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ZombieStomp

ZombieStomp

Carrboro, NC
July 2005

OCT 31, 2005 12:10 AM

I was riding my bicycle home from my favourite underground billiards pub, Hell, down Rosemary street, past the crack neighbourhood, looking straight ahead, when I hear a female voice to my right say "hey, man", and I thought it was part of a conversation with someone other than myself, so I continue cycling, and few seconds later, the same voice says "don't say shit then", and realizing it was all to me, I say loudly, "SHIT!"
Any crack neighbourhood stories are welcomed with open ears.

Oracle

Oracle

Courtenay, BC
September 2003

OCT 31, 2005 12:19 AM

underground billiards pub? billiard pubs are outlawed there?

Farhaad

Farhaad

Arcadia, CA
February 2005

OCT 31, 2005 12:20 AM

I thought crack was extinct.

Oracle

Oracle

Courtenay, BC
September 2003

OCT 31, 2005 12:25 AM

Starhaad said:
I thought crack was extinct.


thanks to spakle its getting there.

JohNNY_417

JohNNY_417

Bellingham, WA
May 2005

OCT 31, 2005 12:34 AM

Most of the crackheads from mah neck of the woods have switched to Meth... Cheaper, easier to make since it doesn't require an illegal drug (not the assembly itself)... I remember trying to find a buyer in my younger and more vulnerable years and having my car attacked with a wiffle bat by some methed out old bitch wearing dirty sweats, a tank top, and clearly lacked a bra... Apparently she owned her neighbors driveway as well as her own... I have never been so amused and horrified at the same time... She also vocalized during her battle with my vehicle that mexicans didn't belong in her neighbordhood... I'm not, but meh, I guess I look hispanic...

Ramona

Ramona

SUICIDEGIRL

California, USA

OCT 31, 2005 12:39 AM

oh oh! there's crackhead apartments across the street from my house! the rest of the neighborhood is really nice. once some lady spent most of a day yelling at passersby from her window until the cops showed up and dragged her off to the psych ward. that was fun...

YourCoffinOrMine

YourCoffinOrMine

I'm lost
July 2003

OCT 31, 2005 12:53 AM

Some lady came into my shop and wanted me to pierce her navel with this crappy ass piece of jewelry that wasn't right for piercing. I wouldn't so she was yelling saying I wouldn't because we only wanted her to buy ours. And that she only had 5 dollars. I had to explain to her why her jewelry was crap......she was hysterical for like an hour...then left. surreal




...and yes she was on crack at the time!

[Edited on Oct 31, 2005 by YourCoffinOrMine]

catatac

catatac

San Diego, CA
June 2005

OCT 31, 2005 01:02 AM

I dated a crackhead once. He'd skulk around the apartment and keep me up all night asking paranoid stupid questions. He also nailed my baby blankies over the windows. I should have killed him for that.

Yeah. It wasn't my brightest idea. Though to my credit, I wasn't keenly aware he was a crackhead when I met him.

I hate crackheads.



[Edited on Oct 31, 2005 by bloomews]

crackedhead

crackedhead

San Jose, CA
September 2004

OCT 31, 2005 01:27 AM

Mmmm...crack.

ZombieStomp

ZombieStomp

Carrboro, NC
July 2005

OCT 31, 2005 01:47 AM

PhantomOracle said:
underground billiards pub? billiard pubs are outlawed there?



No, it's literally under the ground, in a basement below a live music venue called The Wetlands, which is below a second story bar called Bub O'Malley's. And it's called Hell. I'm originally from a town in michigan called Hell, too, from birth to age 5 I lived there. Billiards pubs aren't outlawed here in Chapel Hill, NC, but there are few good ones. I favor the ones with coin-op tables, because it allows people to play strangers by calling the winner of a game by placing a quarter on the table, whereas with rented tables, you must play the same schmuck over and over until you turn in the balls. Hell has free pool on sundays, and 22 oz. buds are $3 on sun. as well, this and the fact that it's mostly the cool regulars there (i.e. my friends) , makes sunday the best day to go there, even if only for an hour or two after work. So to recap, no, billiards pubs are NOT outlawed here.

jason

jason

USA
August 2002

OCT 31, 2005 02:00 AM

"yo. YO! lemme see your bike. thats a nice bike. lemme check it out. what, you dont trust me? FUCK YOU, motherfucker!" (pedals faster).

or...

"hey man my car over there (points at like four different cars) just ran out of gas..."

or...

(bang bang bang) hi im your upstairs neighbor. im really sick. i have AIDS and i need to take a cab up to the hospital. do you think you could help me out with a twenty?

i think the last guy was actually a heroin addict who didnt live in my building at all but was probably only lying about that and the taking a cab part.

Jeff_Fries

Jeff_Fries

Humptulips, WA
September 2003

OCT 31, 2005 02:05 AM

I sold phones to three crackheads once. One of them paid with wadded money from her bra.

ZombieStomp

ZombieStomp

Carrboro, NC
July 2005

OCT 31, 2005 02:15 AM

Jeff_Fries said:
I sold phones to three crackheads once. One of them paid with wadded money from her bra.


[dave chapelle] *sniff* ooohhh... titty residue....
I once sold frozen yogurt to an attractive college lass who pulled money from her bra. She then said, I assume in response to the look in my eyes, the above opening statement. This has nothing to do with crackheads though, but it's my thread and I'll get sidetracked if I want to. And so will the rest of you.

FrankMask

FrankMask

Saint Paul, MN
June 2003

OCT 31, 2005 11:58 AM

So how do you get rid of crackheads? I haven't seen the neighborhood Cracked Jack in a while but we still get the odd twitchy guy here and I'm never quite surehow to deal with them. Althougt baseball bat usually seems like a tempting, if impracticle, option.

unravled

unravled

Portland, OR
August 2003

OCT 31, 2005 12:09 PM

Once, all the light bulbs disappeared in my house. Yeah, that boyfriend and I broke up, like, a week later.

life_returns

life_returns

Oakland, CA
April 2003

OCT 31, 2005 12:10 PM

I saw a crackhead stick-fight on west grand the other day. One of them started to run away, so then it turned into crackhead racing. The one running ran inside the st.vincent de paul soup kitchen , then the light turned green so we left. FIN.

Ryan_Dipietro

Ryan_Dipietro

Naples, FL
April 2004

OCT 31, 2005 12:26 PM

ZombieStomp said:

Jeff_Fries said:
I sold phones to three crackheads once. One of them paid with wadded money from her bra.


[dave chapelle] *sniff* ooohhh... titty residue....
I once sold frozen yogurt to an attractive college lass who pulled money from her bra. She then said, I assume in response to the look in my eyes, the above opening statement. This has nothing to do with crackheads though, but it's my thread and I'll get sidetracked if I want to. And so will the rest of you.



Do the ice cream salesmen make fun of the frozen yogurt salesmen for being gayer?

Kittie

Kittie

Stow, OH
August 2003

OCT 31, 2005 12:28 PM

ZombieStomp said:

Jeff_Fries said:
I sold phones to three crackheads once. One of them paid with wadded money from her bra.


[dave chapelle] *sniff* ooohhh... titty residue....
I once sold frozen yogurt to an attractive college lass who pulled money from her bra. She then said, I assume in response to the look in my eyes, the above opening statement. This has nothing to do with crackheads though, but it's my thread and I'll get sidetracked if I want to. And so will the rest of you.


i find this a perfectly acceptable way to carry money when you don't have pockets or a purse. it's more comfortable and less gross than using your shoe.

FridgeMagnet

FridgeMagnet

Chicago, IL
November 2004

OCT 31, 2005 12:35 PM

unravled said:
Once, all the light bulbs disappeared in my house. Yeah, that boyfriend and I broke up, like, a week later.



Hold up. You're telling me some dude sold his lightbulbs for crack?? That's the funniest drug related thing I've ever heard.

Shal

Shal

Los Angeles, CA
October 2002

OCT 31, 2005 12:46 PM

FridgeLoomis said:

unravled said:
Once, all the light bulbs disappeared in my house. Yeah, that boyfriend and I broke up, like, a week later.



Hold up. You're telling me some dude sold his lightbulbs for crack?? That's the funniest drug related thing I've ever heard.



You can make crack or meth pipes out of lightbulbs. Pretty sure the gentleman in question wasn't selling the lightbulbs so much as using them for other purposes.

[Edited on Oct 31, 2005 by Shalome]

The_Reverend

The_Reverend

United Kingdom
September 2004

OCT 31, 2005 12:48 PM

Me and my friends were mugged of our 'stuff' one night, by a large gang of 'yoot', loitering by the offie and the kebab shop over the road from my mate jeff's...

...so we marched to his house, rang up our 'friend' I__y, and said, 'We've just been done over by your cousins!'

We had everything delivered back by a very apologetic lad, about twenty minutes later.

smile

unravled

unravled

Portland, OR
August 2003

OCT 31, 2005 12:53 PM

FridgeLoomis said:

unravled said:
Once, all the light bulbs disappeared in my house. Yeah, that boyfriend and I broke up, like, a week later.



Hold up. You're telling me some dude sold his lightbulbs for crack?? That's the funniest drug related thing I've ever heard.


Wait! I forgot about the best crack story ever!

I had a friend who worked night shifts at Food-4-Less, which is the grocery store they build in the crackwhore infested neighborhoods. A woman came up and put her stuff on the conveyor belt. He rang it up and gave her the total. She, twitching all the while, reached up under her skirt, pulled the money out of her panties, and threw it on the conveyor belt, where, before picking it up, my friend realizes it's bloody.

EndedBen

EndedBen

Grand Rapids, MI
August 2004

OCT 31, 2005 12:57 PM

Favourite? Neighbourhood? Pub? The?

unravled

unravled

Portland, OR
August 2003

OCT 31, 2005 01:00 PM

SuperDEADtendo said:
Favourite? Neighbourhood? Pub? The?


He says his hometown is Hell. Maybe they teach the queen's English there.

FridgeMagnet

FridgeMagnet

Chicago, IL
November 2004

OCT 31, 2005 01:02 PM

This isn't a crack neighborhood story, but once, I was in a store around back to school time. This little kid comes running up to his mother with a Trapper Keeper and he's all excited and yelling, "Mommy Mommy buy me this!!" and she backhanded him and said, "Shut up before I buy yo' ass."

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