NEWS: Scavenging the Depths of Human Misery

MUSIC: Scavenging the Depths of Human Misery

This has apparently been around for a month, which is more or less an eternity in interweb terms, but it didn't pop up on my google-machine till a metafilter-er made it so.

It's like this: Troy, a guy from Boise, ID, makes a fourteen-minute CD professing his love in prose and song for his girlfriend Melissa, in honor of their six month "anniversary." In what may or may not be a coincidence, Melissa breaks up with him three days later. One of Melissa's friends posts the recording on the internet. The whole world is laughing and/or crying. And remixing.

Oh. My.

Everyone needs to listen to this. Everyone.

This is the sound of top 40 love song vocabulary colliding with the awkward clinginess of celebrating a six month anniversary. FOR 14 MINUTES. It's just amazing.

Bleeeehaaaarrr... I love you.

Everything and everyone and everything and everything and everything. They need to listen so much, so much, so much, so much. It'll mean so much to everyone, so much to everyone, ever, ever, ever, everything to everyone, so so much to everyone.

*snif* that's beautiful man.

I love you, man. I love you. I love you so much, man. Man, I love you. Man, man, I love man, man. I love you, man.

I can't stop laughing. I'm embarressed for the guy, just listening to this.

I'm sorry. After 6 months, I'd break up with the kid for making this for me. I'd be completely freaked out.
I'd also turn it off when it repeated itself after the first 30 seconds.

Anyone want a song and dance?

Haha, I'm just imagining it accompanied by a drummer and some standup bass.

Oh dear.

It feels mean laughing but its so ridiculous what else can you do? He sounds demented.

If the transcript of this was written down and then sung by Michael Jackson people would play it at weddings though.

Erm...

OK???

Booooooy, what a fucking loser!

Oh. Sweet. God.

Oh, the singing was impossible to sit though...

The whole experience reminds me of slowing down to check out a car accident. You have this awful feeling of watching and your whole body knows what the victim is going through but you can't help but look.

Pure undistiled horror

Geeee - no wonder she broke up with him if he gave that to her....

eww...?

C'mon guys, gimme a break....

I wonder how old this guy is.

I had to stop listening once he started singing.


[Edited on Sep 18, 2005 7:42PM]

You know you're listening to a teenager (or a woman) when you hear "six month anniversary."

God, this guy makes me want to shoot myself in the head, and I wasn't even dating him.

Poor, poor bastard.

"I don't ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever wanna lose you."

AUGH.

Wait, was he REALLY fucking high when he did this?