I can still hit on 21 year-olds, but I don't want to!

So I was in the bar tonight...and I noticed the beautiful woman looking at me. She was like across between Claire Forlani & Natalie Portman. She was really pretty.

Anyway...when she was about to leave...and separated from the all-male crowd she was with...I introduced myself. She was receptive. We made small talk. I asked her for her number....then she asked me how old I was. I said "42"...to which she replied "oh.....I'm 21.....meet me behind the 7-11" and vanished.

So I met her there and had a wonderful time. She is now sleeping in my bed next to my wife and our Great Dane, Duke. How the hell do I get rid of her? I cannot support two women and a big dog.

Send her to my house. I have a wife and a small dog. Neither eat much. I can handle it.

Can I just trade the dog?

lOl. Send her my way

Sorry, got a weight limit on dogs in my lease. Nothing on women though.....

I'm looking for a woman that's a cross between Cleopatra and Joan of Arc who's pre-historic with a trust fund and a good insurance policy who thinks I'm a stud at my age but whose bandages aren't totally dried out.

I have strange desires

Goddammit, I had my parody all in the pipeline and I got distracted and left it sitting unposted. Slick, Sid. Very slick.

Sorry meatboy!

can't she just take the place of your dog, i mean wouldn't it be easier to train her to lick peanut butter off your than it would be to train the dog?

Take photos of the three of them in bed and use it to get a divorce, kill three birds (read: 2 birds and a dog) and be a free man again.

Just a thought.