NEWS: Smugglers Get Crafty

CULTURE: Smugglers Get Crafty

Smuggling cocaine is tricky. Condoms burst, mules die, and there's only so much powder you can pack into one person. Crafty smugglers thought something new was needed.

US Customs spotted the fakes, and have found over 750 pounds (338 kg) of cocaine. The article doesn't say what's going to happen to the real plantains, but I'm sure they'll think of something.

Man, this plantain soup is THE BEST SHIT EVER, OKAY????!!!

let's all think of a clever way to smuggle cocaine.

i say mixing it in with powdered sugar, i'm sure it's easy to seperate later on.

Or, soak it into your jeans

platanos cocainas!!!!! kinda makes platanos maduros seem crappy WEEEE!!!!!!

platanos cocainas!!!!! kinda makes platanos maduros seem crappy WEEEE!!!!!!

I don't do cocaine....but if you fry the plantains just right they're pretty tasty...you can boil them to....but it's a little more bland. Try them as a side with some fried fish or a chicken stew.

hmmm sounds a little Martha Sewartesq

Dissolve it in coca-cola. Surgically insert it into a sealed off cow's stomach, within the living animal. Sub-orbital rocket.

This shit is bananas.

Why don't they just chuck all of them into water? I'm sure the real plantains float and the fake ones sink.

Maybe.

No, you're thinking of witches.

I wonder what sort of ingenuity these smugglers have come up with that customs HASN'T caught onto. For every cleverly disguised shipment they catch, there are probably dozens, if not hundreds, that they miss. 750 pounds isn't even a drop in the bucket. Drug cartels can lose practically every other package they send and still turn a profit. But you won't hear about that from any ONDCP propaganda.

Hahahahahhaa!

I remember near the end of Traffic (the American film version), when Catherine Zeta-Jones is showing the drug dealers her doll whose body is made of a cocain mix which gets boiled down or something. Untraceable, even by search dogs. I wonder how much of that was fictional.

I'm sure Hollywood researched the plot of Traffic thoroughly.