NEWS: Jessica Simpson Feels Threatened by Younger "Star"

CELEB: Jessica Simpson Feels Threatened by Younger "Star"

Nick Lachey is gone but not forgotten for actress and pop star Jessica Simpson. Though the couple ended their career- saving marriage several months ago, Jessica hasn't quite gotten used to the idea of seeing her former husband with other women, namely "Laguna Beach" star Kristen Cavalieri. Nick and Kristen stopped dating three weeks ago, but Jessica still fumes at the thought of the tabloids printing Kristen's images next to her own, as if to compare the two.

So how does a young woman confront the physical manifestation of her fear of being replaced? For Jessica Simpson, revenge is a dish best served retarded.

No word yet on whether or not Jess has figured out you can't call a person just by dialing their first name into your phone. Meanwhile, Larry the 700 pound shut-in, who can be reached at 574-7836, reports that he is appreciative of the attention and mildly aroused by the sound of Jessica Simpson talking about food.

WHO FUCKING CARES?

*cough*

The one thing with celeb gossip is how the hell do you know if they are just making the entire story up.

Once again with feeling.....WHO FUCKING CARES ABOUT THIS SHIT? I pity any kid that pops outta Jessica Simpson! How would you feel being a newborn infant and realizing your shitfilled diaper is smarter than your mother?

This reminds me of the other day. I was in the supermarket pushing my cart to the register when I saw a copy of People Magazine on the rack ahead of me. I picked it up and started flipping through it. Every time I got two sentences into an article I would scream things like "OH MY GOD WHO FUCKING CARES FOR CHRIST'S SAKE" and "YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME ABOUT THIS BULLSHIT". It took me several hours to make it through the entire magazine, but at the end the entire store cheered and applauded, and I got to take my groceries home for free.

[Edited on Apr 12, 2006 by Jeff_Fries]

I want you inside me.

OMIGOD i had no idea I was posting in a J.Simp thread. Goddamnit.

Its so wrong but so very very right.

Oh, hey... from before...

i'm not feeling articulate enough right now to say what I mean, so I'll just say this. Jessica Simpson is fun to look at. Beyond that I have no fucking idea what she's all about and neither do you. Except for the sucky music.

I cant believe you remember me my heart is aflutter?

I do.

I'm not going to lie. I'd be all over those titties.

And I'd be on Howard Stern the next day giving excruciating detail.

Yes, but you would be in CW first, cause you're pimp like that

Well, natch.

If the 'lyks wanted to pony up I'd make it an exclusive.

So, basically, another nip photo on one of your threads? I can handle that. They are spectacular. Lucky for me they double as ninja stars.

By the way, I love that I can flag my own posts for being an asshole. Klassic.

*flag*

rats. foiled again.

[Edited on Apr 12, 2006 by lilyk]

*paid for by the committee to see lilyk's nipples on the interweb again*

This means I missed out the first time?

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

TheFuckOffKid said:

lilyk said:
*paid for by the committee to see lilyk's nipples on the interweb again*

This means I missed out the first time?

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

they were in limited release.

how did we get away from jessica simpson in all of this? o right, she's fucking boring...