Squirrels are the devil

Seriously, they must be. there's one on this branch right outside my window and the little fucker won't shut up. Do squirrels serve a purpose for the earth?? eat bad insects or something? I need a reason to be at peace with their loud, annoying existence.

squirells are beings of pure evil, smart and bloodthirsty, I've seen them rip the crust right off of a loaf of bread....horrible.

but these animals eat other things too. i need something that is totally exclusive to squirrels

They clean up all those damned nuts lying around. You ever slipped on one of those? Hurts like hell when you come down.

They make excellent prey for my bulldog...he thinks they are rats...and actually they're really not much more than tree rats.

An interesting sidenote: A recent study found that if you forced squirrels to smoke marijuana , they tend to play with their nuts ,instead of store them.

Furry tailed bush rats.

omg I can't believe this is a thread... lol I have a bit of a squirrel obsession. I happen to think they are cute and funny to watch. I feed them all the time. But, I am a big ole dork, soooo....yeah....

Red squirrels rock. Grey squirrels are fucking shit.

I once had an encounter with a suicidal squirrel.

My campus is covered with em!

You fool! Now that the squirrels know that you know, your days are numbered.

if the little bastard comes any closer to my window, he's gonna get an empty can thrown at him. (yeah that's pretty weak, but its all i have around me)
oh wait

HA! empty beam bottle

That is sooooooo cute !

i don't have a camera or i would, so you can see his evil beady eyes

The cuteness is all part of the EVEELLLLL...manys a time I had a clear shot and couldn't do it, cute little beady eye's...and a loaf of bread was torn apart.

They are around so we can test our brakes when those little fuckers run in the street and cant figure out which way they want to go

thats whats keepin the empty bottle in my hand too

cats do that too.
as do cows.

And he's behind bars too, right where he and all his ilk belong!

I always wanted to teach a squirrel to smoke cigarettes so he could bum them off people at the college I went to.

GENIUS!

or just steal em from people's pockets.

i think a ferret could do that....

I had an "accident" with one of those gas powered passlode framing nailers, and a squirrel's head. It was over very quickly. The moral of the story is that squirrels should wear hard hats.

That's nothing. I met Squirell Jebus! He' could walk down the sidewalks on campus, and the squirells would follow him, on either side of the walk, a few feet off. When he stopped, they'd stop, when he started up again, they'd follow him. Cause he was jebus.

I once ran over a squirrel while driving a bus. When I looked for him his little noggin was lodged in between the rear duals. I called the base and asked them if I should do anything, and they said "Get it out of there!" So I used my clipboard to kinda work it out. Afterwards I called back and told them mission accomplished, and they all laughed hysterically. So squirrels have scarred me for life.

That's pretty much the most horrible story I've ever heard.