Boards > Lifestyle > NEWS: IHateMen.Com

Beth_Gottfried

Cambridge, MA

March 2006

MAR 15, 2006 04:47 PM

For any gals out there whove ever reverted to googling your date prior to going out with him, there is now a site that goes the added step of letting you know if hes a cheater. A new controversial site, DontDateHimGirl.Com has spawned. The good news: it appeals to every womans worst paranoia about their spouse/date, all the while fronting the banner of sisterhood under the misguided premise that misery loves company, or rather bitter women unite. And for what better purpose than to dish about men that arent worthy of all the time these women are putting into writing about them.

I wish the irony didnt quite taste this rancid.

The bad news: DontDateHimGirl says it revolutionize(s) the way women date, but after looking at the site and reading the blog (which claims to be exclusively intended for bloggers to post pics of their cheating boytoys, but really reads more as a personal soapbox for the blogstress/webmistress plight against men), Im starting to question if this site isnt all a promotional vehicle for Tasha Cavelle Joseph, its founder.

Sample Blog Entry:

FUN, FUNKY DISEASES & FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS

It was thirty-six degrees in New York this morning. I am so grateful to be back in sunny Miami! I was in New York to make an appearance on the Today Show to talk about DontDateHimGirl.com. Well post a clip of my controversial appearance in the next few days for your viewing pleasure. The producer of the segment, a man, thought it would make for spirited debate to have another man named David Zinczenko, editor of Mens Health Magazine take part in the interview.

According to the producer, David was invited to give the story a male angle. Funny, I thought the story already had many male angles. My interviewer, Al Roker, is male; the producer of the segment is male, and there are hundreds of cheating males from around the world posted on this site. Why the producer thought we needed yet another male perspective in the segment is beyond me.

This was my second appearance on the show and perhaps if I appear on the show again, the producer and I could talk about it beforehand. Had we done that this time around, I would have asked him if he thought it made more sense to invite some of the males who were actually posted on the site to join me? He could have asked Halle Berrys former husband, Eric Benet to come on. The admitted cheater and alleged sex addict is posted on the site and would probably have been more than willing to make an appearance on the show (yes, we post all publicly admitted cheaters, such as Eric, Kobe Bryant and Jude Law on this site).

Or how about a few average American men on the show with me? There are over a thousand of them posted on the site at the moment. The producer could have even had some of the women who use the site and have posted cheaters appear on the show. But, alas, you never know what the people who create television that we watch are thinking these days. The poor producer was just thinking like a guy and created the segment like any guy would!

Despite the heavy male angle, taping the segment was great fun! I met Katie Couric, who worked in Miami at WTVJ from 1984 to 1986. She told me she thought of creating a site like this years ago to warn women about cads like the ones posted on DontDateHimGirl.com, but never pursued it. Great minds think alike, Katie!

David also said that in his opinion, considering there are 100 million women in the U.S. and only 1,000 men in the website at the time the show aired, that is a clear sign that women arent interested in this site. His reasoning was flawed and he acknowledged as much after the show when he told me he stood corrected because if Ive appeared on the Today Show twice in just a matter of months to talk about it, obviously someones interested in DontDateHimGirl.com. Actually, quite a few people are interested in this site, David. Let us tell you about them. Theres the over 250,000 registered female members who subscribe to our newsletter. Theres the over 580,000 people who hit the site each day and the many media people who write articles, run TV segments and talk about the site each day. Since the sites been up for less than six months, wed say its just a mere matter of months before there over hundreds of thousands of men in our global cheaters database!

If DontDateHimGirl.Com isnt your bag, theres always TrueDater.Com which helps out the evil male.

zenFish

Vancouver, BC

August 2004

MAR 15, 2006 04:56 PM

funny... wonder what would happen if a group of men made a site like this to blast women.

(also manhanter.com goes to some movie site link)

also the above posting from her sounds rather catty...

but hey, if you follow the simple line "hell hath no fury like woman scorned" you'll do (sortof) fine in the dating world.

LiquidYogi

Claremont, CA

September 2003

MAR 15, 2006 05:05 PM

Well I guess if women would date nice guys instead of jerks maybe I'd get a date once in awhile. Sadly that usually doesn't happen and instead nice guys get to be the "Gay Friends" of stupid girls. Meh

lafurdefa

Los Angeles, CA

March 2006

MAR 15, 2006 05:19 PM

i love how manhater.com takes me to a site for dvds and home theater! damn men!

groove

Chicago, IL

OLD SKOOL

MAR 15, 2006 05:47 PM

The site is *begging* for a lawsuit. Hello?? Defamation and libel, anyone? Yikes.

LinkIsMyHero

USA

February 2005

MAR 15, 2006 05:51 PM

I stopped reading when she called guys "males".

ICY

Ireland

March 2005

MAR 15, 2006 05:55 PM

Wow, so there exists a site where people have their pictures and personal details posted, then are derided, labeled as scum and are maligned all without comeback, recourse or their own say in the matter?

What's to stop someone bitter from posting anyone they dont like on the site? Someone who might have dumped them?
Someone who didn't return some affection.

Misandry has a new champion it seems.

ICY

Ireland

March 2005

MAR 15, 2006 05:58 PM

Oh and it seems ManHaters.com has been renamed to WomanSavers.com

And it sounds like an extortion racket to be honest.

How do I delete a posting?

If your profile is posted and you feel it is an untrue opinion, you may do the following: 1. Post a rebuttal. Manhaters.com does not guaranty, verify, or edit surveys unless they contain personally identifying information. (The rebuttal method is frequently utilized by magazines and/or newspapers accussed of libel or printing a mistake). 2. Click "Rate-A-Guy" on the menu bar above and then "Delete a Name from the Database." The fee is US$25.00, a portion of which is donated donated to a fleeing women and children's abuse shelter.

So basically you have to pay them to have an entry removed!?!
Or you can post "I wasn't me" and have whatever malignant thing that's said about you still remain on the site?!

Fucking hell.

papawheelie

Fisty, KY

February 2003

MAR 15, 2006 06:00 PM

rollerdisco said:
I stopped reading when she called guys "males".

word.

FridgeMagnet

Chicago, IL

November 2004

MAR 15, 2006 06:12 PM

boooorrrrrrrrrrring.

DeadBilly

Burnt Cabins, PA

February 2004

MAR 15, 2006 06:18 PM

ICY said:
What's to stop someone bitter from posting anyone they dont like on the site? Someone who might have dumped them?
Someone who didn't return some affection.

From my brief browsing (not brief enough), those seem to be the only kind of posts there.

Cigarette

Cleveland, OH

April 2004

MAR 15, 2006 06:22 PM

ICY said:
Wow, so there exists a site where people have their pictures and personal details posted, then are derided, labeled as scum and are maligned all without comeback, recourse or their own say in the matter?

Sounds like the Celeb Worship group.

ardour

Ottawa, ON

March 2006

MAR 15, 2006 06:25 PM

I really find it silly when something is made gender specific when it really isn't.

DeadBilly

Burnt Cabins, PA

February 2004

MAR 15, 2006 06:38 PM

ardour said:
I really find it silly when something is made gender specific when it really isn't.

Agreed. It only helps to further both misogyny and misandry by creating a "girls against boys" atmosphere.

Cairo

SUICIDEGIRL

Maryland, USA

MAR 15, 2006 06:44 PM

LiquidYogi said:
Well I guess if women would date nice guys instead of jerks maybe I'd get a date once in awhile. Sadly that usually doesn't happen and instead nice guys get to be the "Gay Friends" of stupid girls. Meh

I guess you've never heard of this site then.

All too often we hear self-professed "Nice Guys" complaining about why they can't get a date, and whining that women just want to date jerks, etc. etc. The truth of the matter is that there are genuinely caring, compassionate, decent, fun guys out there who have NO TROUBLE meeting people, getting dates, and having relationships.

Unfortunately, many of the guys who DO have trouble, insist on laying blame and asserting that women don't want them because they are too "Nice". These people who call themselves "Nice Guys" can't see that THEIR OWN behavior is the problem. Whether it is targetting women who are troubled to begin with, or acting in a manipulative, patronizing or obsequious fashion, these guys sabotage themselves and blame others for their misfortunes.

bearofbears

Denver, CO

January 2006

MAR 15, 2006 06:50 PM

I went to the site. I am all for looking up a date on the registered sex offender website, but the information on this site is just silly.

Roethke

SUICIDEGIRL

California, USA

MAR 15, 2006 07:01 PM

Cairo said:

LiquidYogi said:
Well I guess if women would date nice guys instead of jerks maybe I'd get a date once in awhile. Sadly that usually doesn't happen and instead nice guys get to be the "Gay Friends" of stupid girls. Meh

I guess you've never heard of this site then.

All too often we hear self-professed "Nice Guys" complaining about why they can't get a date, and whining that women just want to date jerks, etc. etc. The truth of the matter is that there are genuinely caring, compassionate, decent, fun guys out there who have NO TROUBLE meeting people, getting dates, and having relationships.

Unfortunately, many of the guys who DO have trouble, insist on laying blame and asserting that women don't want them because they are too "Nice". These people who call themselves "Nice Guys" can't see that THEIR OWN behavior is the problem. Whether it is targetting women who are troubled to begin with, or acting in a manipulative, patronizing or obsequious fashion, these guys sabotage themselves and blame others for their misfortunes.

Hehe. I was totally going to bring this to the attention of the above alleged nice guy, but you beat me to it.

Sites like dontdatehimgirl.com are just places for bitter women to moan about their mistreatment. I've had boys cheat on me, and then go on to have great relationships with other girls. It never changed my life enough to want to post bile about my ex on the internet.

Personally, I think it takes one wicked paranoid person to rely on sites like this for background checks, but it works both ways. If the woman who you wanted to go out with declines because she read about you on this site, she probably wasn't a good idea after all. This isn't a site for sexual offenders, but a site for unsubstantiated gossip.

[Edited on Mar 15, 2006 by Roethke]

Cairo

SUICIDEGIRL

Maryland, USA

MAR 15, 2006 07:04 PM

Roethke said:

Cairo said:

LiquidYogi said:
Well I guess if women would date nice guys instead of jerks maybe I'd get a date once in awhile. Sadly that usually doesn't happen and instead nice guys get to be the "Gay Friends" of stupid girls. Meh

I guess you've never heard of this site then.

All too often we hear self-professed "Nice Guys" complaining about why they can't get a date, and whining that women just want to date jerks, etc. etc. The truth of the matter is that there are genuinely caring, compassionate, decent, fun guys out there who have NO TROUBLE meeting people, getting dates, and having relationships.

Unfortunately, many of the guys who DO have trouble, insist on laying blame and asserting that women don't want them because they are too "Nice". These people who call themselves "Nice Guys" can't see that THEIR OWN behavior is the problem. Whether it is targetting women who are troubled to begin with, or acting in a manipulative, patronizing or obsequious fashion, these guys sabotage themselves and blame others for their misfortunes.

Hehe. I was totally going to bring this to the attention of the above alleged nice guy, but you beat me to it.

Great minds think alike.

ought

USA

September 2004

MAR 15, 2006 07:07 PM

Cairo said:

LiquidYogi said:
Well I guess if women would date nice guys instead of jerks maybe I'd get a date once in awhile. Sadly that usually doesn't happen and instead nice guys get to be the "Gay Friends" of stupid girls. Meh

I guess you've never heard of this site then.

This site is AWESOME!!!!
Needed to be said so badly.

bean

STAFF

Los Angeles, CA

MAR 15, 2006 07:19 PM

Roethke said:

Cairo said:

LiquidYogi said:
Well I guess if women would date nice guys instead of jerks maybe I'd get a date once in awhile. Sadly that usually doesn't happen and instead nice guys get to be the "Gay Friends" of stupid girls. Meh

I guess you've never heard of this site then.

All too often we hear self-professed "Nice Guys" complaining about why they can't get a date, and whining that women just want to date jerks, etc. etc. The truth of the matter is that there are genuinely caring, compassionate, decent, fun guys out there who have NO TROUBLE meeting people, getting dates, and having relationships.

Unfortunately, many of the guys who DO have trouble, insist on laying blame and asserting that women don't want them because they are too "Nice". These people who call themselves "Nice Guys" can't see that THEIR OWN behavior is the problem. Whether it is targetting women who are troubled to begin with, or acting in a manipulative, patronizing or obsequious fashion, these guys sabotage themselves and blame others for their misfortunes.

Hehe. I was totally going to bring this to the attention of the above alleged nice guy, but you beat me to it.

Haha...same here, but I was going to find the thread here where it was posted a couple years back.

zenFish

Vancouver, BC

August 2004

MAR 15, 2006 07:25 PM

bean said:

Roethke said:

Cairo said:

LiquidYogi said:
Well I guess if women would date nice guys instead of jerks maybe I'd get a date once in awhile. Sadly that usually doesn't happen and instead nice guys get to be the "Gay Friends" of stupid girls. Meh

I guess you've never heard of this site then.

All too often we hear self-professed "Nice Guys" complaining about why they can't get a date, and whining that women just want to date jerks, etc. etc. The truth of the matter is that there are genuinely caring, compassionate, decent, fun guys out there who have NO TROUBLE meeting people, getting dates, and having relationships.

Unfortunately, many of the guys who DO have trouble, insist on laying blame and asserting that women don't want them because they are too "Nice". These people who call themselves "Nice Guys" can't see that THEIR OWN behavior is the problem. Whether it is targetting women who are troubled to begin with, or acting in a manipulative, patronizing or obsequious fashion, these guys sabotage themselves and blame others for their misfortunes.

Hehe. I was totally going to bring this to the attention of the above alleged nice guy, but you beat me to it.

Haha...same here, but I was going to find the thread here where it was posted a couple years back.

Read that soon after I joined up in 2004 to sg... have to say at that point in time it was a good help to for me to get my head on straight and put me in a better mindset. *nod*

hadees

Austin, TX

December 2003

MAR 15, 2006 07:30 PM

I almost wish I was on those sites because I don't think I would want to date any girls who use them.

blahblahblahstup

Philadelphia, PA

August 2005

MAR 15, 2006 07:45 PM

hadees said:
I almost wish I was on those sites because I don't think I would want to date any girls who use them.

That's a damn good idea!!!
Maybe I can post myself!......hmmmm....
Really though, this is the first time I've ever heard of anyone doing a background on a potential date. Is really this a common thing for women to do?
It's scary that people feel that they have to do things like this...I guess it makes sense...
I know there are scary guys out there....
Humanity is the devil. I'm sure of it.

P.S. the culture editor is a babe!!
ugh, i'm such a "male."
[Edited on Mar 15, 2006 by blahblahstupid]

[Edited on Mar 15, 2006 by blahblahstupid]

zobop_

Japan

August 2004

MAR 15, 2006 07:55 PM

Roethke said:

Sites like dontdatehimgirl.com are just places for bitter women to moan about their mistreatment. I've had boys cheat on me, and then go on to have great relationships with other girls. It never changed my life enough to want to post bile about my ex on the internet.

Personally, I think it takes one wicked paranoid person to rely on sites like this for background checks, but it works both ways. If the woman who you wanted to go out with declines because she read about you on this site, she probably wasn't a good idea after all. This isn't a site for sexual offenders, but a site for unsubstantiated gossip.

[Edited on Mar 15, 2006 by Roethke]

As an ex-nice guy (I realized I am indeed a jerk and need someone pliable enough to care about me ) and one who's been on both ends of manipulative relationships, I reckon perhaps this site's not such a bad idea after all. Any guy who's done some of the nasty but survivable shit mentioned (cheating, being an overall prick, etc.), and I figure many of us have, might get posted there by a girl we wronged who needs to publicly humiliate us in front of total strangers online in order get over the pain (as opposed to heal herself without posting, maybe through the normal talking to her friends who may get us back, channeling it into writing, or some other, hopefully more positively transformative vein.) Then, as Roethke said, other guys won't go for said girl, and said girl will become lonlier, which will corraborate her negative feelings towards the Y chromosomed. Said guy will then be able to see said shit and, if he has any heart or balls at all, come to terms with it and, if not, know how to improve his cover. And the cycle continues...

That said, there oughta be places for people, of whatever genders and sexualities, to warn others of truly, possibly criminally, nasty people they've had the misfortune of inviting into their lives. Just wish sites like this had a bit more perspective rather than just public bile-venting that I'd have to pay $25 to get deleted. Though, is a forced contribution to battered women's shelters really so bad?

[Edited on Mar 16, 2006 12:56PM]

[Edited on Mar 16, 2006 12:58PM]

Roethke

SUICIDEGIRL

California, USA

MAR 15, 2006 08:19 PM

blahblahstupid said:

hadees said:
I almost wish I was on those sites because I don't think I would want to date any girls who use them.

That's a damn good idea!!!
Maybe I can post myself!......hmmmm....
Really though, this is the first time I've ever heard of anyone doing a background on a potential date. Is really this a common thing for women to do?
It's scary that people feel that they have to do things like this...I guess it makes sense...
I know there are scary guys out there....
Humanity is the devil. I'm sure of it.

P.S. the culture editor is a babe!!
ugh, i'm such a "male."
[Edited on Mar 15, 2006 by blahblahstupid]

[Edited on Mar 15, 2006 by blahblahstupid]

I have two friends who went on dates with men who were later arrested for rape, and one for rape and kidnapping.

I've never gone on a date with a stranger, so I've never needed to do a background check, but I suppose that it isn't a bad idea if you've never met the person before to do a google of their name. Hell, I do that with my professors. But, this site just doesn't strike me as a reliable background check. Someone stepping out a couple times is not on par with forcible rape.

BOARDS:

TOPICS:

Cambridge, MA

March 2006

MAR 15, 2006 04:47 PM

Vancouver, BC

August 2004

MAR 15, 2006 04:56 PM

Claremont, CA

September 2003

MAR 15, 2006 05:05 PM

lafurdefa

Los Angeles, CA

March 2006

MAR 15, 2006 05:19 PM

Chicago, IL

OLD SKOOL

MAR 15, 2006 05:47 PM

LinkIsMyHero

USA

February 2005

MAR 15, 2006 05:51 PM

ICY

Ireland

March 2005

MAR 15, 2006 05:55 PM

ICY

Ireland

March 2005

MAR 15, 2006 05:58 PM

Fisty, KY

February 2003

MAR 15, 2006 06:00 PM

Chicago, IL

November 2004

MAR 15, 2006 06:12 PM

Burnt Cabins, PA

February 2004

MAR 15, 2006 06:18 PM

Cleveland, OH

April 2004

MAR 15, 2006 06:22 PM

Ottawa, ON

March 2006

MAR 15, 2006 06:25 PM

Burnt Cabins, PA

February 2004

MAR 15, 2006 06:38 PM

SUICIDEGIRL

Maryland, USA

MAR 15, 2006 06:44 PM

Denver, CO

January 2006

MAR 15, 2006 06:50 PM

SUICIDEGIRL

California, USA

MAR 15, 2006 07:01 PM

SUICIDEGIRL

Maryland, USA

MAR 15, 2006 07:04 PM

USA

September 2004

MAR 15, 2006 07:07 PM

STAFF

Los Angeles, CA

MAR 15, 2006 07:19 PM

Vancouver, BC

August 2004

MAR 15, 2006 07:25 PM

Austin, TX

December 2003

MAR 15, 2006 07:30 PM

Philadelphia, PA

August 2005

MAR 15, 2006 07:45 PM

Japan

August 2004

MAR 15, 2006 07:55 PM

SUICIDEGIRL

California, USA