One time, I...

an hour ago...........laughed so hard at some weird as twisted piece of bipolar logic that my secretary presented me with that I spat nachos all over her!!!!! and I'm still laughing about it now..........

poor thing

and the statement was regarding animal testing on cosmetics and joing PETA.........., "but its only wrong if you eat them, they're still alive , just sorta in pain.........."

I think PETA would love to have her.......

...dressed up as a flapper and accompanied my friend who was dressed up like Lucy from "I Love Lucy" and went to the Mall, just for kicks. It was nowhere near Halloween.

Sadly I didn't get past "pow..." since that's when my foot collapse and ended in me laughing, saying ow ow ow and throwing the wallet to my boss. It was really sad that I didn't even get to finish saying it...

...farted in the bathtub.

..spent four hours on my friends bathroom floor having a terrifyingly bad trip.

threw up behind my friends couch at a party and just decided it was time to leave before anybody noticed

...got really hammered at a friend's apartment when someone thought it'd be funny to lock me out on the balcony. I thought it'd be funny to play Batman and jump off said balcony which was on the second story. I didn't get hurt cuz I was invincible.

...drank an entire bottle of port, an entire bottle of champagne, and half of a box of wine (shut-up, that shits classy in North Carolina) then drove home and made beef stew (That canned Dinty Moore crap) over rice and simultaneously had alcohol and food poisoning. I hated my life for the next 2 weeks and swore off getting completely drunk (buzzed is ok) or eating Dinty Moore ever again and I've stuck to that. It's been 5 years.