Sex Tricks From Cosmo's Kate White

Cosmo E-I-C Kate White's new book, YOU ON TOP, is full of some dirty advice. I'm copying this from her chapter called "5 Mind-Blowing Sex Tricks." Note that #5 is not very diet friendly. Ha.

1) When fondling your man's panis, slip a hair scrunchy around the base of it. The tight scrunchy combines with you touch creates an amazing sensation.

2) Gather four pillows under your butt before he enters you in the missionary position. The angles this creates adds a new twist and guarantees better contact between his penis and your clitoris. Plus, there's something thrilling about floating up there on all those pillows.

3) When you're on top, pull up your knees and then rock side-to-side as the thrusts. Or move your hips in a swirling motion.

4) Using a bit of lube, make two fists around the shaft of his penis and twist in opposite directions.

5) Slip a glazed doughnut around his penis and nibble it off. In his book I Am Charlotte Simmons, novelist Tom Wolfe mocked our write-up of this move. But perhaps he was just jealous no one had ever tried it on him.

From Kate White's YOU ON TOP

That glazed donut one is sad. I've never been with a man small enough to fit through a donut.

You know who the most popular guy at the nudist colony is, right?

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

The one who can carry 8 donuts and 2 cups of coffee at the same time.

/bad joke

What's a panis?

According to Leon Phelps, if you really want to spice up your sex life, "Do it in the butt."

"Aww yeah."

Apart from #2 and #3, please don't.

Its just a donut. It should stretch or break to the propper fit, or am I giving the average penis too much credit?

If I'm about to get busy with some chick and she starts busting out a box of krispy kreme, I will be escorting her to the door forthwith. There are approximately 7,496 things more interesting, creative and pleasurable things you can do with my cock than eat a fucking donut off of it.

Which part of the word "Cosmo" did you not understand?

Point taken.

Has she ever had sex?

It's Cosmo.

That's all I have to say

Sticky glazed donuts + pubes = FAIL


Makes my gag reflex go all wonky just thinking about it. So sick.

I love to slap a donut on there pre-erection and play Incredible Hulk Rips His Pants with it.

yeah, because the thing i love most is getting an indian burn on my cock.

'Sex tricks' makes it sound like they should be some sort of magic illusions. "Watch as the Amazing Katini pulls a scrotum out of her hat! See the linked cock rings become magically unlinked!"

It's in the ear right?

+1

I hear no man has ever found it and come back alive. Those jungles are dangerous.

Something you put in a vegina.

Also, who the fuck owns a scrunchy these days?

BWAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHA

Also: is there a way to draw up your knees and rock from side to side withOUT looking like a mental patient? Because I am at a loss. "Okay, it's going to look like I'm having traumatic flashbacks and assuming the fetal position atop your dick, but trust me it'll be hot, I swear."

...can't sleep, clown'll eat me... can't sleep clown'll eat me...