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d20

d20

San Francisco, CA
September 2003

JUN 22, 2005 02:35 PM

Via Free Will Astrology:


Virgo Horoscope for week of June 23, 2005

Sharks have a bad reputation among many people, but to the native people of the Hawaiian island of Niihau they are na'aumakua, guardian spirits. I propose that they serve as your tutelary animal in the coming week, Virgo--protectors and guides that will inspire you to be tough-minded and fully at home as you hang out higher in the food chain than you ever have before.



according to this article written by some kook, you can actually get in touch with them by singing a funky little Hawaiian ditty.

if you connect the (rather erratic) dots, this means that at any moment i can summon a ghost shark to get all up in my enemies' shit, so watch out. d20's a fucking asshole.

Lemonkid

Lemonkid

Canada
May 2003

JUN 22, 2005 02:39 PM

Guardian spirits that eat you.

I'll keep myself safe, thank you very much.

Lumenagerie

Lumenagerie

Seattle, WA
May 2005

JUN 22, 2005 02:48 PM

At least I now have a shark as a guardian spirit and not a donkey or a chicken or some other lame ass animal.

FreakPirate

FreakPirate

Canada
November 2002

JUN 22, 2005 02:53 PM

Maybe I misread something... but is my (Libra) gaurdian animal really Dave Chapelle?

mQx

mqx

Seattle, WA
January 2003

JUN 22, 2005 02:55 PM

Sharks are way too messy to be Virgos. A Virgo shark would yell at all the other sharks for leaving pieces of Quint in their teeth.

d20

d20

San Francisco, CA
September 2003

JUN 22, 2005 03:04 PM

FreakPirate said:
Maybe I misread something... but is my (Libra) gaurdian animal really Dave Chapelle?



that makes too much sense to not be true.

Lemonkid

Lemonkid

Canada
May 2003

JUN 22, 2005 03:05 PM

d20 said:

FreakPirate said:
Maybe I misread something... but is my (Libra) gaurdian animal really Dave Chapelle?



that makes too much sense to not be true.



Damn straight.

Or in FP's case... Damn sexual-preference-rendered-clouded-by-entirely-too-many-online-photos-of-him-making-out-with guys.

unravled

unravled

Portland, OR
August 2003

JUN 22, 2005 03:09 PM

Mqx said:
Sharks are way too messy to be Virgos. A Virgo shark would yell at all the other sharks for leaving pieces of Quint in their teeth.




I'll Quint you.

_DictionaryGirl_

_DictionaryGirl_

NEWSWIRE

San Diego, CA

JUN 22, 2005 03:13 PM

As a Pisces, it appears that my spirit animal is a mojo-drenched fetish turtle. Rock on.

_DictionaryGirl_

_DictionaryGirl_

NEWSWIRE

San Diego, CA

JUN 22, 2005 03:17 PM

Squire

Squire

I'm lost
November 2003

JUN 22, 2005 03:27 PM

Sharks are fucking assholes.

d20

d20

San Francisco, CA
September 2003

JUN 22, 2005 03:59 PM

Xixax said:
...and you really can't sing a cute little song to get in touch with yours.



augh, my powers! NNNOOOooo.....

SusannahJoy

SusannahJoy

HOPEFUL

Bakersfield, CA

JUN 22, 2005 04:11 PM

my friend was almost eaten by a shark. his back looks all gross now. it's one big mess of scar tissue. we call him shark boy. smile

_DictionaryGirl_

_DictionaryGirl_

NEWSWIRE

San Diego, CA

JUN 22, 2005 04:17 PM

Xixax said:
you really can't sing a cute little song to get in touch with yours.



Damnit! I want my spirit fetish turtle!!! frown

mQx

mqx

Seattle, WA
January 2003

JUN 22, 2005 04:18 PM

unravled said:

Mqx said:
Sharks are way too messy to be Virgos. A Virgo shark would yell at all the other sharks for leaving pieces of Quint in their teeth.




I'll Quint you.



Don't don't mind getting you stuck in my teeth. biggrin

Viola

Viola

SUICIDEGIRL

North Carolina, USA

JUN 22, 2005 04:25 PM


Get that turtle out of your hair, young lady.

Cassiel

Cassiel

Aurora, CO
September 2004

JUN 22, 2005 06:02 PM

Y'all know me. Know how I earn a livin'. I'll catch this bird for you, but it ain't gonna be easy. Bad fish. Not like going down to the pond and chasing bluegills and tommycocks. This shark, swallow you whole. No shakin', no tenderizin', down you go. And we gotta do it quick, that'll bring back your tourists, put all your businesses on a payin' basis. But it's not gonna be pleasant. I value my neck a lot more than three thousand bucks, chief. I'll find him for three, but I'll catch him, and kill him, for ten. But you've gotta make up your minds. If you want to stay alive, then ante up. If you want to play it cheap, be on welfare the whole winter. I don't want no volunteers, I don't want no mates, there's too many captains on this island. Ten thousand dollars for me by myself. For that you get the head, the tail, the whole damn thing.

tomahto

tomahto

San Bruno, CA
June 2003

JUN 22, 2005 06:32 PM

hmmm, anyone here know hawaiian better than me? I think it's na aumakua. two separate words.

d20

d20

San Francisco, CA
September 2003

JUN 22, 2005 06:39 PM

while we're on the topic of speaking hawaiian, can someone tell me how to say "respect the Sharklord, bitch"?

Koleeta

Koleeta

Los Angeles, CA
May 2003

JUN 22, 2005 08:32 PM

who's Walter Jones?

Belllla

Belllla

Houston, TX
February 2004

JUN 22, 2005 08:35 PM

"Shaaks. They only bite you when you touch them in their private paahts."

SurfBetty

SurfBetty

Atlantic Beach, FL
December 2003

JUN 22, 2005 08:46 PM

Mine started quoting GW and there was a pic of a gator and some chick.hmmmmm. confused


I sing to sharks all the time..but it's more like...*huuuuummmmm.. i know you are out here, even though I can't see you...so please don't eat me..hummm*...kinda like that. tongue

d20

d20

San Francisco, CA
September 2003

JUN 22, 2005 09:49 PM

Xixax said:
In attempts to ansswer your questions, I did find this

Slightly Bent Hawaiian Phrases

I'd have to say that these two are tied for my favorite

Waiter, my papaya has been previously fondled.
E ke kuene, ua milimili 'e 'ia neia mikana!

If I snore, I would like to apologize in advance.
Ke nono au, e kala mua mai, i keia manawa ho'i.



This Merlot is an ungrateful bitch.
He kanapapiki mahalo 'ole keia mea inu Merlot ia'u.