Asking for a blowjob

Is this a total asshole thing to do? Just wondering. I have been with a fair amount of guys in my days and am quite good at giving routine blow jobs. Even in relationships which have lasted years I never had a guy strait up ask me for a blowjob however the current guy I'm with has no problem asking and really kinda putting me on the spot as if I would be a jerk to say " no" in the moment. We have known each other for years but have not really developed a relationship yet where we can say "yes" and "no" comfortably. Really if the guy i was in a relationship with for years asked me I would have no problem with it because we knew each other well enough that I could have said "no" comfortably with no hard feelings on either end if I really had to say "no" . The current guy I feel is kinda sexually manipulative. Plus he admits it takes him forever to cum from a blowjob. Maybe its just me though. Guys do you strait up ask for them? and girls have you strait up been asked?

Generally don't ask, but then, between both myself and my partner working and the two kids, I feel I would be cheating her out of her fun if I used some of the limited time we have left for sex for solely my own pleasure

This is a tricky question....

If you're not in the mood to give one, don't do it. Nothing is worse that sucking on a cock you don't want to. If you feel like you can't say no, but your still willing to do it, don't do it long. What's he going to say "Get the fuck back down there?" No; just like you don't want to say "No".

The only girls that I let blow me are the ones who love to do it. They end up asking or just doing it. But they love having my cock in their mouth. If you aren't that kind of girl, get to where you can end it quickly or just don't do it long.

But to answer your question, you can, and should be able to, say no.

I ask for blow jobs once I know that the girl 1. Can do it right 2. Does it right 3. Enjoys doing it right.

I will also talk about it before we even sleep together. I'll ask her how she feels about giving head and if she hmmm's and ummm's then I don't ask. If she likes to do it, she will usually tell you and it might be okay to ask her. But if I sense that she really isn't into it then I don't ask.

Other times I'll give HER really good head and then she might do it back.

All in all it depends... Lol...

Hope this helped...

Blaino

Thanks. Yeah I actually enjoy it and like I said have no problem doing it on a regular basis. Its just this guy kinda pisses me off just asking for it when he won't even open up to talk about other stuff and he puts me on the spot as if I'm leaving him hanging if I don't do it for him. Even though I enjoy it I'm not always in the mood and yeah I need to know you well enough to say "no" especially when put on the spot like that.

You are like a lot of other girls that I have met, in that the love to do it, but they don't want to be asked to do it. I've found that most the time if I don't ask, she will do it.

There was this ginger that I was fucking and every time she got drunk and I was driving her home she would blow me on the ride home Didn't even have to ask, she just did. My ex use to ask me if she could and would so it for 20 or 30 minutes. I wouldn't have to cum. She wouldn't let me. She would make me fuck her before I came and that is a whole other subject...

Anyways, there is nothing worse than a half assed blow job. If I were you, I'd quit giving them till he quit asking. Then when he learns to keep his mouth shut, give him a blow job that he'll never forget

Blaino

right!
That is what I'm saying. I end up doing it really pissed off. If I felt like we were emotionally more open and on par I wouldn't care so much if he asked. But he is not emotionally open with me and really I feel has some serious control issues so yeah it juts pisses me off.

Say no, see what happens, sex should be an enjoyable experience for both parties in a healthy relationship in my very unprofessional opinion. If you say no and he ends up getting all bitchy at you then maybe you need to reassess whether or not this guy treats you in the manner you wanted to be treated. If he cares at all about your feelings and comfort on what is honestly a very delicate matter, then he wont freak out, which he probably wouldn't because it honestly sounds like your batting a thousand at the moment so even if you do say no more often now you will stay be saying yes to his...requests far more than you'll be saying no. And if thats not something he can appreciate than boot his ass.

Tell him to take a yoga class until he can do it himself.

It kinda sounds to me like the emotional closure exists on both sides of the relationship. I mean, not to put the OP on the spot, but you're telling strangers on the Internet that you give angry blowjobs, but you're not telling the guy you're blowing that you're angry. And that's, y'know, your call--sometimes people just need to let of steam and/or get some outside perspective, and bitching to strangers on the Internet can be a valid and useful way to do both of those things. But if communication needs to happen in your relationship, somebody's gotta start it up, and there's only one person posting here who can make that happen.

Yes mastageneral . I should be able to say "No" and not have him freak out. I have a hard time saying "no" because I am a people pleaser. No pun intended but yeah I'm gonna try this next time if I'm really not feeling it.

Yes I should suggest yoga. That made me crack up Coyotemike.

Motorfire I totally agree. I would love to not be telling strangers on the internet this crap and tell him directly but without going into too much detail he basically refuses to have conversations like this or about anything important for that matter. Really I realize that it is impossible to have a real realtionship like this but I'm trying to give him a bit of a chance. Maybe he has just been hurt in the past or needs time to trust me. But prob. not. I know. I have cared for him for a long time so I
m just trying to at least connect somewhat with him even if its not a realtionship which will work forever. I'm really left navigating on my own how much I can tolerate of some behavior which I'm also not really allowed to address with him therefore my need for some outside advice on this matter.

*Love it!* Lol...

Just out of curiosity, and don't answer this if you don't feel comfortable, but does he give you head? Is it any good? Or is it a one way street? Do you ever ask him to do things for you in bed? What is his reaction?

If he isn't as accommodating as you are, the I would agree with masta, and say that you may want to re-asses you relationship. Sex is about both people pleasing each other, and you should enjoy the sex, and everything that is done before, during of after, should be equally pleasing for both of you. It isn't your job to be his fuck doll, unless that's what you want, but some how I don't think that is the case. He needs to learn to be more open to what you want in bed, if he doesn't, then find someone who is. There are many guy out there who will listen to what you say and do what you ask in the sack.

Blaino

No one should be demanding when they're in a position to have their dick bitten.

Just push their head down. It's like international sign language.

FWIW



Not much more than a grin.

So if you think this guy is sexually manipulative and you feel uncomfortable saying no, I would give serious thought to not dealing with this guy. It is not your responsibility to get him off if you don't feel like it and the fact that he may think it is would be a red flag to me.

:edited to add: asking for a blowjob itself isn't wrong or a bad thing to do. Expecting a blowjob just cause you asked is what I have the problem with.

My current wife told me to ask if I wanted one. She didn't promise I'd always get it, but said I shouldn't be afraid to ask. My ex-wife probably attempted it 3 times in the 13 years we were together. I'm pretty sure asking her for a blow job would have gotten me laid even less than I already did.

It's not something I ask for, though I am good about giving compliments when I am with a partner that gives a great one, so she knows it's welcome and appreciated.

I only ask (or tell) if I think she wants me to, and I'm pretty conservative about determining that she does.

just whip your cock out

Hahaha Kevin I heart you.
Yes I have been asked. And yes I like being asked. I am somewhat shy esp in bed sometimes and i also like being dominated, therefore I would rather be told then me just do it. Its not rude, its getting what you want by asking for it. I think it should be more of a command than a question though. Questions can be awkward to answer. Don't give the girl (or boy) a choice.

I'll whip it out and tell her to kiss it! Maybe even slap her with it a couple times just to tease

So long as you're respectful and complimentary, I don't see anything wrong with asking for them. That being said, I've found it much more effective to ask if there's some way I can pleasure her. I've found women are usually more creative and energetic when they're paying me back than paying it forward.