Worst first half of the year, everrrrr!!!! What do you think?

I wanted the pefect life. I wanted a family. A wife who loved me. A good career. But above all I wanted to have a child of my own.
I was 20 when i got married. The one girl that I loved with all my heart, i couldnt be with. Her and I dated for 3 years on and off. She was my sweetheart and always will be. But we just couldnt be together. She wasnt ready for a serious relationship. she had a lot of growing up to do.
So do I, but I'm so tired of the little kid dating. relationships that last 2 or 3 months, or less. I've been around. Been alot of places and with girls all over. I'm tired, I just wanted her. But she needed to get herself right.

so.........I had a gf that I had dated for 5 yrs on and off, Katy. we got back together and she was a great person. she loved me just as much as i loved the other girl. she would do anything for me. She would have been the perfect wife and mother. She offered me a family and evrything i wanted.
We got married 2 weeks before i left for Iraq. My best friends told me I was stupid for doing it.
when i left her parents fucked with her becaused we got married. (and because we did it behind their backs) They kept telling her to divorce me.
I called her whenever I could from Iraq but i was always busy.
If i wasnt working, I was eating, sleeping, or in the gym.

Long Story short, while i was in Iraq I got divorce papers sent to me.
I called her and told her that i refused to deal with it until i got home from iraq.

Lucky me I came home early. I got hurt in Iraq when my vehicle flipped over. My left side fell out the driver's side and i broke my leg and 4 fingers. I got Med-Evaced to Germany, then back to the States.
I was in a hospital in Maryland.
The next day that i got to the states, my family came to see me in the hospital. They had to wear yellow gowns and gloves in my room. I was quarantined for a week because i came from over seas.
But my wife came with them. She brought another copy of the divorce papers.\

She and I spoke about it and her dad offered her a car. They also convinced her she was too young and rushed into it. She also figured that we could just get married again.
I was pissed off, but at the same time i was happy. I saw it as a sign. God gave me my life back.
I mean, i didnt change. I want a family, but I still have a lot to do with my life that she would've held me back from.
I need someone who's into what I'm into. Not someone who does organic chemistry when they're bored. (she actually does that) I wanted to shoot myself when I was bored and she suggested going to the library to help her study. all the time. occasional is ok. I love chemistry and physics, cuz im actually good at them. But FUCK!!! she was fucking boring. I need to argue with someone. she just always let me win. I did what ever I wanted.

So I signed the papers. I stopped talking to her. She keeps calling me.
I decided to meet up with her on her way to work.
I stalled so that I only had to spend 30 mins with her until she left for work.
We got to the mall and sat in the food court. I tried wasting time by getting something to eat. it was 3:00. she wanted to leave at 3:15. her job was 15 mins away.
we talked for a while.

I happened to look up and saw my ex, Dom. the one I was in love with. My heart dropped. My ex-wife had seen pictures of her but never met her. it was 3:13.
Dom came downstairs then went back up. she was with her friends. Katy saw her, because she saw my expression. and Me glance in her direction.

Dom came back downstairs and eventually saw me.
She came over and said hi to both of us and introduced me to her friends. She left and sat on the other side of the foodcourt.
Katy got jealous and started trying to "handcuff" me. she put on my METS hat and my LV sunglasses . she was trying to make it seem like her and I were still together so that Dom wouldn't talk to me.
that pissed me off. it was 3:23.
"aren't you going to work?"
"no i don't think i want to"
what?!wtf?
go the fuck to work!!! I didnt say it but i wanted to . I was furious. I left and she followed me. as we walked out my brother was walking in so i told her to go to work and ill talk to her later. she tried making a scene. sawing that I owe it to her to talk at that exact moment about "us". I just left and she went home crying.

I went back down to the foodcourt with my brother while he was eating and Dom came up to me again.
(I had convinced myself that i hated this girl for months so that i woulnd talk to her) I couldnt help it. We exchanged numbers again.

2am the next morning I saw a bunch of missed calls from Katy trying to appologize, as I was leaving Dom's house to go home.

I don't kno what to do. I'm def not gonna be with Katy. I was thinking about moving to connecticut and starting a new life, leaving everything behind. Is Dom worth it?

dude, this is not board worthy. this is what journals are designed for.

Here's a little tip kids - if the relationship is "on and off" for any reason, marriage isn't the way to solve things. Neither is having a kid together.

Stay where you are, move to CT, join a cult, whatever. Find a stable relationship first, then get married.

Wait, so your profile says you are 21 and you dated one girl for 5 years and the other girl for 3 years. So all this "true love" started when you were 13???

He's my hero. I didn't even discover masturbation until 13.

He could have been dating those two women at the same time. I mean you can have two true Loves at once right?

No.
Move on from everyone involved in this story outside of your family.

Whenever I wasn't with one of them I was with the other. I was turning 16 when it all started. And people who l ove each other don't alays have pefect relationships. I loved both on differen ways. Katy was always thee for me but Dom was the one I was most compatible with. We did everyhing together.

Sounds more like you wanted the best of both worlds. Well life ain;t like that son!

My advice:

Tap both they asses. Glaze them donuts. Use a condom, don't get anyone pregnant.

Grow a little. Enjoy life.

Good luck.

This.

Dom told me that day that she met my exwife, that she wanted to be win me and eventualy get married. And how much she missed me and nobody she dated measured up to me

yep.

You're way too young to be taking all this so seriously. You're 21 and you already have an ex wife? Try and keep things in perspective next time around. How you feel right now at this moment is not how you are always going to feel, and you'll be able to see things in a better light when you're a bit more seasoned.

But she only realizes this now that she sees you with another woman? Move on, take a break from relationships, clarify what you actually want before you try choosing someone to spend THE REST OF YOUR LIFE WITH.

I agree with everything that is said here.

- I think your expectations are too high. Marriage, love and family should happen naturally - when everything REALLY is perfect,

- Dont try to force anything. Like force a good relationship out of a mediocre one.

- Move. Make a fresh start with a new life in a completely different area of the country. Let go of all the old baggage and become a new person.

Best of luck!

Connecticut? Surely, you can do better.

connecticut is a good street racing scene

Well, that's certainly one way to choose a place to live.

1. shut up
2. grow the fuck up
3. i hate you