Sex Talk

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12/1/05
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Knigel

Knigel

Vancouver, BC
November 2005

NOV 22, 2005 07:47 PM

I really don't think I like it, am I weird?

I like everything up until, and it does have some good feelings, but I don't like it. I can go for a very long time, but feel like I'm supposed to do it. Do people get insulted if the other doesn't cum?

Quirky

Quirky

Birmingham, AL
October 2005

NOV 22, 2005 07:50 PM

People do feel like they can't please you.

Nixon

Nixon

SUICIDEGIRL

California, USA

NOV 22, 2005 08:13 PM

yep. It's wierd.

thunderbolts

thunderbolts

Toronto, ON
February 2004

NOV 22, 2005 08:21 PM

yeah that's a new one on me but I have a couple of quick guesses:

a) maybe you don't deal well with feeling like you're out of control even if it's only for a brief moment.

b) or possibly you grew up being told that it was bad and there is too much guilt associated with getting off.

c)..or you just don't want it to be over.

d) all of the above?

..or maybe you just plain don't like it ..some people don't like chocolate either.



HoneySpider

HoneySpider

Wakefield, RI
November 2005

NOV 22, 2005 08:25 PM

It is a little odd, to be truthful.

SuntLacrimae

SuntLacrimae

Eugene, OR
October 2005

NOV 22, 2005 08:37 PM

Get thee to a nunnery. You'd fit right in! tongue But seriously, yeah, that's a bit unusual. If it bothers *you*, you can work on it now. If not, you can wait until you have a regular sex buddy/partner/fill-in-the-blank whom it does bother. For my part, if I had a _________ who was up front and honest about such things beforehand and didn't seem pathological about it, I'd just let it go.

desidia

desidia

Reunion
September 2002

NOV 22, 2005 08:54 PM

Well... an orgasm on my part does generally mean about a 60% chance that I'm going to stop fucking for at least 15 minutes but most likely until the next day. So yeah, sometimes I don't like cumming.

Also when I was in elementary and thought I invented masturbation I used shampoo for lubricant and sometimes it would burn the next time I came. I couldn't of disliked it that much though or I would have stopped shocked

muert0

muert0

Baton Rouge, LA
November 2005

NOV 22, 2005 09:42 PM

I'll quit as long as I know the other person got off. Especially if I've been drinking or I'm under the influence of some other chemicals. It's not that I don't like to get off. I just don't care if I get off. I'm more satisfied getting when I make some one else get theirs. I wouldn't feel bad about it if I were you. If you don't like it you don't like it.

deadskinrose

deadskinrose

Norwalk, CA
June 2005

NOV 22, 2005 09:47 PM

if i cant make my boyfriend cum i feel useless whatever

so yes i think thats wierd

numbers

numbers

New York, NY
November 2002

NOV 22, 2005 09:56 PM

Is it that you don't like cumming, or that you aren't happy with the process leading up to it? I'm asking because I've had experience with just this thing. When a man pleasures himself, he tends to find the best and quickest way possible. Sometimes, this action doesn't resemble actual vaginal intercourse, simply because of the way he does it. This was the case for me for many years. I'd wager that I've faked more orgasms than a lot of women (thank god for condoms). Recently I discovered (with one of the first women I've slept with more than three times) that it isn't that I can't cum, but simply that it takes a little extra work on my part to find the exact way I need to position myself to make it work. At first, I was a little taken aback by this, but then I realized that every time I make a woman cum, it's through a method at least slightly different than every other one (unique like snowflakes, ya' know?). Anyway, in only a week or so, I've found that I've become VERY adaptable. So just experiment, she (or he) will understand. If not, I'd assert that she (or he) is not worth being intimate with consistently.

I'm not sure if this has ANYTHING to do with your issue, but it's something that is important to me (for reasons I expressed) and if it helps, good. If not, well, you only had to read one rambling paragraph (which you should be used to on this site.)

Eener

Eener

Bossier City, LA
November 2005

NOV 22, 2005 10:02 PM

a guy that doesnt like to get off....hmmmm i would think that was just a little bit on the unusual side, but hey whatever floats your boat

Eener

Eener

Bossier City, LA
November 2005

NOV 22, 2005 10:13 PM

a guy that doesnt like to get off....hmmmm i would think that was just a little bit on the unusual side, but hey whatever floats your boat

numbers

numbers

New York, NY
November 2002

NOV 22, 2005 10:25 PM

It's important to remember that we're wired to like cumming. Survive and reproduce and all that jazz. If you don't like it, something is off. Maybe it's your choice of partner, or a hang-up you have, or even something broader involving your sexuality. Don't deprive yourself of one of the few joys we get to have just by being human. Look into it, and good luck. And take advantage of the myriad of opinions and personalities within this community. It's a privilage you get to have simply by paying a nominal amount (thanks Sean and Missy) and reading. Feel free to hit my journal or email me through the site if you want to talk about it further.

Best,
numbers

turmoille

turmoille

Saint Stephen, SC
November 2005

NOV 22, 2005 11:03 PM

yeah, id say thats the strangest shit ive ever heard of. surreal

lioness4

lioness4

Rock Island, IL
May 2005

NOV 22, 2005 11:13 PM

yeah, pretty weird. personally its my favorite part(s) of sex, but hey it's you're sex life. i am curious what your partners think, though.

Starkie

Starkie

Seattle, WA
October 2004

NOV 22, 2005 11:35 PM

I doesn't have to be your favorite part. but yes, weird, turn in your man card immediately.

Blueberries

Blueberries

I'm lost
September 2005

NOV 22, 2005 11:36 PM

Yes. Yes it is very strange.

honsolo

honsolo

Victoria, BC
April 2005

NOV 22, 2005 11:39 PM

usally thats a bad sign.. have you had much drama in you life?

StickyRice

StickyRice

Atlanta, GA
January 2003

NOV 22, 2005 11:56 PM

Not weird at all (you might be surprised how not-weird, especially in males!). It's often a "control" matter with men, who resist letting the woman determine how they feel. How strongly. So they delay orgasm.

Some guys focus on whether the woman is "allowing" them to feel pleasure.

Forget that! Fuck her! It's what she wants: for you to enjoy yourself, for you to take her, to love everything about her. Taste her, attack her, enjoy her. You'll be much more able to orgasm -- and much more eager to come! -- if you forget who has control and enjoy yourself.

*sends an invoice* smile

honsolo

honsolo

Victoria, BC
April 2005

NOV 23, 2005 12:34 AM

hehe i think dr drew would have to differ on that opinion wink

SomethingStupid

SomethingStupid

North Hollywood, CA
March 2004

NOV 23, 2005 12:40 AM

I don't get why you'd ask this question. If virtually everyone but you likes orgasms a lot, yes, it's weird. Doesn't necessarily make it bad, but it's definitely outside of the norm.

Al

Al

SUICIDEGIRL

Christmas Island

NOV 23, 2005 12:43 AM

That's got to be one of the strangest things I've ever heard.

hey_fukko

hey_fukko

Medford, OR
September 2003

NOV 23, 2005 12:52 AM

I know that if I can't make/help my partner to cum, I feel useless. She never has to worry about that because I pretty much always orgasm. In fact, I have to "control" myself throughout sex so I don't cum first. I try to make sure she gets hers before I get mine.


SPOILERS! (Click to view)

But then I think of Al and totally blow my load.



It isn't that I don't like to cum. I really, really, really like it. It's just a better feeling for me if I know she's got hers too.

Kirby

Kirby

SUICIDEGIRL

USA

NOV 23, 2005 01:12 AM

i cant orgasm. even my myself. confused but its sort of one of those things where... since i've never done it, i dont feel like im missing out on much, you know?

SomethingStupid

SomethingStupid

North Hollywood, CA
March 2004

NOV 23, 2005 01:37 AM

Kirby said:
its sort of one of those things where... since i've never done it, i dont feel like im missing out on much, you know?


Truthfully, I'm baffled by this feeling.

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