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3/8/05
3/8/05

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Pav

Pav

I'm lost
February 2004

MAR 08, 2005 01:19 AM

The Israeli Defense Force is trying to locate D&D players in their ranks in order to lower their security clearance.

Players may be "detached from reality," according to a military statement, and thus more susceptible to influence.

In Israel there are thousands of players, between the ages 16 to 35, and include lawyers, high-tech workers and businessmen. Matan, 22, and Igor, a 21-year-old IDF soldier, organize activities for groups of players. Soon hundreds of fans are expected to meet in a forest in the southern part of Israel for a two-day game of pure fantasy.

"It's not a game of winners and losers," Matan says,
"but rather entry into another world with stories and plot changes."

He is aware of the game's problematic reputation, especially in the IDF. The army is not indifferent to the unique hobby and is trying to locate soldiers who in their free time dress up as witches and play in forests.



I don't know why you'd need a high security clearance in the first place. You can just cast Lightning Bolt at anyone who tries to stop you.

Conchobhar

Conchobhar

Columbia, MD
January 2004

MAR 08, 2005 06:29 AM

How dumb is that...I thought our military did stupid shit.

avalyn

avalyn

Utica, MI
March 2003

MAR 08, 2005 06:48 AM

Out of mom's basement and into the governmental dungeon.

tragicmelusine

tragicmelusine

Puerto Rico
January 2005

MAR 08, 2005 06:54 AM

Hm, maybe our weapon of mass destruction is, in reality, a good 'ol Displacer Beast. Or maybe a Black Dragon? skull

POH

POH

Seattle, WA
July 2004

MAR 08, 2005 06:56 AM

Cruise Missile of Palestinian Slaying +3?

Shad

Shad

West Chicago, IL
February 2004

MAR 08, 2005 06:59 AM

Actually it might be a good precedent. If they started lowering the security clearance of people who are "detatched from reality" then maybe we could start demoting republicans over here on the same grounds. Sounds like a fair trade to me

PointBlank

PointBlank

New York, NY
November 2004

MAR 08, 2005 07:01 AM

The person who came up with this idea has a 4 Intelligence and a 3 Wisdom.

Buuuurrrn!

Dejajeva

Dejajeva

Syracuse, IN
December 2003

MAR 08, 2005 07:01 AM

*Obfuscate, Lvl 4* I vanish Israel from mind's eye.

hebeighost

hebeighost

USA
June 2004

MAR 08, 2005 07:01 AM

I am just at at a loss for words...I mean really. But perhaps all those geeks who got beat up in high school just need to find some Israeli buddies to get their back.

"Alright guys, we need to suppress the insurgent football players, then go to the store to buy more dice, and finally pick up more Mountain Dew. Then I will give you all 5000 experience points. Yes, I will let you be a half dragon, but only if you promise not to abuse it."

What would a geek do if he had control of a crack Isaraeli defense squad?

[Edited on Mar 08, 2005 7:05AM]

threejane

threejane

San Francisco, CA
November 2004

MAR 08, 2005 07:02 AM

In related news, any soldier uttering "It's the asshole waltz" is to be immediately transferred to Operation Human Shield.

Edit: spelling is fun.

[Edited on Mar 08, 2005 by threejane]

Dejajeva

Dejajeva

Syracuse, IN
December 2003

MAR 08, 2005 07:05 AM

Dejajeva said:
*Obfuscate, Lvl 4* I vanish Israel from mind's eye.



Oops. Wrong game.

POH

POH

Seattle, WA
July 2004

MAR 08, 2005 07:10 AM

#2: Maybe the IDF thinks that "Rifts" or "Synnibar" is more appropriate?

kender

kender

Columbia, MO
September 2004

MAR 08, 2005 07:14 AM

tragicmelusine said:
Hm, maybe our weapon of mass destruction is, in reality, a good 'ol Displacer Beast. Or maybe a Black Dragon? skull



I'd put 10 to 1 on it being a Tarrasque. If you're going to have a D&D monster, you might as well go for the gold.

[Edited on Mar 08, 2005 7:18AM]

alpha_hazard

alpha_hazard

Fort Collins, CO
April 2004

MAR 08, 2005 07:16 AM

does this mean I can avoid responsibility if there is a draft?

"Sorry, I'm very detatched from reality, I am not only a Level 18 Paladin, but also a level 25 Jedi Guardian and a level 12 Thief!"

theseeman

theseeman

Asheville, NC
December 2002

MAR 08, 2005 07:21 AM

Does the have a problem with homophobia?

KMFCM

KMFCM

Peekskill, NY
September 2002

MAR 08, 2005 07:34 AM


I think they just don't want people who will "attack the darkness"

RandomNerd

RandomNerd

I'm lost
January 2005

MAR 08, 2005 08:01 AM

Hm. It seems there's something Rabbis and Baptist ministers can agree on.

As a side note, it's to my understanding that D&D got introduced overseas largely by servicemen who played it at their bases.

FrankMask

FrankMask

Saint Paul, MN
June 2003

MAR 08, 2005 08:14 AM

tragicmelusine said:
Hm, maybe our weapon of mass destruction is, in reality, a good 'ol Displacer Beast. Or maybe a Black Dragon? skull



Oh come on. A displacer beast couldn't even take on a tank. Now a catoblepas, or however the hell thats spelled, they've got death rays!

rottenart

rottenart

Norman, OK
February 2004

MAR 08, 2005 08:17 AM

is there a special pocket on those cargo pants for a 12-sided die?

DigitalPilager

DigitalPilager

Hensley, AR
August 2004

MAR 08, 2005 08:36 AM



tragicmelusine said:
Hm, maybe our weapon of mass destruction is, in reality, a good 'ol Displacer Beast. Or maybe a Black Dragon? skull


no....the kobolds...they wouldnt expect the kobolds

AkiraLi

AkiraLi

Norristown, PA
March 2003

MAR 08, 2005 08:54 AM

DigitalPilager said:


tragicmelusine said:
Hm, maybe our weapon of mass destruction is, in reality, a good 'ol Displacer Beast. Or maybe a Black Dragon? skull


no....the kobolds...they wouldnt expect the kobolds


Guys, guys. We're talking about going up against modern weapons right? What are most modern weapons and ammo made out of? That's right, metal. If we're gonna have a WMD it better be a Rust Monster.


[Edited on Mar 08, 2005 by Akira]

DigitalPilager

DigitalPilager

Hensley, AR
August 2004

MAR 08, 2005 08:56 AM

i think that a good reflex save can get you out of that one

Wren

Wren

SUICIDEGIRL

Minnesota, USA

MAR 08, 2005 09:39 AM

kender said:

tragicmelusine said:
Hm, maybe our weapon of mass destruction is, in reality, a good 'ol Displacer Beast. Or maybe a Black Dragon? skull



I'd put 10 to 1 on it being a Tarrasque. If you're going to have a D&D monster, you might as well go for the gold.



Not only did you beat me to it, but I'm DISSAPOINTED that I didn't get to say it. I'm a nerd.

This is lame, but not surprising. You tell people you play D&D and they assume you're some sort of crazy loser. Unless they play D&D, too.

Wren

Wren

SUICIDEGIRL

Minnesota, USA

MAR 08, 2005 09:41 AM

bmac said:
Tattoo policy
Tattoos or brands that are visible in a class A uniform (worn with slacks/trousers) are prohibited.

In short, no naked chicks on my ass.



Your ass would be visible in trousers? What kind of uniforms do you think the Army wears?! eeek

beledi

beledi

Love, SK
January 2003

MAR 08, 2005 09:47 AM

DigitalPilager said:


tragicmelusine said:
Hm, maybe our weapon of mass destruction is, in reality, a good 'ol Displacer Beast. Or maybe a Black Dragon? skull


no....the kobolds...they wouldnt expect the kobolds



A herd of kobolds in a confined space can be more damaging than a wyrm in an open field. It's true. We lost a party once that way....

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