Epic masturbation

Okay, so anyone you ever decide to go ahead and masturbate whilst taking a shower, but somewhere along the way you aren't realing feeling it, and the arousal starts to wane. 9 out of 10 times, when that happens you're just like, "ngh, maybe later", but then you get that little primal urge that says "Fuck later, it's time to orgasm.", motivating you to a frenzy of physical stimulation until your body can no longer refuse. You experimentally utilize different random viscous fluids, awkward positions and various angles, all in an effort to RIP the stubbornly pending satisfaction. You dredge up past liaisons and fantasies simultaneously, barraging yourself with memories and visciously abusing yourself because that fucking orgasm WILL NOT DEFEAT YOU.

And then you finally finish, so thoroughly enervated and maddened you can't stifle that loud last gasp Out of breath, weak in the knees, a little dizzy... then you catch your breath, and it feels the same way as when you win a fight, or finish a good book... You actually get a feeling that borders on nirvana from your autoerotic perseverence. You feel like you accomplished something worthwhile beyond the usual momentary gratification and it just makes the rest of your day better?



[Edited on Nov 08, 2005 by Darke]

i'm gonna have to go with a "no" on this one.

nothing like soap in the pee hole.



but yeah... i.. have a friend... who would agree with you 60%.

Uh, Nnnnnnnoooooo......

Usually at that point you're late for work/school/social obligation so any satisfaction is swiftly made moot.

umm ...i dont think soo

Yeah I was late to a job interview because of that today. My body was not listening and I was not going to give up untill I got the job done!

I got through exactly what you described 2 out of 3 days, except the dizzy accomplished feeling.

Now what would be the soundtrack to epic masturbation?

hmmm... personally, I'd go with something triumphant or dire... perhaps "Night on Bald Mountain" or "The 1812 Overture".... The cannons at the end would be a nice touch. Maybe "Carmina Burana", that's pretty intense, too.

soundtrack?

Clubbed to Death by Rob D?

arg, no soap... try a nice moisturizing hair conditioner

Happens all the time, but not in the shower. I spend enough time in there as it is without jacking off.

hmm...i think i'm gonna have a shower!

Yeah I really hate it when that happens....They you just sit there going well This sucks But damn it I'm gonna get this one out! lol Then you feel ohhh soo good!

I'm thinking "Mortal Kombat".

Achilles Last Stand and the Battle of Evermore by Led Zeppelin would be in there, too.

Commodus: Let's see you manage a sly one off the wrist in manacles masturbatus maximus.
Maximus: Feel that poking into your navel Commodus? That's twelve inches of centurion's wood. And all I have to do is think to make it spurt all over you.

How about the song that goes 'One way or another I'm gonna getcha, I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha...'

If you couls time it to the 1812 Overture, well, that would be special.

Absolutely, and I had $50 that thought that Morgan started this thread.

Is it me, or is it 20X harder to masturbate in the shower? I just can't do it that well. Out on dry land, I'm the fuckin' jerk-off king. In the shower, I'm barely a squire.

[Edited on Nov 08, 2005 by Subrosa]

DJ Rob Base.