Ask Anything!

Depends.

What would I have to do?

I was thinking the role of personal sex slave might be appropriate

why can't I think of a question to ask?

You were thinking about the personal sex slave thing and it distracted you.

When should I have a shower?

as soon as I can get there

why am I being such a perv today?

It's Pervday?

What are you going to do for the next twenty minutes? I am going to shower in that time.

I may stay here & enjoy Pervday alone until your return


why are camera flashes so expensive?

Because it's a conspiracy.

Do you know any other conspiracy theories?

I do but I can't mention it cos "they" might be watching
*looks around nervously*

do you think I'm being paranoid?

No, not at all.

Do you think soup would be a good lunch?

Yes.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

He could chuck as much wood as his little woodchuck heart desires.

Have you seen my stapler?

Yes. You're not having it back.

Do you have any bacon?

I think my omnipresent friend Ergerherger has it. He also has ADD, so be gentle with him.

Ron Paul or Willy Wonka: Who has the better loompas?

I think they should... get together and breed superloompas.

Do you want to buy a stapler?

Yes.

How much?

Ummm... I'll trade it for some bacon.

Fair deal?

If I can stop Ergerherger from running off with it, yes.

What would be a fair replacement if I can't get said bacon?

Money to buy bacon. A lot of bacon.

How much money do you have?

Thirteen and a half cents.

I don't have to work off my debt as a sex slave, do I?

Ummm... no. But go out and catch me a pig so that I can kill it for bacon.

Is it worth all this for a stolen stapler?

depends on the stapler.


Why do I have to go to work?

Yes.

My last question: went too far?

EDIT: Damn it, too slow.

Because work gives you money, and with money, you can buy bacon.

How hungry must I be to keep this bacon thing up for so long?

Hungry enough to kill a pig.

Where do babies come from?

bacon.

bacon?