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Alyk

Alyk

Boston, MA
February 2005

MAY 18, 2006 08:13 AM

Sweaty trustafarian/hanger-on Brandon Davis gave the paparazzi a major money shot this week. Photographers followed Davis and the Hilton sisters around Hollywood as Davis unleashed a nasty torrent of euphemisms regarding Lindsay Lohan and her vagina. I have no idea how Davis would know that Lohan’s vag “smells like diarrhea,” but he states this and other graphic details with great confidence.

"Lindsay Lohan has got the stinkiest fuckin' orange sweaty vagina anyone has ever seen."

"[Lindsay's vagina] shits out freckles, it's orange and it smells like diarrhea."

"Her dad's hotter than her."

"[Lindsay's vagina] is like an orange tree."

"Lindsay Lohan has a fire crotch."

"She has freckles coming out of her vagina and her clitoris is 7 feet long."


Video

Along with being a Hilton sister lap dog, Davis’ impressive resume includes being the ex-boyfriend of Mischa Barton, and the grandson of billionaire oil tycoon Marvin Davis.


fictionalsounds

fictionalsounds

Alva, OK
April 2004

MAY 18, 2006 12:14 PM

i dunno if this says more about lindsey or more about mr. what's-his-name, but it's funnier than hell.

Kaziklu

Kaziklu

Canada
November 2004

MAY 18, 2006 12:14 PM

well at 7 feet it shouldn't be hard to get her off at least.

Roaring_Tulips

roaring_tulips

Jacksonville, FL
April 2006

MAY 18, 2006 12:20 PM

I don't even like Lindsay Lohan and I'm insulted by this. When is it right to go around telling reporters horribly graphic insults about someone else's privates? I don't care if she's fucked half of America and she's desperately trying to be someone she's not. That doesn't make it right.

ThisIsWhoWeAre

ThisIsWhoWeAre

Oakland, CA
July 2004

MAY 18, 2006 12:41 PM

Huh... She must've turned him down or something. What a tool. whatever

Dallas

Dallas

SUICIDEGIRL

Ontario, Canada

MAY 18, 2006 12:46 PM

hahaha.
PWND.

Sen

Sen

USA
January 2004

MAY 18, 2006 12:47 PM

I can't get the needed plugin to install in FireFox... I wanted to see how arrogant this guy was.

ShaggyVixe

ShaggyVixe

New Orleans, LA
November 2005

MAY 18, 2006 12:57 PM

This guy is a fucking moron. How is this news? Atypical neuvoriche douchebag and he and Skeletor...I mean Paris Hilton make the perfect combo of idiocy.

ShaggyVixe

ShaggyVixe

New Orleans, LA
November 2005

MAY 18, 2006 01:03 PM



Or


joker_

joker_

Minneapolis, MN
October 2005

MAY 18, 2006 01:03 PM

Obviously he has rabies.

In other news.

Lindsey Lohan has not slept with the half of America that I am in.

Additionally, I'm more than willing to take a look at her genitals and report back to the world in an honest fashion. I can be totally non-biased in my assesment, since I know very little about her and really have no opinion. However, I do like freckles.

MC_Dove

MC_Dove

Cincinnati, OH
November 2004

MAY 18, 2006 01:04 PM

ShaggyVixe said:
This guy is a fucking moron. How is this news?



do you click on the celeb articles specifically to ask this question? you seem like a masochist to me.

PointBlank

PointBlank

New York, NY
November 2004

MAY 18, 2006 01:08 PM

This guy is the same guy who said he wouldn't hang out with Paris Hilton because she was a racist.

FunkySkunk

FunkySkunk

Gainesville, FL
July 2004

MAY 18, 2006 01:11 PM

PointBlank said:
This guy is the same guy who said he wouldn't hang out with Paris Hilton because she was a racist.



Thats pretty much the reason why I don't hang out with Paris Hilton either...

_DictionaryGirl_

_DictionaryGirl_

NEWSWIRE

San Diego, CA

MAY 18, 2006 01:13 PM

What does that even mean to have a vagina like an orange tree? Does she eminate tasty pulpy drinkable treats that are Florida-orchard-fresh or something? Is she on tap? Can we bottle her for mass consumption?







(Because if we can, I call dibs on the patent.)

Alyk

Alyk

Boston, MA
February 2005

MAY 18, 2006 01:13 PM

PointBlank said:
This guy is the same guy who said he wouldn't hang out with Paris Hilton because she was a racist.


Yup, he's real stand up kind of guy.

Back in 2004, Davis, the grandson of oil billionaire Marvin Davis and former boyfriend of Mischa Barton, told the National Enquirer that he was no longer associating with Hilton because she is a racist.

"She was forever using the N-word," Davis said at the time. "I told her not to use it. It was offensive. But she just laughed. She is racist plus an idiot."

He added that Hilton, his friend since childhood, also "puts down Jews and other minorities, too, and I'm Jewish. I found it depressing."

What's even more depressing, however, is that not only has Davis apparently forgiven Hilton's supposedly racist ways - he has adopted them himself.

On the video of Davis and Hilton, taken while the duo were club-hopping in L.A., Davis hurls an ethnic invective at Lohan's ex-boyfriend, Wilmer Valderrama, asking, "Is he in a mariachi band?"


CheshireCat

CheshireCat

Los Angeles, CA
January 2004

MAY 18, 2006 01:13 PM

I cannot wait for fame or infamy so that I can talk shit about people I do not like in front of the camera;at least Lohan is a good actress and not a hanger on trust fun kid. I have nothing against Paris Hilton , I mean she is hot and I would do her but what exactly does she do that has any significance beyond her wealth status....?? I bet she is fun to party with if your in her loop but really she has no particular talent which makes her stick out beyond that;which may make her the perfekt sex symbol of the Bush zeitgeist era.

ShaggyVixe

ShaggyVixe

New Orleans, LA
November 2005

MAY 18, 2006 01:14 PM

Dove said:

ShaggyVixe said:
This guy is a fucking moron. How is this news?



do you click on the celeb articles specifically to ask this question? you seem like a masochist to me.



No I come here to hear your wit and witicism......

_DictionaryGirl_

_DictionaryGirl_

NEWSWIRE

San Diego, CA

MAY 18, 2006 01:17 PM

ShaggyVixe said:

Dove said:

ShaggyVixe said:
This guy is a fucking moron. How is this news?



do you click on the celeb articles specifically to ask this question? you seem like a masochist to me.



No I come here to hear your wit and witicism......


I'm afraid that the Wit and Witticism Division is located on floor 11, at the Redundant Department of Redundancy Bureau. Take a right turn off the elevator and then go right.

ReverendBenzo

ReverendBenzo

Savannah, GA
September 2003

MAY 18, 2006 01:19 PM

I don't know who Mischa Barton is.

ShaggyVixe

ShaggyVixe

New Orleans, LA
November 2005

MAY 18, 2006 01:20 PM

_DictionaryGirl_ said:

ShaggyVixe said:

Dove said:

ShaggyVixe said:
This guy is a fucking moron. How is this news?



do you click on the celeb articles specifically to ask this question? you seem like a masochist to me.



No I come here to hear your wit and witicism......


I'm afraid that the Wit and Witticism Division is located on floor 11, at the Redundant Department of Redundancy Bureau. Take a right turn off the elevator and then go right.



Curse you! Curse you to hell or The O.C whichever is closer....


MISCHA BARTON

JC_was_my_uncle

JC_was_my_uncle

I'm lost
November 2005

MAY 18, 2006 01:20 PM

Celebs? These are celeberities? Welcome home Satan.

Margot_Dent

Margot_Dent

Los Angeles, CA
February 2004

MAY 18, 2006 01:21 PM

Alyk said:

PointBlank said:
This guy is the same guy who said he wouldn't hang out with Paris Hilton because she was a racist.


Yup, he's real stand up kind of guy.

Back in 2004, Davis, the grandson of oil billionaire Marvin Davis and former boyfriend of Mischa Barton, told the National Enquirer that he was no longer associating with Hilton because she is a racist.

"She was forever using the N-word," Davis said at the time. "I told her not to use it. It was offensive. But she just laughed. She is racist plus an idiot."

He added that Hilton, his friend since childhood, also "puts down Jews and other minorities, too, and I'm Jewish. I found it depressing."

What's even more depressing, however, is that not only has Davis apparently forgiven Hilton's supposedly racist ways - he has adopted them himself.

On the video of Davis and Hilton, taken while the duo were club-hopping in L.A., Davis hurls an ethnic invective at Lohan's ex-boyfriend, Wilmer Valderrama, asking, "Is he in a mariachi band?"





he's a jew? ugh. what an embarassment to the tribe.

_DictionaryGirl_

_DictionaryGirl_

NEWSWIRE

San Diego, CA

MAY 18, 2006 01:28 PM

ShaggyVixe said:

_DictionaryGirl_ said:

ShaggyVixe said:

Dove said:

ShaggyVixe said:
This guy is a fucking moron. How is this news?



do you click on the celeb articles specifically to ask this question? you seem like a masochist to me.



No I come here to hear your wit and witicism......


I'm afraid that the Wit and Witticism Division is located on floor 11, at the Redundant Department of Redundancy Bureau. Take a right turn off the elevator and then go right.



Curse you! Curse you to hell or The O.C whichever is closer....


MISCHA BARTON


biggrin

But please no, not to The O.C.! blackeyed

ghastly1

ghastly1

Auburn, AL
September 2004

MAY 18, 2006 01:30 PM

Hilarious!!! You win!

_DictionaryGirl_ said:
What does that even mean to have a vagina like an orange tree? Does she eminate tasty pulpy drinkable treats that are Florida-orchard-fresh or something? Is she on tap? Can we bottle her for mass consumption?







(Because if we can, I call dibs on the patent.)

TheG

TheG

Somerville, MA
February 2004

MAY 18, 2006 01:48 PM

CheshireCat said:
what exactly does she do that has any significance beyond her wealth status....??



Absolutely nothing. She's a mean, spoiled, talentless hack and is about as close as anyone can get to being completely worthless.

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