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9/30/05

Wireless laptop INTRANETTZ

9/30/05

Steve-O Dee in Mr.Big commercial?

9/30/05

New Group for BattleStar Galactica Fans

9/30/05

NEWS: Priest Pulled for Opposing Anti-Gay Marriage Amendment

9/30/05

What should I get? iBook v. PowerBook [2]

9/30/05

Handwriting and the Women That Love It

9/30/05

i have a new group!!!!!!!

9/30/05

UK TV Comedy is still the best [3]

9/30/05

NEWS: Love is All You Need

9/29/05

Bring on the hurricanes!

9/29/05

Is this a series or something???

9/29/05

Goth culture documentary - Bay Area folk

9/29/05

Daniel Robert Epstein: Michael McKean

9/29/05

9/29/05

NEWS: Hurricane Johnson

9/29/05

I'm such a nerd: MGS4: Guns of the Patriots

I_Poop_Too_Much

9/29/05

NEWS: New Motorsport Series to Represent 5.2 Billion People

9/29/05

NEWS: Sex and Drugs are Depressing

9/29/05

Daniel Robert Epstein: Jonathan Glazer - Director's Label DVD

9/29/05

NEWS: Religion Contributes to Society's Ills [2]

9/29/05

Green Street anybody?

9/28/05

Warning Signs That Make You Weep for the Future

9/28/05

Best Furniture Store Ever

9/28/05

Steve O on the Adam Carolla show [2]

9/28/05

Galactica Group?

9/28/05

Anyone able to help me with this?

9/28/05

New Wes Anderson group

9/28/05

"Spider-Man III" villains announced. [2]

9/28/05

NEWS: Shanghai to be World's Biggest Singles Bar

9/28/05

9/28/05

pat o'brien, sex addled drug addict

9/28/05

Anybody out there looking for a Sidekick II Cell?

9/28/05

NEWS: The Power of Faith...and Crank

9/28/05

Serenity opens Friday

9/28/05

Car wreck advice.

9/28/05

Wife Swap...Which one of you is it?

9/28/05

Girls: How Do I Help Her?

9/28/05

NEWS: U.S. Military Loses Bad Austin Powers Joke in Hurricane's Wake [2]

9/28/05

Howling II:Your Sister is a Werewolf-Movie Review

9/28/05

Pumpkinhead II: Blood Wings (Movie Review)

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NEWS: U.S. Military Loses Bad Austin Powers Joke in Hurricane's Wake

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Ember

SUICIDEGIRL

Nevada, USA

SEP 27, 2005 09:56 AM

So our goverment thinks it's okay for dolphins to be exploited and used for military purposes but it's not okay for young women to express themselves in whatever manner they choose....hmmm....

damned_out_loud

Cambridge, ON

October 2004

SEP 27, 2005 10:40 AM

Sounds like a movie starring Ice Cube.

poptard

United Kingdom

November 2003

SEP 27, 2005 10:46 AM

this is all i can think of

dirrty perv dolphins

ThisIsWhoWeAre

Oakland, CA

July 2004

SEP 27, 2005 12:05 PM

Ember said:
So our goverment thinks it's okay for dolphins to be exploited and used for military purposes but it's not okay for young women to express themselves in whatever manner they choose....hmmm....

Well... yeah, but they're male dolphins, so it's okay.

Oh! and STRAIGHT male dolphins, don't forget that.

Lemonkid

Canada

May 2003

SEP 28, 2005 07:02 AM

ThisIsWhoWeAre said:

Ember said:
So our goverment thinks it's okay for dolphins to be exploited and used for military purposes but it's not okay for young women to express themselves in whatever manner they choose....hmmm....

Well... yeah, but they're male dolphins, so it's okay.

Oh! and STRAIGHT male dolphins, don't forget that.

That sleek, stylish, hairless form?

If they are straight, and I mean IF.. they've definitely been on Queer Eye for the Straight Dolphin.

malmuud

Newark, DE

July 2003

SEP 28, 2005 07:26 AM

"Classified," more like "ASSified" plan. Why classify it? No one in their right mind would believe it anyway. Amazing how fast our civilization fell from using the nuclear bomb, to training dolphins to use poison-dart guns.

MistahPrince

Chicago, IL

February 2005

SEP 28, 2005 07:31 AM

You know, the only thing that really saddens me about all this is that the Naval officers will be the last killed when the Dolphins take over. Because they helped.

And yeah, this is the greatest Onion article, ever.

freshprncebelair

Ellicott City, MD

June 2004

SEP 28, 2005 07:41 AM

malmuud said:
"Classified," more like "ASSified" plan. Why classify it? No one in their right mind would believe it anyway. Amazing how fast our civilization fell from using the nuclear bomb, to training dolphins to use poison-dart guns.

It's because Dolphins were a large part of our Submarine warfare efforts. Classifying what they do, how many of them there are, etc helps prevent people from trumping the power of these killer dolphins

Gwendolyn

SUICIDEGIRL

Indiana, USA

SEP 28, 2005 12:56 PM

I really wanted to believe this story, but I have to believe Snopes instead.

It's not true.

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