Lifestyle

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9/16/05

NEWS: Aw Rats! The Plague!

9/16/05

NEWS: Alaska Kills Walrus Cam While Hunters Kill Walruses

9/16/05

NEWS: m0D3rN ScR4bBL3

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Toronto - Cronenberg Locations

thebacchanalian

9/16/05

New harry potter trailer yeah or neah..

9/16/05

Judge Roberts on Logan VS. Wayne

9/15/05

Knowledge is VOMMITING in my Brain [5]

9/15/05

NEWS: Everyone Loves Bruce Lee [3]

9/15/05

breakfast at tiffany's

9/15/05

Pictures of Katrina

9/15/05

NEWS: Pope Blows Cover on ExorCon 2k5

9/15/05

9/15/05

I need a piss quick.....

9/15/05

Why is "seven" so damn perfect? [2]

9/15/05

Is this racist? [4]

9/15/05

The Transporter 2 [2]

9/15/05

EBay and Paypal

9/15/05

NEWS: Protest Planned Parenthood! [2]

9/15/05

pics that melt your heart

9/15/05

Another nocturnal thread!

9/15/05

NEWS: Move to NYC, Get Laid More [2]

9/15/05

NEWS: Demon Twins Name Their Unholy Successors [2]

9/15/05

9/15/05

Losing a loved pet [2]

9/14/05

A Word About Rotisserie Chicken

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My City After Katrina

9/14/05

NEWS: Fucked Up Parents Arrested for Locking 11 Kids in Cages [2]

9/14/05

9/14/05

JUXTAPOZ MAGAZINE

9/14/05

Question for those with pierced tongues. [2]

9/14/05

Fucked up dreams, what's your worst?

9/14/05

Make a story about someone elses username [2]

9/14/05

NEWS: The Perfect Survey for Any of You Men [2]

9/14/05

Male Fashion Pet Peeves/Faux Pas'

9/14/05

Dorks: Hottest FF Babe? [3]

9/14/05

I'm gunna eat ur fishay tongue.

9/14/05

Ghosts, Spirits and the supernatural what have you seen. [2]

9/14/05

England win the ashes

9/14/05

The one and only, Kalidoom. [7]

9/14/05

Daniel Robert Epstein: Lord of War director Andrew Niccol

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NEWS: The Perfect Survey for Any of You Men

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Shal

Los Angeles, CA

October 2002

SEP 01, 2005 01:56 PM

CULTURE: The Perfect Survey for Any of You Men

Hey, all you people with penises. I'm sure you love to yank your own chain as much as anyone else, but now you can put your wanking habit to good use and get free stuff.

Lovehoney.co.uk, an online sexual aid shop, would like to know just how long it takes you to rub one out while using a free sample of their Stroke 29 "masturbation cream." You sign up, they send you free samples, you jerk off, and you fill out a short survey telling them exactly how many strokes it took you to get to your very own happy ending.

The makers of Stroke 29 claim it's the masturbation cream that lasts longer than you do -- but does it really? Can you last longer (MUCH) longer than 29 strokes or will you pop your peanuts before you even reach double digits?

We'll send you a free sachet of Stroke 29 masturbation cream (RRP £1.49 -- aren't we generous?!) and in return all we ask is that you count the strokes as you knock one out and then return to this page to fill in the survey.

So, guys, what have you got to lose? Go participate in some valuable scientific research!

Subrosa

San Francisco, CA

July 2004

SEP 01, 2005 01:58 PM

So wait, I've got to COUNT while jacking off? I was told there would be no math.

MadScience_7

Golden, CO

June 2004

SEP 01, 2005 02:05 PM

I have pretty good endurance without that stuff. If it really works as advertised, I dont think I can count that high.

StarBelliedBoy

Philadelphia, PA

December 2003

SEP 01, 2005 02:12 PM

But... Town and County? Translate that to American! I want my J O Cream!

Telltale

USA

May 2004

SEP 01, 2005 02:15 PM

haha, I'll have to get one of those thumb counter things

Shal

Los Angeles, CA

October 2002

SEP 01, 2005 02:19 PM

MadScience_7 said:
I have pretty good endurance without that stuff. If it really works as advertised, I dont think I can count that high.

It's not supposed to prolong masturbation. THe opposite, in fact. The name "Stroke 29" means that the 29th stroke should be the last one...

FridgeMagnet

Chicago, IL

November 2004

SEP 01, 2005 02:20 PM

why is anyone in a rush to get it over with?

JamesRiot

San Pedro, CA

December 2003

SEP 01, 2005 02:23 PM

"No, really, honey! I need you to do this as part of an IMPORTANT survey! Yep. Like usual. Ok, start counting."

FreakPirate

Canada

November 2002

SEP 01, 2005 02:26 PM

Hey... I like free stuff and masturbation!

StarBelliedBoy

Philadelphia, PA

December 2003

SEP 01, 2005 02:26 PM

FridgeMagnet said:
why is anyone in a rush to get it over with?

I want this because my current ex and fuck buddy was always dissappointed that she couldn't get me off with a handjob. Maybe this would make a difference for her.

Jubalharshaw

Saint Paul, MN

December 2002

SEP 01, 2005 02:30 PM

Wait, now they WANT minute men? I'm so confused...

Dear Sicily,
How big should my penis be again?

YouAreWhatYouIs2

Montreal, QC

July 2005

SEP 01, 2005 02:34 PM

29 strokes? That's bullshit...

jamie_manic

United Kingdom

April 2004

SEP 01, 2005 02:51 PM

...again...29???

ThisIsWhoWeAre

Oakland, CA

July 2004

SEP 01, 2005 02:59 PM

Hey... Americans want to jack off too. What about us?

waldo

I'm lost

June 2004

SEP 01, 2005 03:03 PM

ThisIsWhoWeAre said:
Hey... Americans want to jack off too. What about us?

I'd, uhmm, "give you a hand", but I can't reach from here...

mrmuddle

United Kingdom

May 2005

SEP 01, 2005 03:14 PM

ThisIsWhoWeAre said:
Hey... Americans want to jack off too. What about us?

K-Y will send you free stuff too.

unravled

Portland, OR

August 2003

SEP 01, 2005 04:15 PM

I thought it was how many licks.

xLusTx

Madison, WI

August 2005

SEP 01, 2005 05:02 PM

Sweet. Count me in.

Calypso

SUICIDEGIRL

California, USA

SEP 01, 2005 05:12 PM

*looks down*

Awww...Life isn't fair.

acetracer

Hollywood, FL

January 2004

SEP 01, 2005 05:26 PM

I think their results might be a bit flawed, keeping track of how long it takes to finish would make it a bit harder to finish at all. Plus, some guys don't use the "yank" method. I never have.

Lemonkid

Canada

May 2003

SEP 01, 2005 09:37 PM

AceTracer said:
I think their results might be a bit flawed, keeping track of how long it takes to finish would make it a bit harder to finish at all. Plus, some guys don't use the "yank" method. I never have.

I'm sure you can slap some of that cream between your mattresses...

FreakPirate

Canada

November 2002

SEP 01, 2005 09:42 PM

AceTracer said:
I think their results might be a bit flawed, keeping track of how long it takes to finish would make it a bit harder to finish at all. Plus, some guys don't use the "yank" method. I never have.

My plan was to fake the results of the survey for the free stuff.

Jah

I'm lost

August 2005

SEP 01, 2005 09:44 PM

Someone hurry, pass me the Stroke29..

MissMarina

Chicago, IL

November 2004

SEP 01, 2005 09:44 PM

Calypso said:
*looks down*

Awww...Life isn't fair.

My thoughts exactly! hmph.

tech29

I'm lost

July 2004

SEP 01, 2005 11:53 PM

Dont do it guys you'll go blind.....

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