cheating debate

There is a debate raging among some of my friends right now and I would love to hear some other opinions. It seems to be divided by girls vs. boys currently.

Important background information is that it involves a male and female friend—male in long-term relationship and female single. After a lot of flirty times hanging out, they let their flirting go too far. There was a digital camera present which one used to take a nude picture of herself. Then the other went into another room to “use” the picture. Afterwards, they switched roles.

The debate is over whether or not this is cheating. It has been agreed that if they were in the same room masturbating and directly looking at each other, that would have crossed the line. His girlfriend already knows what happened so that is not an issue.

Hmm.. it's definitely shady, but I dunno if it's "cheating". It would certainly break my heart though, if it were my girlfriend, and rightly so I think.

Cheating? No. Creepy and wrong? Oh, yeah.

wow yeah, i would be really upset.. but i dont really know if i would break up with the guy for it.. as i would if he really cheated on me.. but i might be concerned that something like that could lead to more in the future.. if he is willing to masturbate to a nude picture of someone he knows, he may go a bit farther

Ew. Just... ew.

I say it depends on the pixel resolution of the camera

I'm not sure if I'd specifically count it as cheating, but I'd be very annoyed.

Well, don't drum me out of the men's club for this.......but to me, that sounds like cheating.

I don't view "cheating" as simply putting slot A into tab B. There's a lot of emotional stuff involved. There's probably a level of trust between the guy, his female friend and his girlfriend. The girlfriend, while she may be suspicious of the time they spend together, probably doesn't have a major problem with the guy & his female friend spending time.

Cheating also isn't an exact formula. It's really a case by case basis depending on your relationship.

When faced with a dilemna, I always use two criteria: "Would I want her doing this with another guy?" and "Would I do this if she were here?"

If this situation came up with me....and it was my girlfriend who was wanking to another guy's pic, just while he was on the other side of the door? I'd be quite pissed.

as usual... rockin! lmfao

I believe anything sexual that is done behind your partner's back is cheating. Most girlfriends would not be happy about their boyfriend jibbing jimmy while looking at someone they know naked, even if it is just a photograph.

i'd say cheating, i mean its ok to fantacize about others while in a relationship to some extent, as well as look at pictures of others, but when it comes down to friends, and your in the room next to the person thats getting hot over you that seems a little cheaty. i at least would feel as though the other person cared nothing about me. doing it right in the next room almost is flagrantly giving the opportunity for action afterwards.

Wow, ideas really vary here too! Just to clarify, it's the guy who has a significant other.

I say cheating, and it is reasons like this that I dont own a gun. The chick should dump him.

I disagree and think that it is cheating, but that's besides the point I want to make.

Why is it creepy? Because they're masturbating to pictures? Keep in mind what site you're on.

as above, and since they seem to have gone as close to actually doing it in the same room as they could, then they alsoknewthat it was cheating and were just trying to get round the issue

Huh...I don't think any of us here had even looked at it like that.
Good point.

I don't quite know if I'd count it as cheating, but it's sure in a very grey zone. It's also the most roundabout way of being unfaithful I've ever heard of. I don't think I'd be too happy about it, but I doubt I'd dump someone for it unless I was already looking for an excuse...

I need to see the pictures to decide.

tha point here is that he WANTS to fuck his friend!
... "intent" is 90% of it, (it's what decides between Manslaughter/10-20 years and Murder/life-death penalty, btw)
intebnt and the act both count.
if you intend to cheat, you cheated. but if you don't intend to and do anyhow, you are still cheating.

if you caught your man/woman checking into a hotel room with someone, and stopped them before they even got to the room and before anything happened....

cheating!




[Edited on Mar 02, 2004 by Stirfry]

I'm well ahead of you there.