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AfroBlue

AfroBlue

Mexico
August 2006

FEB 16, 2010 01:10 PM


ok, so i met this Rastafarian girl, we started going out and and spending time together. she has plans to study in another state and she will only be here like 2 more weeks. so i figure i will make the most of the love im able to give and receive.

now she tells me she wants to be a mother and she wants me to "donate the sperm", she says she wont ask anything of me, she just wants this so much and feels this is what she was meant to do.

im ok with the idea of having a child, but i wonder if there will be future doubts or anxiety. Maybe my parents will be heartbroken if i tell them i have a child somewhere out there so i shoudnt tell them, or maybe the life style that im living wont be of any good to me or others once the kid grows up and needs me.

i know theres overpopulation everywhere and it should be better for her to look into adoption, and how the world events are turning out i feel like everything will slowly start to fall appart in the years to come. so how can i decide to bring another life to witness all of this.

But she says that there arent any "ideal" situations and that this is what she wants to do while she is young so she can enjoy her "womanhood".

i have friends who have kids and to all of them this has been a turning point in theyre lives, they are all happy but they tell me that having a kid changes them since now they dont live for themself alone.

So does this mean that i am about to make the mistake of my life or would this be considered a beautiful conscious gesture of friendship and love?

i Would appreciate any comments on the subject.

IDGAS

IDGAS

Boston, MA
March 2004

FEB 16, 2010 01:25 PM

If you "donate" the sperm you will be on the hook for child support. If she wants a kid have her go to a sperm bank. Or you should get a lawyer involved before your donation is made.

Lucifer69133

Lucifer69133

I'm lost
February 2009

FEB 16, 2010 01:56 PM

IDGAS said:
If you "donate" the sperm you will be on the hook for child support. If she wants a kid have her go to a sperm bank. Or you should get a lawyer involved before your donation is made.



What he said, although my instinct tells me you should run away from her as far as possible.

InkedAffliction

InkedAffliction

Souderton, PA
January 2010

FEB 16, 2010 04:51 PM

If you even consider this, you need to hire an attorney to look into the laws and to draw up a contract which absolves you from all responsibility and have it signed. Do not, I repeat, do not do this on good faith alone or you will get screwed!

Personally, I would not even consider doing this.

bigsmitty

bigsmitty

Beaverton, OR
February 2010

FEB 16, 2010 05:07 PM

No Way in Hell! RUN!

Lucifer69133

Lucifer69133

I'm lost
February 2009

FEB 16, 2010 05:24 PM

InkedAffliction said:
Personally, I would not even consider doing this.



Truth. Unless you REALLY want to become a parent as well, I would say no. You could go through the sort of legal wrangling Inked mentioned to make sure you're not tied down, but that process would likely be a pain in the ass and would probably destroy whatever relationship you have with this girl.

I think you're being taken for a mug here, mate.

Lusyd

Lusyd

HOPEFUL

I'm lost

FEB 16, 2010 06:15 PM

Morgan

Morgan

SUICIDEGIRL

Illinois, USA

FEB 16, 2010 06:36 PM

Wait, isn't this a Law and Order: SVU episode?

Coyotemike

Coyotemike

USA
May 2006

FEB 16, 2010 06:46 PM

Morgan said:
Wait, isn't this a Law and Order: SVU episode?



No, not SVU, it's SUU . . . Special Unit Unit.

IDGAS

IDGAS

Boston, MA
March 2004

FEB 16, 2010 09:22 PM

Coyotemike said:

Morgan said:
Wait, isn't this a Law and Order: SVU episode?



No, not SVU, it's SUU . . . Special Unit Unit.


Damn gas guzzlers get a hybrid

Gringo

Gringo

Spokane, WA
May 2006

FEB 16, 2010 09:58 PM

Dunno, man...I think I have too many questions before I can even begin to offer an opinion/view.




I'm still stuck on trying to figure out how her being a Rastafarian has anything to do with the situation.

Accuser

Accuser

Scottsdale, AZ
October 2006

FEB 16, 2010 09:59 PM

AfroBlue said:
would this be considered a beautiful conscious gesture of friendship and love?



zoom image

DevilsReject

DevilsReject

Cleveland, OH
February 2007

FEB 16, 2010 10:05 PM

AfroBlue said:
i have friends who have kids and to all of them this has been a turning point in theyre lives,



Yes. True. It makes you reorganize your priorities very quickly.

they are all happy but they tell me that having a kid changes them since now they dont live for themself alone.



not so true. not wrong. just not so true. Everything you do is influenced by your child, but you still have time to live for yourself, you just don't have as much time for yourself.

Just out of curiosity, how are you going to "donate"? Are you going to go to a clinic and do it properly, or are you just going to huck it in her and "donate" it your way?

Either way, knowing that i made a child and then not being able to be part of it's life would drive me insane with curiosity on what that child is doing. no dice for me.

Lemonkid

Lemonkid

Canada
May 2003

FEB 16, 2010 10:17 PM

You might be thinking what a romp this is .. but scream, scream, scream and run away...

MisterSatan

MisterSatan

Portland, OR
August 2002

FEB 17, 2010 12:07 AM

I will never stop being mystified at the shit people ask advice for on this website.

"Hey, my cock is swollen and purple, and angry bees fly out of it every six minutes, what should I do?"

GO TALK TO A PROFESSIONAL, YOU FUCKING MORON.

atomicant

atomicant

Portland, OR
June 2003

FEB 17, 2010 12:12 AM

MisterSatan said:
I will never stop being mystified at the shit people ask advice for on this website.

"Hey, my cock is swollen and purple, and angry bees fly out of it every six minutes, what should I do?"

GO TALK TO A PROFESSIONAL, YOU FUCKING MORON.



this man speaks truth.

turin

turin

Denver, CO
October 2003

FEB 17, 2010 12:37 AM

MisterSatan said:
I will never stop being mystified at the shit people ask advice for on this website.

"Hey, my cock is swollen and purple, and angry bees fly out of it every six minutes, what should I do?"

GO TALK TO A PROFESSIONAL, YOU FUCKING MORON.



yeah, the professional "sketchy-ass hippie chicks who want your unaccountable buddy babies" doctor. this advice applies perfectly, as usual.

RudieCantFail

RudieCantFail

Baton Rouge, LA
January 2006

FEB 17, 2010 02:26 AM

This is a bad idea for so many reasons.

First:

IDGAS said:
If you "donate" the sperm you will be on the hook for child support. If she wants a kid have her go to a sperm bank. Or you should get a lawyer involved before your donation is made.



If you do agree to father a child make sure there is some kind of legal agreement defining what your legal obligations to the child and the mother will be.

Secondly, this:

DevilsReject said:
Either way, knowing that i made a child and then not being able to be part of it's life would drive me insane with curiosity on what that child is doing. no dice for me.



Personally, if I had a child, I'd want to be involved in its life, to make sure it was being raised properly, and that its needs were being seen to.

I realize that there are a whole lot of single parents in the world who do an outstanding job of raising their children without the help of a partner (such as DevilsReject). However, I'm sure that in 95% of cases, it was not the goal of the parent to set out to raise a child alone.

As Chris Rock puts it:


Thirdly:

AfroBlue said:
ok, so i met this Rastafarian girl...



So she's a Rastafarian in that she has a deep spiritual belief that Haile Selassie was the second coming of Christ, and will lead the displaced descendants of African slaves back to the mother land? Or is she just somebody with dreadlocks who likes to smoke weed and listen to reggae?

I have nothing against smoking weed, I used to be a huge pothead myself, but if she's ready to take on the responsibility of raising a child (especially by herself) then she should also be willing to quit smoking pot. Especially while she's trying to conceive and while carrying the child.

Honestly, I don't think you or her sound ready for the responsibility of a child.

Tadzi

Tadzi

Greeley, CO
April 2003

FEB 17, 2010 05:13 AM

MisterSatan

MisterSatan

Portland, OR
August 2002

FEB 17, 2010 10:43 AM

turin said:

MisterSatan said:
I will never stop being mystified at the shit people ask advice for on this website.

"Hey, my cock is swollen and purple, and angry bees fly out of it every six minutes, what should I do?"

GO TALK TO A PROFESSIONAL, YOU FUCKING MORON.



yeah, the professional "sketchy-ass hippie chicks who want your unaccountable buddy babies" doctor. this advice applies perfectly, as usual.



Actually, I was thinking of an attorney. But thanks for being a jackass about it.

antipaladin

antipaladin

Italy
March 2005

FEB 17, 2010 11:41 AM

The only thing going through with this will prove is that P.T. Barnum was right.

Coyotemike

Coyotemike

USA
May 2006

FEB 17, 2010 11:58 AM

MisterSatan said:

turin said:

MisterSatan said:
I will never stop being mystified at the shit people ask advice for on this website.

"Hey, my cock is swollen and purple, and angry bees fly out of it every six minutes, what should I do?"

GO TALK TO A PROFESSIONAL, YOU FUCKING MORON.



yeah, the professional "sketchy-ass hippie chicks who want your unaccountable buddy babies" doctor. this advice applies perfectly, as usual.



Actually, I was thinking of an attorney. But thanks for being a jackass about it.



I was thinking "psychiatrist"

SirLazarusCries

SirLazarusCries

Westerville, OH
May 2008

FEB 17, 2010 12:10 PM



I use that drive a car with you feet comparison all the time when people give me that "It can be done" bullshit.

Agy

Agy

SUICIDEGIRL

Ontario, Canada

FEB 17, 2010 12:22 PM

Lusyd said:



YES! Listen to SW fish head dude. ^^

THIS = A BAD IDEA

I think trying to sell cocaine to a group of nuns is a better idea than this.

Please let us know if you go to a lawyer/get professional advice! smile

Coyotemike

Coyotemike

USA
May 2006

FEB 17, 2010 12:44 PM

Agy said:

Lusyd said:



YES! Listen to SW fish head dude. ^^

THIS = A BAD IDEA

I think trying to sell cocaine to a group of nuns is a better idea than this.

Please let us know if you go to a lawyer/get professional advice! smile



Ever seen some of those 1970s low budget films about nuns? Nuns are ALL about the party!

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