Does The Truth Hurt?

Okay so I have been once that I was bad in the Fucking Department.. and was straight up told.. that it could have been better (course her tits could have been a little nicer too) but what I want to know.. Is do you want the truth if you werent all that hot in the sack? or would you tell someone...

I'd like to be told, and I would tell..... but jeeeesus would I ever word it as tactfully as humanly possible, and as early on as possible. I'd hate to look back and think 'so, all that time... I sucked badly? Augh!'

I don't think it's possible to universally be a dud root, though. Anybody who doesn't like what their partner is doing should tell them so, but the comment's not in the vein of 'obviously you suck, because otherwise I'd be enjoying it more'.

If I'm not doing it right, I'd wanna know... but more along the lines of "try it this way" than "you're lame in bed." I give my partners the same courtesy.

truth kills.

no one can handle being told they suck in bed.

helpful suggestions are much more useful

I try to be helpfully instructive. Most people have the potential to be great in bed, if they're willing to learn. All you really need are nerve endings, empathy, and the good sense to practice and listen.

I've never had any complaints, except when I was 17 and my girlfriend said she needed to teach me how to kiss...fortunately I'm a good student and I'm pretty frequently complimented on my kissing these days. So, I really appreciate constructive criticism. I don't think I'd like to hear "Man, you suck at _____." but I wouldn't mind hearing "It would be better if you _____ when you _____." I don't really respect the opinion of someone who says something just to make me feel bad without offering anything useful about how I can overcome whatever failing they're percieving.

The truth only hurts when you stick it in the wrong place.

the problem is sex is different for everyone.
what feels good for some people, others hate entirely.

if this shit was communicated EARLY on, there would be no need to hurt feelings. The first time you fuck somone TELL THEM WHAT YOU LIKE GODDAMMIT!

Paul says: "I'm quite healthy thank you, crazy, but healthy..."

Anyone else find this funny coming from someone named "Lies"?

Sorry... I just couldn't resist.

Personally I would like to hear the truth... but, Deelishus_Weenie said it right... there's something to be said for tact.

Yes, the truth hurts . . . if you're a pussy.

Man the fuck up!

If she tells you what you're doing wrong, you only stand to get better.

I prefer instruction DURING rather than AFTER, but what can you do?

Here's my on complaint, practice! I won't get any better if I don't get to practice. My ex told me I was like a dead fish ... well duh! He's the only person I've ever had sex with. And I'd like to say in the end I was a little better (emphasis on little).

My point is, great, give constructive criticism, but it doesn't do any good to just tell someone, sometimes you need to show them and let them practice it to get better.

Yes, I would like to be told, but I would like it to be done with a little care and consideration. I can normally tell the difference between someone being constructive and someone being nasty.

The flip side is that I don't automatically assume that criticisms are valid. I will question what people say, which works well with confident people. They can say what they think, but they need to accept me probing them to see if they truely have a point...

How can you progress if people just lie and fake enjoyment?

Although I've never been told I suck in bed, I have been told if something isn't working, or could be done better. It's not insulting, it's trying to make it the best experience possible with the other person.

id rather not know. i just assume i suck

I'm not reading all those!!

constructive critizism is good, in fact welcomed .... nicely

I'd never tell a guy that, especially if I was really into him. I would ask him to do things that I know pleasure me - ask for "harder," "faster," and so on. I would ask him to do things like act a certain way in bed (my kink of choice: domination.) But I would NEVER say: "Look here, old fellow, did you know that you're bad in bed?" Well, not unless he pissed me off, LOL j/k

Just because you've had sex with several people doesn't mean the same technique will work on every person. Because of this, I feel almost like a rookie whenever I'm with a new person. I don't know what's going to work and what's going to irritate them, so of course I appreciate constructive criticism. Not every guy is going to like the way I kiss or touch him, so I'd rather he tell me during instead of just throwing, "You suck," in my face after several nights together.

On the reverse, I know guys aren't psychic, so I don't hold it against someone if he doesn't kiss me or fuck me "properly" on the first go. That's what communication is for. That's part of the fun of beginning something new. You get to learn each others' bodies and explore all sorts of techniques.

Now, if repeated instruction and communication just isn't doing the job and the person is completely stuck in their sucky ways after a few weeks, then it's time to let them go back into the wild to find a new mate. I've never told someone they sucked, but, "It's just not working for me. I don't think we're very compatible," has popped up from time to time.

If I care about you and want to continue a relationship...I'll be truthful but with a modicum of tact. If I don't care...we're just not going to fuck anymore.

I've never been told that, however I would want to know, yes... I'd rather be inadequate than deceived.