taco ring.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

BDeyeD can i offer you homemade cream cheese icing on slightly toasted bagels? With fresh made sweet tea? And a movie, snuggles on the couch to watch a movie!

...

I accept.

and now, I shall play my harp.

- Danish?
- No, I'm Swedish.

Drama in Scandinavia.

I'm sorry, we can't be friends any more. Everyone knows the only Doritos that matter are nacho cheese.

Wait - I got it! You eat your cool ranch, then I don't have to share mine.

On their way, ma'am!

This job is really stressful. When is "Bring a bomb to work day"?

I hope it's soon. As long as it's after casual sex Friday.

I'M TURNING 30 IN A LITTLE OVER 24 HOURS!!!! WHY ISN'T EVERYONE TELLING ME HOW YOUNG I LOOK, GODDAMN IT?!!!!

Generally, I feel pretty stupid stating the absolutely obvious...

Are you sure you're old enough to be on this site?

Gawd bless you both.

Hey! I made you a demotivator on command!

I know, I just like being demanding.

Please don't hit me.

Make me another demotivator on Thursday and I won't have to.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!! How old ? 24 right? cause you look like your 24!