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sparklecore

sparklecore

United Kingdom
October 2004

MAR 10, 2005 01:25 AM

I went out with this boy when I was about 16, he was 18, and we broke up for various stupid kid reasons. We hadn't spoken for 4 years until last Christmas. I went to a gig he was playing at, and somehow we ended up together. We've been seeing each other since then.
I told a friend that I was back seeing him yesterday and they came out with some things I didn't really want to hear. Basically, about 3 years ago, the boy I'm seeing spread a load of nasty rumours behind my back, and laughed about me behind my back with all his friends. I wouldn't mind if this was just name-calling, because I did that to him with my friends, but this was about my body and various parts of it.
I didn't know whether to just leave it or confront him with it, seeing as it was 3 years ago and he seems to have changed so much since then, butI told him I knew about it, and he said to just forget it, and that we both said a lot of things we didn't mean back then. He said if he had truly thought that about me he wouldn't be seeing me now. Then why say it? I feel like I can't be around his friends now for wondering what intimate stuff they know about me. Everytime we'll do something I'll be thinking "but don't you really think ....... about me, why are you touching me?"
I don't know what to do, I care about him. Should I just end whatever is happening because of what he said 3 years ago about me?

EndedBen

EndedBen

Grand Rapids, MI
August 2004

MAR 10, 2005 01:32 AM

So, Sometimes you doubt his commitment to Sparklecore?

sparklecore

sparklecore

United Kingdom
October 2004

MAR 10, 2005 01:34 AM

Yes!! haha smile

TheSeadog

TheSeadog

Reunion
September 2004

MAR 10, 2005 01:39 AM

SmellinOfTroy said:
So, Sometimes you doubt his commitment to Sparklecore?


Holy shit, I've lost all bladder control.


pale_blue_eyes

pale_blue_eyes

Santa Barbara, CA
April 2004

MAR 10, 2005 01:40 AM

i would dump him. i just think i wouldnt be able to get over it. that ish bugs me.

zenFish

zenFish

Vancouver, BC
August 2004

MAR 10, 2005 01:44 AM

Meh... the past is the past... and time heals all wounds.

And, guys do that, trust me, EVERY guy does that... no matter if he got dumped, or did the dumping.

I'd bring it up, talk it over, get it off yoru chest, and then move on.

But thats me.

ReverendBenzo

ReverendBenzo

Savannah, GA
September 2003

MAR 10, 2005 01:49 AM

It's true all guys do that. We're assholes. That doesn't make it right. I'd kick him to the curb.

TheSeadog

TheSeadog

Reunion
September 2004

MAR 10, 2005 01:56 AM

DrGonzo2000? Are you an upgraded version? shocked

Yuriel

Yuriel

I'm lost
January 2004

MAR 10, 2005 02:01 AM

DrGonzo2000 said:
It's true all guys do that. We're assholes. That doesn't make it right. I'd kick him to the curb.



Politically correction inserted here: All humans do this wink
That doesn't make it right or fair. And we really should stop. Or at least offer genuine apologies for being such utter jerks about it.
smile
EL SUICIDO LOCO

ReverendBenzo

ReverendBenzo

Savannah, GA
September 2003

MAR 10, 2005 02:05 AM

TheSeadog said:
DrGonzo2000? Are you an upgraded version? shocked



Not really.

FleurDeGuerre

FleurDeGuerre

United Kingdom
August 2004

MAR 10, 2005 02:15 AM

You should join the girl's only group, everyone in there is always full of good advice on such matters! smile

DaGhost

DaGhost

USA
December 2003

MAR 10, 2005 02:25 AM

I would say that this depends on you. Meaning on your feelings and ability to forgive/forget.

It sounds like he is more mature and sorry he acted like a punk kid. If things are going well and you feel like he is into you (read: and your body), then let it go and be happy together.

If you are going to dwell on it or if you think he doesn't like you (or your body) then you have to move on for both of your sakes.

(IMHO)

B57913

B57913

I'm lost
May 2004

MAR 10, 2005 02:27 AM

切除他的睪丸

sakita

sakita

Sweden
February 2003

MAR 10, 2005 02:47 AM

maybe he did really mean "we both said things we didnt mean" . peo ple say things sometimes when they are angry that they do not mean.
He was younger and may regret what was said. I say give him the benefit of the doubt, he has said that if he really meant those things he said 3 years ago, after a break up he wouldnt be with you.
And he is with you.

Yuriel

Yuriel

I'm lost
January 2004

MAR 10, 2005 02:55 AM

ERADICATOR said:
切除他的睪丸



Wow. A post understandable only to Asian Linguistics majors and... Chinese natives.... whom probably do not get to use this site from where the majority of said populace lives.

Yet I find it utterly fascinating. Why?
surreal
EL SUICIDO LOCO

_Sarah_

_Sarah_

Kalamazoo, MI
January 2003

MAR 10, 2005 02:59 AM

Sometimes people slag on someone after a breakup to save face. There is also quite a difference in maturity (usually) between 18 and 21. If he's with you, says he wants to be with you, treats you like he wants to be with you, and has apologized, all you can do is trust him.

If you continue to pester him about it and continue to make it an issue, even after the discussion has ended (which it has), he WILL start insulting you. wink

sparklecore

sparklecore

United Kingdom
October 2004

MAR 10, 2005 02:59 AM

yeah, me too. strangely hypnotic. still doesn't answer my q tho smile